Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei!
by Maxine-san
Summary: What happens when Wufei goes too far and pisses off a lady who he really shouldn't have, once again bringing chaos to the GW boys? Is being a woman as easy as they think? Finished!
1. Prologue

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Prologue

_disclaimer_ - GW isn't mine. Obviously.

_notes_ - I started writing Women Aren't Weak here on FFnet in 2000, and it was finished in March of 2002. So yeah, it's old, lol. I haven't changed anything since then, so if you just so happen to recognize the fic, that's why. Though I kind of doubt anyone from back then would be reading this again, hehe. If you can make it through the first couple of chapters, which were the first chapters I wrote of something _ever_, it starts to pick up. I think so, at least!

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It is the year AC 197. All the Gundam Pilots, Relena, Hilde, Dorothy, and Midii (she just happened to attend the same high school as the rest of the gang) are now 17 years old. They are all staying at Relena's house since she does have a very BIG house. Plus, they're only 17, they don't have a lot of money. Well, Wufei works part time as a Preventor with Sally, who is 19, almost 20, but that's beside the point. Trowa left the circus and Quatre still works at his father's corporation, but his sisters are working there right now. The rest didn't have any jobs to begin with, and now that the wars are over and their gundams are gone, they have nothing to do. Duo and Hilde have been going out since before the wars ended, but as of right now they are the only real couple. Trowa was reacquainted with Midii, and they are close friends (close friends? riiiiight). As of right now, the gang, minus Sally, is sitting around the living room doing various classes homework.

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Argh. It's painful! Painful, I tell you! Please, I beg of you, at least force your way through until chapter 5! The story really, really does get better!

-Maxine


	2. Chapter 1

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 1

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The Gundam Gang sat around the living room doing various types of homework. Actually, they didn't have a lot of homework tonight, surprisingly, mainly math and health. They had a lot of homework in Health because the class was starting a new unit...one that most of the guys dreaded...reproduction. They were going to learn the whole spiel, and personally, none of them really cared about it. Naturally, Wufei was leaving this part of his homework for last. They had to read the section about women's reproduction systems and answer some questions, and he didn't really want to learn all about stupid onnas. Relena and Hilde, however, were already reading it, because they personally didn't care, after all, they were females. Quatre was also reading it blushing the whole time. Finally Duo spoke up. 

"Quatre, what's so embarrassing about that that it's making youblush? It can't be that bad!" Quatre looked up startled, and even more red-faced.

"Well, uh... It's just that they explain a lot, and there's all these...ah...p-pictures..." he trailed off.

Duo's face lit up. "Wow, seriously?" he exclaimed, obviously having the wrong idea.

"Duono baka," said Heero. "Not the type of pictures your thinking of! They're... diagrams... or something."

"Haven't you guys read it yet?" asked Hilde from across the room.

"No, and I'm not going to!" Duo shouted back.

"Well why not?" asked Hilde as she and Relena walked over to them carrying their books. Wufei was the one that answered.

"We're not reading it because we do not need to learn about you weak onnas and how you reproduce!"

"Geez, Wufei! You're so narrow-minded," said Sally as she walked into the room.

"What are you doing here?" asked Wufei, clearly trying to look annoyed.

"I just decided to stop by and say hi. What were you all talking about?"

"We were just talking about our health homework," answered Dorothy. "We're learning about the reproductive systems in women, and Wufei seems to think we're too weak to read about." Sally looked amused at that.

"Well, Wufei," she said, "If you actually read the book, you might not think us so weak anymore."

"Nothing would make me think that onnas are not weak!" Wufei growled.

"I think you guys are just scared to know what we go through," said Midii slyly from across the room.

"Hey!" yelled Quatre defiantly. "I read it!"

"Well you've got 29 sisters, so you should already know some of it," said Dorothy. Quatre glared at her.

"I'll read it," said Heero.

"Yeah, same here, it doesn't bother me," said Trowa.

Duo didn't say anything but when Hilde gave him a look, he quickly said, "Oh! Uh, yeah, me too, I'll read it. Sure, no problem..." He had started mumbling towards the end. He picked up his book and slowly flipped to the pages he was to read. The first thing he saw was a picture of a naked woman, not detailed or anything, but still naked, and in big, underlined words, Going Through Puberty: As A Woman. Duo gulped and started to read.

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:cringes: 

I so just want to go through this whole thing and rip it to shreds editing it... But I won't. I will...refrain, lol...

-Maxine


	3. Chapter 2

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 2

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The girls were all enjoying watching the guys sweat as they read on and on. Their faces were quickly changing from bored to semi-interested before they quickly took a detour towards disgusted. They were obviously reading the part about menstruation. As they neared the end of the puberty section, which was all they were supposed to read tonight, they slammed their books shut. Heero and Trowa looked the least affected since they had their masks of indifference on, but you could still tell they looked bothered.

"That's nasty," said Duo.

"Didn't you know about any of that?" asked Hilde, slightly amused.

"I grew up in a church, and I was young at the time, then the war came, I never had time to learn much about the opposite sex," grumbled Duo.

"If that's what you onnas thought would make me see you not so weak, you were wrong," said Wufei. "It just makes me think you are more weak not to be able to deal with it." That was it, the girls were really pissed off now. But before they could do anything about it, there was a flash of light and a bunch of purple smoke. When it cleared, Heero and Trowa had their guns pointed at a strange looking woman in a big cloak. Duo had is gun out also, but he had pointed it randomly at something, and that something happened to be Dorothy's head.

"What the hell are you doing!" shouted Dorothy as she knocked his gun away. Duo put one hand on the back of his head and backed away sheepishly.

"Uh... sorry Blondie, didn't mean to."

"Who are you calling Blondie, you braided baka!"

The cloaked figure sweatdropped before coughing a little. Everyone turned towards her only to find that shewas glaring at Wufei.

"Who the hell are you?" Wufei snapped.

"I am the Goddess of-"

"DEATH!" shouted Duo. She glared at him. He backed away and decided to keep quiet for awhile.

"Ahem, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted." Duo backed farther away. "I am the Goddess of Women-" She was cut off again.

"Goddess of Women! Are you proud of that?" asked Wufei. "No wonder they're so weak." She turned back to him.

"You, young man, are the reason that I am here! I am sick and tired of how you are always putting down women. Truthfully, I'm just fed up with you. But after tonight, I thought maybe you would have a little more respect for women. Obviously I was wrong. I am going to show you first hand what women have to go through. Maybe then you won't think we are too weak." Wufei snorted at that. "Actually, I think I will make all you pilots pay for this, though Wufei was the worst. That way you will know not to piss a woman off. I think two weeks should be enough time." And with those last words, the Goddess of Women left in another cloud of smoke, leaving behind ten very confused girls and...more girls!

"AHHHHHH! She turned us into women!" shouted Duo as he started grabbing on his braid. "Oh, wait a minute... I've always had long hair! Eh-heh, sorry." The others all glared at him, and then checked to make sure they were indeed still men. Thankfully, they were. For a while, no one could figure out what the cloaked person had meant, but it was soon forgotten, and the Gundam Gang trudged to bed.

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I'm not even looking at it. Next chapter, next chapter, next chapter... 

lol, I'm not actually ashamed of this fic or anything. I mean, I was 13 or 14 when I started writing these chapters, so inevitably they're not going to be that good. Just...need to get past them and to the better stuff...

-Maxine


	4. Chapter 3

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 3 

Wow, ok, I know that the whole weird lady idea in the last chapter was odd, but work with me, I had to have a way for the guys to be... oh wait, never mind, you have haven't read that part yet. :)

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The night went by without anything else weird happening, and morning rolled in. Wufei was sleeping peacefully, and he should have been for about thirty more minutes, but there was suddenly a heavy weight on his chest and he was finding it hard to breathe. He then realized that he couldn't breathe because there was a pair of around his neck shaking him back and forth. Wufei's eyes flew open, and he found himself staring into the Prussian blue eyes of Heero Yuy, who was always awake earlier than anyone else. Wufei was about to ask him what the hell he was doing when he suddenly noticed something different about Heero, but he couldn't place it since he didn't have his contacts in yet and everything was slightly blurred. (Wufei really has glasses, but he never wears them, so I'm saying he has contacts.) It was around this time that Wufei noticed Heero was repeating the same thing over and over again. Something about it being all his fault. 

"This is all your fault, Wufei! Omae o korosu! You are going to die, and if not by my hands, then I'm sure Trowa, Duo, or Quatre, well, maybe not Quatre, but someone would do the honors!" Wufei just stared blankly at him for a couple seconds before saying,

"Do you have a cold or something?" He stopped. "Do _I_ have a cold or something?" Wufei had noticed that his voice seemed significantly higher than it should. He looked at Heero again, who was still on top of him but no longer shaking him, and realized what he had noticed was wrong. "What the hell happened to your hair?" Heero didn't answer; he just glared at him. 'Hair shouldn't grow that fast overnight,' thought Wufei. (he's still waking up) He looked at Heero again. His hair was past his shoulders by about four inches, and it looked very messy the way it was flying everywhere. "Why is it so long?"

"How the hell am I suppose to know? Whatever you did last night really pissed that woman off," answered Heero.

"What are you talk-" Wufei stopped, he really didn't like the way his voice sounded, plus he just remembered what Heero was talking about. "Would you mind getting off of me?" Heero stood up and waited for Wufei to get out of bed. Wufei sat up and reached over to his nightstand to put his glasses on. He then looked over at Heero who was wide-eyed and staring at him. Actually, Wufei noticed that he was staring more at his chest, and he never slept with a shirt on. He also noticed that Heero had taken a very feminine body figure. Wufei had a very bad feeling about this. Very slowly, he looked down and stared at his chest. He stared, and stared, and stared some more. Finally he yelled out, "KUUSSOOOOOO!" He stared wide-eyed at Heero who stared right back, and then back down to his chest again. He had breasts, and they were NOT suppose to be there! Heero had pulled a T-shirt out of Wufei's drawers, and Wufei caught it and quickly put it on as he threw it to him. He then calmly got out of bed, put his contacts in, and stared at his reflection in the mirror. His facial features looked softer, with no trace of facial hair. He then turned around to look at Heero.

'Oh great, here we go, he's gonna start yelling,' thought Heero. But before either one of them could say anything, they heard someone screaming down the hall.

"AAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The voice sounded strangely like Trowa, but they had never heard Trowa yell like that before. They took one look at each other and took off running down the hall to Trowa's room. Of course, he was already running to their rooms, so they ended up in a big pile on the floor. After he recovered, Trowa sat up and started screaming,

"What the hell happened! Why am I in a girl's body!" Heero glared at Wufei and Trowa suddenly understood what happened. He then started cracking up.

"I think he's going insane," muttered Wufei.

"Wrong, he already WENT insane," replied Heero.

At that point, Quatre sauntered out into the hall, already dressed for the day -God knows wear he got the clothes, he does have a lot of sisters. He also had his hair up in a half ponytail. Trowa finally stopped laughing, he couldn't get over the fact that they were girls, and the three on the floor stared at Quatre. He started to blush.

"Well, uh, you see, when I woke up, I sort of figured out what had happened, and I know how to do hair and stuff thanks to my sisters, and I found some of their clothes in the back of my closet, so I decided to make the best of this..." he trailed off. "However," Quatre started speaking again, "there were some things I did not have." Blushing, Quatre gestured towards his chest, where you could tell he wasn't wearing a bra. The three on the floor made no comment. Trowa finally spoke up,

"You know, it figures that we had to be turned into good looking women," he said. The boys-turned-girls looked at themselves. It was true, they had been given very nice figures, and big enough bust sizes to match any popular Playboy model.

"Well," said Heero, "the girls will find out sooner or later, so we might as well go tell them now."

"What about Duo?" asked Quatre.

"He'll come down when he's hungry," replied Trowa. The four boys slowly made their way downstairs, not wanting to be in the hell that would surely arise.

* * *

Hehe, it still amuses me all these years later. The GW boys as women... :shakes head:

-Maxine


	5. Chapter 4

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 4

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Heero, Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei slowly made their way downstairs. They got as far as the kitchen door, but they didn't go all the way in. They stood outside of it for a while, listening to the girls talk inside. Relena, Hilde, and Dorothy were making breakfast this morning. Sure the cooks could do it, but every so often the girls thought it was fun to bake stuff themselves, even if some of them weren't that good at it. 

"Damn! I burnt the waffles again!" Dorothy exclaimed. This was the third one she had burnt.

"I'm telling ya, Dorothy, leave the cooking to us, you just mix the batter," said Hilde. Sally, who had stopped by for breakfast like she usually did, stopped what she was doing, and stood listening. She thought she had heard some voices outside the door, but it seemed no one else had noticed.

Outside the kitchen:

"I am not going in first!" said Wufei, as the others tried to push him towards the door.

"It's your fault we're in this mess, so you can go explain it to them!" Heero said as he and Trowa tried to push him towards the door.

"Hell no! I'm not going in there by myself to explain to them why I now have a weak woman's body!"

"Um...guys?" Everyone looked at Quatre. "Why don't we just all go in there at one time, that way no one gets too embarrassed." He suggested. Trowa and Heero looked at him like he was insane while Wufei started nodding his head saying it was a good idea. At that moment however, Sally opened the door.

"I heard you guys talking. Why don't you want to come into the kit-" she stopped. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped. The boys, uh, girls could only stare back at her with wide eyes. Hilde came up behind Sally.

"Hey guys, we heard you yelling upstairs, but we figured that you could just take...care...of...yourselves..." she trailed off and stared at the sight before her. Soon Relena and Dorothy were beside her with the same expression on her face. The only sound heard was the crickets chirping in the background and Midii bounding down the stairs.

"Sorry girls, I overslept." She then saw the four new girls in front of her. "Oh, I didn't know we were having guests over. What's wrong with you guys, and where are the boys?" she asked Sally and the others who were standing there with their mouths wide open. Surprisingly, it was Relena who broke the silence by laughing hysterically. She couldn't stop herself, and soon the others were joining her, except for the boys-turned-girls and Midii who still hadn't noticed who the new girls were.

"Oh man! This is too much! When that lady said she'd make you pay, I didn't actually think she would turn you into WOMEN! Hahahaha!"

"It's not funny, Relena!" said Heero in a voice that sounded nothing like his own, causing the girls to laugh even harder.

"Wait a second," said Midii. "Are you telling me that these are the gundam pilots turned girls standing in front of me!" The other girls nodded. Midii then joined them in their laughter. Eventually their laughter died down.

"If I'm correct," said Hilde, "I remember that woman saying something about two weeks being enough time. I'm guessing that means you guys are going to be in those bodies for the next two weeks." The boys stared back at her with wide eyes.

"You've got to be kidding!" yelled Wufei.

"Just shut up Wufei! This is all your fault!" Everyone stared at Quatre in shock. He never spoke like that. His face reddened. "Oops, sorry, I'm not too pleased with the situation right now, that's all. Hehe"

"Well," said Relena, "I guess we'll have to make the best of this. Today is a Saturday luckily, so we can take you guys out shopping if you want. That way we can get you some clothes that fit." The boys looked scared at the idea of going shopping. It was bad enough helping other girls pick out clothes, but having to try them on their selves!

"Uh...Relena, um...we can't go shopping because...uh...it would be a waste of money since we're not going to be women forever. Can't we just borrow some of you clothes?" asked Heero desperately.

"It's not a problem, I'm sure that some of us will be able to use any clothes we buy," Hilde answered witha gleam in her eye that made the boys shrink back and the girls nod their heads. "We can do that after breakfast. Why don't you girls, I mean, guys, come eat." Everyone followed her to the table and began to help themselves. "Where's Duo?" Hilde asked.

A grumpy Wufei answered, "The braided baka is still sleeping."

"No I'm not," said Duo as he slowly sat down at the table rubbing his eyes. It was obvious he hadn't noticed any differences in his appearance yet. If you glanced at him really fast, you probably wouldn't be able to tell because his hair was the same length and still in its braid. However, there were other differences that made you sure he was now a woman. Duo glanced around the table, his eyes widening. "Why didn't you guys tell me you were having friends over! I wouldn't have come downstairs in my night clothes!" shouted Duo as he started to get up to go change. The girls rolled their eyes while the boys stared at him in disbelief. "Wait a second," Duo said, "you all look familiar, are you in some of my classes or something?"

"Stupid braided baka." Wufei started mumbling.

"Hey! You remind me of Wu-man!" said Duo smiling.

"Do not call me that, Maxwell!" yelled Wufei.

"I wasn't calling you that, I was calling Wufei tha-" he stopped. "Ya know" he said slowly, "you look like him too." He continued looking around the table. "And you look like Quat, and you look like Trowa, and you look like Heero."

"By golly, I think he's got it!" said Quatre sarcastically. Duo paled, suddenly remembering the events from last night.

"Don't tell me," he said. "It is you guys, isn't it? Only you're in a woman's body." The others stared at him with 'noshit, Sherlock' looks on their faces. Duo started laughing. "Ha! Sucks for you all! Man, you really shouldn't have pissed her off Wu-man!"

"Did you think that you were spared, Maxwell?" spat Wufei. Duo stopped laughing.

"You mean I'm a woman too!" He pulled at his hair, which was still a long as always, and looked down. His eyes widened to see that his chest was sticking out farther than it should have been beneath his shirt. He could guess the reason why. "Heh, I guess I hadn't noticed." Duo said weakly. He started swaying back and forth like he was going to faint, and plopped back into his chair. "Two weeks?" he asked meekly.

"Yup," replied Sally.

"Geez," Duo murmured. It was silent for a minute while Duo sat thinking. "Well," he said slowly, "let's eat!" he exclaimed, and then promptly started digging into his food. The others sweatdropped and stared at him in disbelief again.

* * *

Haha, oh, Duo. Hmm, now I'm feeling like watching GW all over again. :sigh: The memories... 

-Maxine

Next Chapter: We're going to the mall! The Gundam boys finally find out what it's like to 'shop till ya drop'!


	6. Chapter 5

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 5

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After breakfast, the Gundam Gang had to face the problem of finding the boys-turned-girls some clothes that would actually fit them. They had plenty of outer clothes to choose from, ranging from Relena's wardrobe to what Quatre had of his sisters' clothing. However, outer clothing wasn't the problem. They couldn't seem to find lingerie the right size to comfortably fit the boys. They were proportioned larger than most of the girls. Relena and Hilde didn't even bother getting out their assortment of bras; they knew they would never fit into them.

"I can go back to my place and grab some of my clothes," suggested Sally, "and you guys can try on Dorothy and Midii's clothes. They might have something that will fit you." With that, Sally left to pick up her own clothes. The boys were not looking forward to the next part. They were actually going to have to try on bras! That was something they never thought they would have to do.

"I don't see why we have to wear these," mumbled Wufei. "They're pointless. They show through your shirt and they look uncomfortable. What's the point of them anyway?" The girls just looked at each other and smiled. The boys could be so clueless at times.

"They're for support." Said Midii. "There are many different kinds and they each have their own purpose. Take a sports bra for example. Without them, you can't run easily, it actually hurts sometimes. If you never where a bra you'll start to sag when you get older.."

"Sag?" asked Quatre.

"Uh...never mind Quat, just don't worry about it."

"...Ok, if you say so." He still looked confused.

"Here," said Dorothy, throwing a collection of bras at the boys, "go try these on and tell us how they fit." Quatre picked up one of the bras and immediately started blushing, as did Heero, surprise surprise, as he could easily imagine Relena in something like that. He would never admit it though.

"Awwww, do we have to? I agree with Wu-man, can't we just go without them? Pleeeaaase?" pleaded Duo quite pathetically.

"NO," said Hilde, shoving him into the bedroom. The boys weren't gone for more than two minutes before Duo poked his head out with a sheepish look on his face.

"Uh... Hilde, babe, um... could you help me snap this thingy in the back, I can't get it all the way."

"Oh, Duo." Hilde sighed. "Come here."

"Thanks, babe!"

"No problem."

"Hey guys!" yelled Duo as he walked back into the room, "I figured out how to get it on right!" A chorus of "Duo," "Shhhh," and "Not so loud!" could be heard from inside the room. The girls laughed.

Finally, Duo, Quatre, and Heero stepped out of the room, claiming they were comfortable. However, Wufei and Trowa didn't come out.

"Are you guys ok in there?" asked Midii, banging on the door. Wufei openedit a crack and peeked out,looking extremely embarrassed.

"Um...this doesn't really fit."

"Well, is it too small or too big?" asked Relena.

"Definitely too small. So is Barton's, but he's too embarrassed to come out and say anything."

"Shut up, Wufei!" Trowa yelled from inside the room.

"Well," started Relena, "we'll just have to wait for Sally to get back. Maybe you'll fit into something of hers, at least until we get to the mall." Wufei paled at the idea of going to the mall, and then blushed at the idea of wearing something of Sally's.

"No need to wait for me, here I am," said Sally. Luckily, what she had fit the boys well enough, and they were finally ready to go. Well, maybe not.

"Wait a minute!" shouted Hilde. "You all can't go to the mall looking like that! Let us do your hair! We can put it nice and pretty." She said with this gleam in her eye. Wufei backed away.

"I don't need my hair to look 'nice and pretty'," he practically growled.

"Oh come on. It's not that bad. Heero, I can do yours! I won't do anything bad to it!" said Relena.

"No way! You are _not_ touching my hair," he said, backing away, but unfortunately he backed right into the arms of Dorothy and Hilde who dragged him over to a chair in front of the mirror.

"Don't worry, it's not that bad," Relena assured him. She picked up the brush and ran it through his hair, or at least she tried to. However, as tangled as his hair used to be as a guy, it was longer and about ten times worse as a girl.

"Ow ow ow! Relena, you're pulling my hair out!" screeched Heero.

"Oh, you're such a big baby. Big tough guy can't even brush his hair."

"Maybe his head is more sensitive as a girl," suggested Duo, glad that he could still put his hair in a braid and not be bothered to do anything else with it. Finally, about thirty minutes later, the girls had managed to persuade the guys into letting them do their hair. Of course, the most they could get done with it was putting it into a half ponytail, but at least it was brushed. So around 11:00 a.m. the group piled into two cars and headed off to the mall.

When they got to the mall, the first store they went to was a lingerie store. Nothing too fancy, and they got just enough stuff to last them the two weeks. Of course, the guys couldn't seem to understand that if they just tried on the clothes given to them without any arguments, they would have been out of the store pretty quickly. Wufei, however, did not want to try on anything. He was pretty unnerved and felt awkward walking around in a "weak woman's" store, so he put up a fight to just about anything given to him, therefore causing him to stay longer in the store than was necessary. We all know that afterwards, though, he blamed it on everybody else.

By the time everyone had the right lingerie, it was past lunch time. Well, according to Duo anyway.

"Can we puh-lease go eat now!"

"Duo, it's only 12:30, how can you possibly be that hungry?" Hilde asked. Duo wasn't paying attention.

"Oh! Look! There's the food court! Come on!" He ran off to the restaurants.

"Blech, fast food, just what we need." Sally dryly commented. The group found a table to put their stuff at, and was about to go stand in line somewhere when Duo had to speak up again.

"Wait! Um... I have to go to the bathroom."

"Then go, its right over there," Midii said.

"I don't think you understand. I need to use the restroom." The others just looked at him. "Well... isn't it like an unwritten law or something that girls have to go to the bathroom in groups of at least two?"

"No! Just because we always seem to go to the bathroom in groups doesn't mean you HAVE to," retorted Hilde.

"Oh. Well, it _should_ be a law," Duo muttered.

"Duo," started Dorothy, "I get the feeling you WANT someone to go with you to the bathroom." Hilde smacked her forehead.

"Duh, how could we be so stupid." The others looked at her. "Think about it, guys. It's his first time going to a public bathroom by himself as a woman. I certainly wouldn't want to go into a men's bathroom by myself for the first time."

"Oh, do you want someone to go with you Duo?" asked Relena.

"Uh...hehe, that would be nice, yeah," he stammered. Trowa was surprisingly the first to volunteer.

"I'll go with you, Duo."

"I actually have to use the restroom, too," said Relena. Hilde also said she would go. So the four walked off towards the bathrooms while the others ordered their food. Duo stopped at the door.

"After you," he said, referring to the real girls. They pushed through the door, and as soon as they entered, they were hit with a cloud of different smelling perfumes all mixed together. Duo and Trowa immediately started coughing. To make matters worse, there was-

"A line! There's a line to use the bathroom in here? What's up with that?" Duo practically shouted.

"Quiet Duo! It's a Saturday, so the mall is crowded. Women don't go to the bathroom as fast as men do. Just wait a minute," said Hilde. Duo contented himself with scrutinizing the interior of the bathroom. It was nothing like a Men's Room.

"Hey, no fair, you guys have couches in here, and a lot more space. There are bigger mirrors too! Not that we really spend too much time in front of a mirror, but that's beside the point."

"You do, Duo," Trowa stated. Duo glared at him.

"Duo, you really shouldn't speak so loud. People are going to think you've had a sex change or something," Relena whispered.

"Well, technically I have," Duo pointed out. Relena rolled her eyes. By the time they finally got around to using the bathroom, Hilde and Relena had to do a check up on their make-up. Suddenly a group of girls came barging in, all trying to comfort some girl who was crying hysterically.

"Honey look, it's ok. Jon was a bastard anyway. You'll get over him in no time and find someone else."

"I don't want someone else Courtney! I want Jon!"

"No you don't, some other girl spoke. "He wasn't loyal to you! You need someone better than that."

"Oh, and who are you to be talking about loyalty, Ms. 'you were out of town and I was just keeping your boyfriend company in HIS apartment'!"

"Oh,Jess do we REALLY have to bring that up AGAIN?"

"Ha, some friend you are. I don't think you ever apologized!"

"I did, but you were to busy ranting and raving to ever listen to me!" Duo and Trowa stared wide-eyed at this, as suddenly an all out cat fight started.

The girl who was crying finally yelled,"Hellooooo! This is about ME! You are supposed to be comforting ME! I don't give a crap about Jess's boyfriend! You really shouldn't worry so much about that anyway, he was a terrible kisser."

"When did you ever kiss him!"

"Uhhhh...um, anyway, you were right, I don't need Jon, he's a jack-ass," she said quickly.

"I thought you still liked him?" the girl named Courtney asked.

"You're right, I do!" She started crying again. Another girl came running into the bathroom.

"Guys! It's ok. I talked to Jon because I was really pissed, and it turns out the girl he was with is his cousin! He was just holding her hand because she's blind or something." The others all stared at her, and Duo thought this was the perfect time to grab Hilde's sleeve and drag her out the door.

"Ok, that was scary," Duo said, still wide-eyed.

"..." Trowa nodded in silent agreement.

"That's not scary," Relena said. "That's normal. Happens all the time." The guys stared at her.

"She's right, ya know," Hilde agreed. The four then went and bought some food before heading back to the table. When they got there, Duo started talking to the other guys.

"Hey guys, no matter what, no matter how bad you may have to go, do NOT go to the bathroom until we get home." Trowa nodded his head. The other three decided it would be better if they just didn't ask.

After lunch, the group started shopping again. They went into one store, and the girls started picking out outfits for the guys.

"Ooooh, Wufei, this color would look good on you. Try this shirt on," Dorothy said as she handed him a shirt.

"Um...Dorothy," said Wufei as he held up the shirt she gave him, "It's only half a shirt." Dorothy looked at him oddly. "Well it is! Look, if I tried it on, my whole stomach would be showing."

"Wufei... it's supposed to be like that." Wufei blushed.

"...Oh." He went and tried it on without any argument. On the other side of the store, Trowa was having similar problems.

"I thought we were done trying on bras." He said as he looked at the shirt Hilde had handed him.

"We are," said Hilde. "That's not a bra Trowa, its a shirt." Trowa looked at her skeptically.

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive. It shows your midriff, sort of like those things Catherine wears."

"Ohhhh, I see. And you want ME to try it on."

"Yep."

"Oh ok...no."

"What do ya mean 'no'?"

"I'm not wearing something like that! I'm really a guy, in case you've forgotten, and I'm not trying to get other GUYS to look at me."

"Awww, but I thought it would be cute on you 'cause you have curly hair and it brings out the color of your eyes, which, by the way, do not ALWAYS have to be covered by your hair," Hilde said as she pushed the curly hair over Trowa's eye behind his ear. "There, see? Now go try this on." Trowa had gotten confused somewhere along the line when Hilde suddenly started talking about his hair and how it brought out his eye color or something, and did as she said.

"Hey guys!" yelled Relena from the dressing rooms. "Come here, I wanna see what you think of this outfit."

"No, Relena! Stop, I don't want them to see me in this!"

"Aw, why not? It looks good."

"Relena, we're supposed to be finding clothes for the guys, not for us," said Sally as she and some of the others walked in to the dressing rooms.

"Oh, it's not me," she answered trying to pull someone out into the open.

"Ah, stop, stop, stop!" But it was too late. Relena yanked him out of the stall so that everyone could see his new ensemble.

"Hey, looking good!" Duo teased as he and the others watched Heero blush red from the attention before glaring at Duo. Heero stood there in tan Capri pants and a light pink spaghetti strapped T-shirt that clung to his, well, her curves. He also had a light pink bandana in his hair, and platform tennis shoes adorned his feet.

"Wow, Heero. That outfit really looks nice on you," said Sally.

"Yeah, if I were a guy again I might be tempted to ask you to dinner or something."

"Omae o korosu, Duo."

"Yeah sure, like that'll ever happen. Relena and I have both heard that threat more times than I can remember, and yet here we are," teased Duo. Heero started clenching his fists, and was seriously wondering if he should carry out the threat, at least on Duo's part anyway.

After about two more hours of endless shopping, the group decided to get ice cream. The guys were all wearing some of their new outfits, though not the ones they would have preferred to wear, but the ones that the girls had claimed were "Mall Clothes." As they were walking, they passed a rather large group of guys hanging around the fountain. The girls continued walking, looking straight ahead, but Duo and the others couldn't help looking at them suspiciously.

"Uh oh," said Duo looking at one of the guys, "I know that look. I've seen it many a time. Speed up guys." However, it was too late. The group hanging out started whistling and calling out to them. They also start following them. The girls tried to ignore them, but the boys had never come up against this before, so they were getting a little ticked. One guy came up and slung his arm around Quatre.

"Hey, Blondie, what's your name?"

"None of your business," answered Quatre tartly.

"That's fine. If you don't tell me yor name, then I won't tell you mine. However, for the time being, you can call me milk, 'cause I will do your body good," he said, sliding his hand lower on Quatre's back.

"Oh please, is that the best you can come up with? That line is so old. I could do better than that!"

"Well then, why don't you come over to my place and I'll show you how original I can be," he said, flicking his tongue at Quatre and pinching his rear. Quatre turned around and slapped him across the cheek, hard.

"Ow, bitch!" said the guy as he walked off holding his cheek.

"Ow, ok, _ow_, I think that hurt me more than it hurt him," said Quatre, holding his hand.

"Nice hit, Quat. Bam, right in the kisser."

"Thank you, Duo."

Suddenly Wufei's eyes went wide and he "yiped."

"What was that Wu-man?" asked Duo. For the time being, Wufei ignored the fact that he had called him Wu-man, and answered.

"Someone just pinched me!"

"Slap him, like Quatre did."

"But I don't know who," he said, looking around. Just then one of the guys came up and put his arm around him like what had been done to Quatre. At this point, the girls up front were getting tired of this, and Relena turned around and walked up to man.

"Excuse me, but you mind leaving us alone!" she said as she lifted his arm off Wufei's shoulder.

"Oh, I'm sorry, were we bothering you?" the guy said sarcastically.

"Piss off!" Relena yelled.

"Aw, and if we don't, what're ya gonna do? Huh?" Relena looked briefly at someone behind him.

"Absolutely nothing," she said with a smirk. "However-"

"I will," Zechs finished. The guy turned around and looked up into the eyes of Zechs Marquise aka Milliardo Peacecraft.

"Oh, uh, we were, uh, we were just leaving! Uh yeah. C ya!." With that he and his group ran off.

"Hey, Milliardo!" Relena said while hugging him. "Hi, Noin!"

"Hey, are you all ok?" asked Noin.

"Yeah, we're fine thanks. What are you doing here?"

"Probably the same thing you are: shopping."

"Oh yeah, duh, Relena. Sorry"

"What are you all doing here by yourselves?" asked Zechs in that big brotherly way.

"Oh, well, uh, we figured with ten girls, we would be ok." Relena answered, suddenly remembering the boys were no longer boys. The guys also remembered, and desperately wanted to leave.

"Well, who are your friends?" asked Noin.

"Oh how silly of me, you don't know them. They're friends from school." Relena answered, trying to stall. "Uh, girls, this is mybrother, Milliardo Peacecraft, and his fiancé, Lucretzia Noin. They just came back from Mars for their wedding. Milliardo, Noin, this is, um...well why don't you guys introduce yourselves."

"Oh, heh, thanks Relena, how kind of you," said Duo dryly.

"Well, why don't we start with you," Noin suggested looking at Wufei.

'Oh great.' He thought, and said the first name that came to mind. "Sally." 'Shit' he though, 'bad name.'

"Oh, you're a Sally too?" asked Noin.

"Oh, uh no, I was just going to ask her something," Wufei answered, trying to stall. "My name is, um...Meiran! Yeah that's it." He mentally winced at his choice of name.

"I'm Iria," said Quatre.

"Mary," said Heero.

"Cathy," said Trowa.

"And, saving the best for last, I'm Helen," said Duo.

"You remind me of Duo," said Noin. "Especially with the braid and all."

"Oh, uh, hehe, um...who's Duo?"

"Oh, someone we know," answered Noin.

'That's all I am? Just someone they know? Wonderful,' thought Duo.

"Where are the boys, anyway?" asked Zechs.

"They had an emergency mission," answered Sally quickly. "Nothing too important, but they will be gone for awhile."

"I wasn't aware they had a mission," said Zechs. "Actually, other than Wufei, I didn't know they worked for Preventors."

"Yes, well, Lady Une must not have told you. They work part-time. Their mission wasn't anything major."

"So they'll be gone for our dinner then. That's too bad, now we have five extra places." The others winced mentally, they'd forgotten about the pre-wedding dinner.

"Hey! Why don't you bring your friends here! There's enough room for them!" Noin suggested.

"Um...Ok, we'll try to do that," said Dorothy.

"Alright, well, that's tomorrow night, so we'll see you then. Bye, girls!" said Noin as she and Zechs walked off.

"Phew, that was close," said Midii.

"No joke. I was starting to sweat," Duo said.

"Well, we have everything we need. I guess we can go now," said Dorothy. Normally, the guys would be glad they were finally leaving, but they all had one thing on their minds' at that moment. Just how were they going to survive a whole evening with Zechs trying to act like girls, and not slipping up on their true identities?

* * *

I remember when I wrote this that my goal was to show the harassment some girls put up with from guys... :sweatdrop: Hahaha...ha... :cough: Yeah... 

-Maxine


	7. Chapter 6

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 6

* * *

That evening when the Gundam Gang returned home, they were anything but happy. 

"You know, we don't have to go to this dinner. You could just say we couldn't make it, and Zechs will have five extra seats. No biggie, right?" pleaded Duo.

"Duo, my brother paid a lot of money to reserve places at this restaurant. We can't just leave five places empty," Relena replied.

Trowa snorted. "Oh yeah, I'm sure he's really in debt now, he being a Peacecraft and all, that family just doesn't have any money," he snapped. Relena, not having a comeback to that, just stared wide-eyed at him.

"Did Trowa just snort?" Midii whispered to Dorothy.

"Yeah, and then he snapped at Relena!" she replied in awe.

"Hmmm..."

"Well its settled," Hilde said. "You guys are going, you don't have a choice."

"Wait a minute! We didn't settle anything!" Wufei exclaimed.

"You're going, Wufei. That's all there is to it," said Sally. Wufei crossed his arms, "hmphed," and turned away. Midii, wanting to remove some of the tension in the room, suggested they watch a movie or something before going to bed.

"Yeah! That's a good idea," said Hilde, and she immediately ran over to the TV and started searching the HBO channels. "Oh, guys! Look! Titanic is showing! We could watch that, except it already started."

"Ohhh! I haven't seen that in forever!" cried Relena.

"No way!" said Duo. "Isn't that a chick flick?"

"Well, you're a girl now, so you can deal with it," snapped Hilde.

"I think we should watch it," said Sally. Dorothy and Midii agreed.

"Doesn't the main female actor in that...uh, show herself...indecently?" Quatre asked meekly.

"She sure does," answered Relena.

"Ok then! What are we waiting for? Sit down, watch the movie!" exclaimed Duo. Then he paused. "Actually, that doesn't really excite me as much as I would have thought. Guess it's because I'm a girl. Oh well," he said more to himself than anyone else. The others just looked at him before turning back.to the television.

"But, isn't it like, THREE hours long?" Wufei said in a last attempt to get them to watch a different movie. His comment went unheard, so he gave up and sat down.

About two hours, four bags of popcorn, and three liters of soda later:

Relena, Hilde, Midii, and Quatre were all out crying. Duo and Sally looked like they were barely making it, and Wufei, Trowa, and Heero were trying to be the tough guys who were never affected. However, if you looked closely, you could tell their masks were slipping because their eyes were all watery and an occasional sniffle could be heard from them. Dorothy was seemingly unaffected.

"I've never actually watched the whole thing, why did he have to die!" Quatre bawled, and Hilde put a comforting arm around his shoulder.

"You guys are such :sniff: weaklings. I don't see why :sniff: you all are :sniff: crying," Wufei said, and then reached up to wipe away the tear that threatened to fall from his eye.

"Oh, you're just as bad as they are, Wufei, so shut your trap!" Dorothy said, as she started picking up the stray glasses and popcorn bowls. Relena and Hilde got up to help her, while the others sat around trying to regain their composure. When they finished, Hilde looked up at the clock.

"Well, it's almost midnight, I'm off to bed. See ya'll in the morning. Oh, and, Midii? I call first shower!" With that she dashed off up the stairs to claim the bathroom.

"Hey!" cried Midii and she went running after her.

"Oh, a shower sounds really good now, I need one of those," said Quatre as he started walking upstairs. Then he stopped. "On second thought, I think I can go a day without a shower," he said, suddenly looking nervous. The other guys looked at him, knowing exactly what he was thinking, and got a sinking feeling in their stomachs.

"Yeah, I think I'll wait until tomorrow," said Trowa, who looked like he still hadn't recovered from the movie experience. He seemed almost too affected by that...

"Hn," said Heero, and the rest all went to bed.

& & & &

The next day went by without any events worth writing about (hehe), and it was soon time for the gang to get ready to go to Zech's and Noin's pre-wedding banquet dinner thingy, even though the wedding isn't for another three weeks or so.

"Hey, Relena, what are we supposed to wear to this dinner thingymabobber?" asked Duo.

"I believe it's supposed to be semi-formal, so you can just wear one of the skirts we bought you with a blouse or something."

"Uh-uh, no way, I'm NOT wearing a skirt or dress," said Wufei. "You can't make me."

"You wanna bet?"asked Dorothy quirking an eyebrow.

"Look, Wufei, it won't be that long, if you really don't want to wear a dress, you can wear dress pants or something," Relena suggested. "You just have to look nice."

"No matter what you wear, you cannot go with your hair looking all messy. This time we definitely get to do your hair, no questions," said Hilde holding up a brush.

"I think she wanted to be a hair dresser before she joined OZ," Duo muttered to Quatre. Quatre nodded in agreement.

It took a while, but after about an hour, (and a few pairs of ripped stockings) everyone was ready to go. Somehow, the girls had managed to pile the guys' hair on their head in various stylish hairdos. They didn't necessarily like it, but it was done none-the-less.

"Did you hafta put ALL of my hair in this bun?" complained Duo. "I feel like I'm going to fall over backwards any minute now; it's too heavy!"

"Shut up Duo. You're making my headache worse." Growled Heero as reached up to feel the many tight, small, extremely tight braids that had been put in his hair. Did I mention that they were tight?

"Trowa, uh, can I ask you something?" asked Quatre. When he didn't get an answer, he continued. "Is it different being able to see out BOTH of your eyes at the same time?" He asked it with a serious face, but you could tell he was kidding around. Duo snickered as Trowa snapped his head around to glare at Quatre.

"Whoa, careful there, buddy, too much fast movement and that...curly, knot thing on the back of your head is gonna fall out," teased Duo.

"With all the hairspray and pins they put into my hair, I really don't think it's going to fall out. It'll be a miracle if I can ever GET it out."

"Tell me about it," muttered Wufei.

"Would you guys stop complaining!" snapped Relena. "I have to put up with this all the time. The least you can do is deal with it ONE time."

"We shouldn't even have to deal with it once," muttered Heero as he glared at Wufei out of the corner of his eye.

"Uh, can we go now?" asked Wufei, and without waiting for an answer, he walked out the door, his _skirt_ blowing around his legs in the wind.

The group got to the restaurant a little late, but that was to be expected. As they walked in, the other people who were there greeted them: Lady Une, Noin and Zechs, of course, and some other Preventor workers whom they'd befriended. Zechs stood up to give his sister a quick hug before turning to the table to introduce the new girls to the others.

"Guys, I would like you to meet some of our other guests. You all know my sister, Relena, and I'm sure you've seen Dorothy, Midii, and Hilde around," they all nodded and some waved, "and I know you know Preventor Sally Po."

"Where are the gundam pilots?" asked Lady Une. The group winced. Zechs' eyes widened.

"You mean you don't know?" Une shook her head. "Well, we were told you sent them on a mission." Now Lady Une's eyes widened.

"A mission! They aren't even Preventors!" Zechs narrowed his eyes.

"They aren't?" He frowned and turned to the group. "Care to explain?"

"..." was all that he got.

"Well," started Sally, "they uh, they're, well...I can't say where they went. I promised I wouldn't. They'll be back in time for your wedding, but they'll be gone for about two weeks. They needed a... vacation," she quickly made up.

"Vacation?" Noin asked. "What do they need a vacation from? Their spring break is next week."

"Well, who could stop them? They're gone, that's all there is to it."

"Irresponsible little..." muttered Zechs, and the others had to hold Wufei back as his eyes narrowed and he started mumbling about injustices or something. Heero's hand unconsciously went toward where his gun would be. All this went unnoticed by Zechs. "Anyway, would you like to introduce yourselves? I apologize, but I don't remember all your names. I believe you're Helen," he directed at Duo, who nodded his head. He looked towards the others.

"Mary," said Heero.

"Cathy," supplied Trowa.

"Meiran," mumbled Wufei.

"I'm...uh..." Quatre paled. 'Shoot! I don't remember which of my sisters' names I used.' He thought. 'Was is Rebecca? No...Amy? Nuh-uh. Susan? No, must have been-' "Maria." Quatre finally said. Noin looked at him oddly, and Duo smacked his forehead with his hand.

"I could have sworn you said Iria at the mall," said Noin.

"Oh, uh, hehe, you must have heard me wrong."

"Hmm... well, why don't you all sit down?" suggested Noin. They all did.

The group was finally able to order their dinner, and soon they were all ready to eat. Too bad the gundam pilots were not used to eating lady-like.

"Ow! Damn it Hilde, that's like the third time you've elbowed me. What's up?" Duo whispered to Hilde.

"You need to slow down! You're practically inhaling your food!" she whispered back.

"But I always eat like this."

"That's the problem. When you were a guy, people could deal with it, but technically, you aren't 'Duo' anymore, and you want to give these people a good impression. You're a woman now and you need to act like one!"

"Fine," mumbled Duo as he tried to eat his food more slowly. He didn't eat much more anyway because he suddenly didn't feel hungry anymore. 'Strange,' he thought, 'I usually eat a lot more than this. I'm not hungry though.' Duo frowned. 'But this is my favorite meal! Just one more bite.' He couldn't do it though, and he found that really disturbing. Midii was watching him from across the table, and chuckled quietly. Duo looked up and glared at her before snapping his head to the other end of the table where he thought he heard his name being said. "What?" he asked. Zechs, Lady Une, and a Preventor named Amy all looked at him. "I thought I just heard someone say my name." Duo said without thinking.

"Uh, no, we were talking about Duo Maxwell." Said Lady Une. "It seems one of our workers has a little crush on him," she said looking towards Amy who blushed slightly, as did Duo.

"Oh do you?" asked Duo, suddenly interested. "And just what is this Duo like?" he asked Amy.

"I've only seen him around a few times, but he's really cute and-"

"He's a stupid, lazy baka who thinks very highly of himself," commented Heero from across the table. Amy looked surprised at that, and Duo glared at him.

"And where did you hear that from?" Duo asked dryly.

"I've seen him around school and Hilde has told me some stuff," Heero answered with amusement in his eyes.

"Well I think he's cute," Duo said indifferently.

"You would," Heero retorted.

"You don't?" asked Duo innocently. "Oh that's right, you like Heero!" he said in a sing-song voice. Heero's eyes widened.

"I do not!" he yelled.

"Don't deny it, you told me remember?"

"I did not!" Heero yelled again, getting really pissed off.

"Fine, say what you want. Actually that's a good thing because he's Relena's guy." Both Heero and Relena blushed at that, and Heero didn't make any other comments. Zechs frowned at the idea of Heero and Relena together. "Actually, I think that," Duo looked around the table and grinned evilly, "Trowa's hot." On the other side of the table, Trowa immediately choked on his food and started coughing; Dorothy pounded on his back until he recovered. He then glared at Duo who smiled innocently at him. Noin regarded all this with interest.

"Oh really? Well if you ask me," Trowa looked towards Wufei who gave a 'don't you dare' look. "Wufei's the cutest guy at our school." Sally held in her laughter as Wufei glared at Trowa.

"Wufei's a jackass," said Quatre casually while still eating his food. Wufei jumped up.

"I-He is not!" he yelled. Sally couldn't hold it in any longer and burst out laughing, causing Wufei to glare at her. (A/N: there's a lot of glaring going on, isn't there?)

"Do have some feelings for ,Wufei?" Lady Une asked...Wufei, amused at all that was happening. "Well, you're going to have to fight with Sally on that one." Sally stopped laughing abruptly and blushed slightly while Wufei's eyes widened in shock.

"What?" he asked shocked while falling back into his chair.

"Well, anyone for dessert?" Sally asked quickly.

"I couldn't eat another bite," said Duo wearily. He was answered by a chorus of shocked "WHAT!"'s from Hilde, Relena, Quatre, and Heero.

"My stomach hurts, I think I already ate too much."

"Your stomach hurts?" asked Midii. Duo nodded. 'Hmm...' thought Midii. 'I wonder, first with Trowa, now Duo...' her thoughts trailed off.

"Actually, if there's anything with chocolate..." Duo said, suddenly feeling better.

'Something's not right here,' thought Noin as she looked around the table. 'Something's off...' she turned to start a side conversation with Quatre. "So, how are your sisters doing?" Quatre seemed genuinely pleased that she had asked, and started to reply without thinking.

"They're all doing good. Actually, Kristen was just offered a job on L3 and-" he stopped, realizing what he had just done, and Relena, who was sitting next to him, slapped her forehead. "Shit," he muttered. Noin checked to make sure no one else had heard before saying:

"I had a funny feeling that might be you. Quatre, right?" Quatre nodded while blushing. "Oh, weird! How did that happen? Let me guess. These are the other gundam pilots, right?"

"Yes, but it's a really long story." Quatre then proceeded to tell Noin in hushed tones why he was now in a girl's body. By the time he was done, everyone was getting ready to leave.

"Wow, that's weird. Don't worry, I won't tell anyone. But man, I wish you luck these next two weeks."

"Thanks," Quatre replied.

"Well, thank you all so much for coming. I hope to see you all again before our wedding. Good night." With that, Zechs led Noin away by the arm, but not before she turned to say, "Goodnight _guys_," emphasizing "guys," to the group. Heero and Trowa stared after them.

"What was that all about?" asked Wufei.

"She knows who we are," answered Quatre.

"What! How does she know?" asked Heero.

"She uh, she sort of guessed," replied Quatre meekly.

"Um, guys we better get going," said Relena quickly to save Quatre from any further questioning. "We have..." she stopped walking and talking, and paled. "Oh shoot, you guys! We have school tomorrow!"

* * *

:gasp: Oh no, school! Such a horrible, terrible thing! Hehe. 

More chapters to be posted soon!

-Maxine


	8. Chapter 7

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 7

* * *

The guys looked at Relena like she had grown an extra head or something.

"Relena," said Heero slowly. "We can't go to school tomorrow. We aren't even registered. Five new girls just don't suddenly show up to school!"

"I know that Heero," Relena replied exasperatedly. "I was just wondering what excuse we are going to use when all of our teachers start wondering why you five were out of school for a whole week."

"We can just say they all came down with a really bad case of the flu," Sally suggested. "I'll write a note or something."

"I don't think we should leave them home for a week by themselves," said Midii doubtfully. "I mean, what if something happens?"

"What could possibly happen!" exclaimed Duo. Midii looked over at him, and then back at the girls.

"More than you realize," she replied, sharing a look with the other girls.

"Well," started Hilde, "Sally can probably check on them from time to time, and we just have one of us stay home each day this week. That way the rest of us can go to school." The others contemplated the idea.

"Yeah," said Relena. "That'll probably work. Hilde, you can stay home first, since it was your idea."

"Sounds good."

"You know, we don't need a babysitter, we aren't going to burn down the house," complained Wufei.

"Oh shove it Wufei," Sally said, smacking him lightly on the arm. He glared at her in return, and Sally just laughed.

& & & &

The next morning found Wufei, Quatre, Duo, and Heero all lounging around the living room doing various things. Wufei and Quatre were playing chess, and Heero stood behind them watching the game, while Duo lounged lazily on the couch searching through channels on the TV. The girls, aside from Hilde and Sally, had gone to school much earlier.

Trowa trudged into the room with a pale face looking a little sick. He leaned up against the wall ignoring the weird/concerned looks the others were giving him.

"Guys," he said wearily, "I think that there is something seriously wrong with me."

"What's up T-man? You ok?" Duo asked, seriously worried.

"I don't really know." Trowa answered slowly. "I just know that I feel like crap, and I think...well, uh..." he paused, and had this strange look on his face.

"Go on." Quatre urged, looking up from the chess game.

"Well, I think I'm...bleeding internally... or something."

"WHAT!" the others all shouted.

"Bleeding internally? What makes you think that?" Duo asked. Quatre remained quiet; he had a thoughtful look on his face.

"I, well...I mean, I," Trowa said looking flustered, "I can...see it, I guess, on my, uh well...you know..."

"Trowa, I-" Quatre started, but was cut off.

"Come on Trowa man! We gotta get you to a doctor or something," yelled Duo as he grabbed Trowa's arm and prepared to drag him out the door.

"Trowa you don't understa-" Quatre tried again.

"Duo!" Heero yelled, cutting him off. "Sally and Hilde are in the kitchen. Sally will probably be able to help him."

"Good thinking Heero! Come on Trowa! Let's go." Duo then proceeded to haul Trowa into the kitchen with Wufei and Heero following, and Quatre still trying to tell Trowa something.

"Trowa! If you would just listen!"

"Not now Quat, this is an emergency!" Duo said, and then pushed open the door to the kitchen. "Sally! You are just the person we were looking for! Trowa's in trouble. He's bleeding internally!" Sally looked up from her conversation with Hilde with a shocked look on her face.

"What? Bleeding internally? How do you know?"

"I dunno, but Trowa said he was and he can see it and stuff. His stomach's probably damaged or something and it's leaking into his intestines and is coming out, and he really needs help or he's gonna die!" Duo blurted out. Trowa smacked his forehead with his hand, trying to hide his embarrassment, while Wufei muttered about how disgusting that sounded. Hilde glared at Duo before looking over and catching Sally's eye. They both had an amused smile on their faces.

"Um, excuse me. But just what is so funny about this? Trowa's dying here man!" Sally and Hilde chuckled.

"He's not dying Duo. Just let me ask him a question. Trowa, do you have pains in your lower abdominal area. Around here." Hilde said gesturing towards her stomach.

"Yeah I do. How did you know?" Trowa asked confused.

"See, it IS his stomach. He's going to die!" Duo wailed.

"He's NOT going to die Duo! I get that way once every month, and I'm not dead." Hilde said slowly, hoping at least ONE of the guys would catch on. She had no such luck.

"You get internal bleeding once a month?" Wufei asked.

"Ewww! Sucks for you!" said Duo.

"No! Not internal bleeding. You guys are sooo clueless." Hilde muttered. The guys just looked at her with blank faces, aside from Quatre. "I get that way EVERY MONTH, you know, and when I do, I refer to it as 'My. Time. Of. The. Month.' " Hilde said punctuating the important words. Realization slowly showed on each of the guys' faces.

"You mean..." Heero started.

"He has..." added Wufei.

"Oh no way! You can't be serious!" finished Duo with a disgusted look on his face.

"I TRIED to tell you." Quatre said, crossing his arms.

"How would you know about it?" Wufei asked, turning to Quatre.

"Wufei, I've got 29 sisters. There's like, 30 days in a month. There was not one day when I was growing up that at least one of them did not have their period." Quatre answered. It was quiet for a moment before Trowa yelled out:

"NOOOOOOOOOOO! I do NOT have my period! This is NOT happening to me!" He looked at Hilde and Sally with a panicked face. "Tell me this isn't happening!"

"Sorry babe, it's happening." Sally smirked.

"Well, I guess your gonna need some certain things, aren't you." Hilde said, taking him by the arm. "Come on." With that, Hilde practically dragged a panicked and totally out of character Trowa out of the room.

"Wow," started Duo, "that is too weird. Oh well, sucks for him."

"I wouldn't get too cocky Duo." Said Sally. "You four still have over a week left as girls. I bet all of you will eventually get your 'time of the month.' This is probably one of that weird lady's ways of saying, 'ha! See, women AREN'T weak.' " With that, Sally walked out of the room, leaving behind four shocked, and now worried "soldiers."

"You don't think that could really happen to us, do you?" asked Duo in a panicky voice.

"Well, it happened to Trowa, so I guess it could happen to us," Quatre replied, sitting down at the table. The others joined him, looking as if someone had just died. Almost twenty minutes later, Hilde and Trowa came back into the room, with Sally trailing behind. Hilde set two packages down on the table.

"Ok, I figured that since there is a slight possibility of this happening to all of you, then we should have a little talk so that you know what to do." The guys looked anything but excited at the idea. Before any of them could say anything, Hilde started talking again. "Now," she began, picking up the smaller box that had the word Tampax written across the front. "These are called tampons," she then picked up the other package, "and these are maxi-pads." Hilde then started to explain briefly what each was for, before Quatre interrupted her.

"Hilde, I really don't think you need to explain all this, I mean, I'm sure we know what to do with those." Both Duo and Heero blushed slightly.

"Well Quatre," Duo snapped, "not all of us havetwenty-nine sisters, and we don't exactly know what the hell is going on!" Quatre looked apologetic and got teary eyed. Duo immediately regretted snapping at him. "Hey, Quat, I'm sorry! Look, don't cry, ok? I really didn't mean to snap at you. I'm sorry!" Quatre sniffed.

"No, it's ok Duo, I keep forgetting I'm the only one here with sisters. I'm the one who should be sorry."

Hilde looked up at Sally. "Duo just went from angry to apologetic in like one-and-a-halfseconds," she said.

"Yeah, and Quatre got all upset because he was snapped at," Sally replied.

"Well," Hilde sighed, looking down at the package in her hands, "I think we might want to buy some more of these."

"Hey, Trowa," said Heero, finally speaking up. "Which of these are you using?" Trowa reddened and looked away.

"The pads," he said quietly. "I wasn't quite prepared to do what the directions said for the other thing, despite how uncomfortable these are." Heero and Wufei nodded in silent understanding, while Quatre and Duo kept apologizing to each other in the background. Suddenly Duo gave up on apologizing, and spoke up.

"Hey Hilde, how can we tell if we're about to get our, uh, well, you know?"

"There are lot of signals," Hilde answered. "You might begin to get cramps and pains in your lower abdominal area, you might have a strong craving for certain foods, such as chocolate, um, let's see, there's often vary obvious mood swings. Some people even get headaches, nausea. There are all sorts of things." The guys look positively horrified.

"That sounds horrible," Wufei muttered in shock.

"That sounds like everything that is happening to me!" Duo groaned.

"Hey guys, I have an idea!" Sally said, trying to get their minds off of that topic.

"Well that's new," Wufei said. Sally glared at him.

"Let's go to the park or something. It's a nice day out and it'll get your minds off that topic." Reluctantly, they agreed, and thirty minutes later, the guys found themselves dressed in some of their new clothes, and walking to the park.

Hilde and Sally were walking a little ahead of the guys, and talking quietly. Quatre and Trowa were behind them, walking slowly and discussing various things. Heero, Wufei, and Duo followed behind. The sun was high with no clouds blocking its warmth from pouring down, the trees were beginning to get their leaves again after the long winter season, and it was generally a very pretty day. Duo looked around observantly. There weren't to many people in the park, he noticed. Most kids were probably in school. Every so often someone would jog by listening to music from their portable CD players. An older couple was walking in the distance, hand in hand. Just up ahead there were some college guys fooling around. They were throwing a Frisbee back and forth, while a dog ran in between them trying to intercept it. Their skin glistened with sweat in the sun, and their shirts, which had been discarded earlier, lay off to the side. Next to them were some parents walking with strollers- 'Hold up!' Duo thought, snapping his head back to look at the guys. He stopped in his tracks, causing Wufei to run into him.

"Maxwell! Watch where you're going!" Wufei yelled, despite the fact that HE was the one who wasn't paying attention.

"Oh, uh yeah, sorry Wufei," Duo muttered, not taking his eyes of the guys ahead. Wufei looked at him oddly.

"What are you looking at?" he asked. Following Duo's eyes when he didn't get an answer, he saw what he was looking at. For some reason he couldn't quite place, his heartbeat sped up, and his jaw dropped slightly. "Oh wow," he said quietly. "They are so..." he trailed off, not able to finish the sentence.

"Hot," Duo finished for him. Wufei nodded his head slowly.

"Hold up, what!" Wufei exclaimed, realizing what he had just said. That also brought Duo to his senses.

"I-I, I meant," Duo stuttered, "uh, hot! It's HOT out here." He looked at Wufei, knowing that he didn't believe him, and smiled sheepishly.

"It's this body," Wufei stated. "It has to be, it's the whole affect of being a woman." He and Duo looked at each other.

"I won't tell if you won't," Duo said.

"Agreed," Wufei replied, and they ran to catch up with the others. They'd only gotten a few feet when a bright red Frisbee landed at their feet. Duo bent down to pick it up. When he stood up, he found himself looking into a pair of chocolate brown eyes that almost made him melt on the spot.

"Sorry about that," the guy said with a smile that made his eyes twinkle. "My friend over there has really bad aim," he added and looked over his shoulder at his friend who came walking over. Duo and Wufei stood frozen, and found they couldn't get their mouths to form words. These were those guys they had just been swooning over! A dog barking brought them back to their senses.

"Oh, th-that's ok. Don't worry about it," Duo said, smiling brightly and handing over the Frisbee. Wufei bent down to pet the dog, not knowing what else to do.

"I don't think I've seen you two around here before, what are your names?" the one who had thrown the Frisbee asked. He had bleached blond hair that stood out against his tan skin, and clear blue eyes that told you everything about him.

"M-my name? My name...it's uh, um... my name is...Helen! Yeah, that's right, Helen."

"Helen," the guy with the blue eyes said. "Well my name's Dan. Nice to meet you Helen. This here is Trevor," Dan said, jabbing a thumb in the other guys direction. He then kneeled down to look at Wufei.

"Teddy seems to like you." Wufei looked up startled.

"Teddy?"

"Yeah, that's my dog's name," Dan said, and started scratching the dog behind his ear, causing it to thump it's tail. "So what's your name?"

"My name's...Meiran," Wufei said, almost as if he were in awe.

"Meiran, huh? That's pretty," Dan said, standing up. He offered a hand to Wufei who accepted it after a slight hesitation, and pulled her up.

"So where are you girls from?" asked Trevor. He ran a tan hand through his dark brown hair that matched his eyes.

"We live he-" Duo started, but Wufei cut him off.

"We live in the colonies. We were taking a vacation to the Earth and decided to visit the Sank Kingdom."

"Oh cool, so do you like the Earth? I've only been to the colonies once. I personally don't like them too much, I'd rather have natural sunlight," Trevor said.

"I think it's beautiful here," Duo replied. He couldn't take his eyes off this Trevor guy. He was gorgeous! 'Ack! Stop that thought Duo! You are NOT gay! Right, I will not think thoughts like that.' Duo thought. He looked at Dan again, and noticed his skin was shining in the sunlight because he was still a little sweaty. Duo swallowed unconsciously. 'Ok man, Wufei's right. It's just because I'm in a girl's body, I do NOT like guys. I know I don't, I've never even looked twice at a guy like that before, I mean, I have a girlfriend! Just calm down, and deal with this. I will not think dirty thoughts! I'm a guy! I do not think of other guys like that...But I am a girl right now, so...NO! Stop it! Argh! He is so cute though...AHHH! I am NOT having this conversation with myself!' Duo groaned inwardly. He looked over at Wufei. Apparently while he was having that argument with himself, they had still been talking, because Wufei had said "Sure" to something, and now they were walking away to... an ice cream stand! Duo caught up with Wufei and whispered into his ear, "Wufei! What did you just say yes to?" Wufei looked at him sheepishly.

"Well, they asked if we would like an ice cream cone, and they offered to buy it so I figured..." Duo looked at him in shock. "Ugh, ok! I know I shouldn't have agreed, but I figured it was ok. Besides, I suddenly have this urge for chocolate ice cream..."

"Chocolate!" Duo said, and suddenly remembered why they had come to the park in the first place. "Hey Wufei, where are the others?" Wufei looked around.

"Oh, I completely forgot about them. They're probably fine, don't worry about it.

"Hey! Are you girls coming?" Dan yelled from up ahead. Wufei and Duo looked at each other. Duo shrugged.

"What the heck, let's go," he said, and he and Wufei ran to catch up with the guys.

Heero watched them run off with an amused face. He had seen them talking with the guys, and was kind of shocked that Wufei and Duo had gone with them. 'That's a little out-of-character,' Heero thought. 'Oh well, it must be the affects of being a woman. They'll regret it though...' Heero turned back to the conversation he had been having with Trowa.

"You ok Heero? You kind of spaced out there for a minute." Trowa commented.

"Hmm? Oh yeah, I'm fine. I was just watching Duo and Wufei." Trowa raised an eyebrow.

"They're not with us anymore?"

"No, I just noticed that too. They're getting ice cream with two college guys."

"Oh ok-what!" Trowa turned and looked back where they had just come from. Sure enough, Duo and Wufei were standing at an ice cream stand behind two taller and quite attractive guys. "Hey they're pretty cute." Trowa slapped his hands over his mouth immediately after he spoke and his eyes widened. Did he really just say that? Heero snickered. 'Wait a second! Attractive? Cute? Did I just think and say that? I guess that might explain why they are with them. It's this whole being a woman thing. Ugh...' Trowa thought.

"Why are you guys just standing around?" Sally yelled back at Trowa and Heero. Trowa just looked at her with his eyes still wide, and Heero pointed towards the Ice Cream stand. "Do you want ice cream or something?" Sally asked, not quite getting what they meant, until- "Is that Duo and Wufei!" she asked, her eyes widening. Heero nodded, smiling slightly. "I don't believe it," Sally muttered. "How did they pick up the hot guys around here! They're supposed to be men!" Trowa and Heero were about to nod in agreement, but opted for sweat dropping instead.

* * *

Hehe, well we're getting there. These chapters I can actually stand. My favorites are the ones where they go to the beach, though... :)

-Maxine


	9. Chapter 8

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 8

* * *

Wufei was waving his hand slowly, a somewhat dazed look on his face. His arm suddenly stopped in mid-wave, which didn't really matter, because the guys he had been waving at had disappeared long ago, and the look on his face went from dazed to horrified. Slowly, Wufei turned to the person standing next to him who was having a hard time holding in his laughter.

"Duo," Wufei said slowly. "What the HELL did I just do!" he asked, though he wasn't exactly sure he wanted to know the answer. Duo burst out laughing. If they weren't in public, he would have been rolling on the ground by now. When he saw the look on Wufei's face, Duo tried to stop his laughter, and finally succeeded.

"Well," Duo said, with a smirk on his face. "I think that you just agreed to go on a date with those two guys." Wufei's face drained of color.

"That's what I was afraid of." Snapping his head towardDuo, he said in a questioning voice, "You don't seem too bothered by it."

"By what?"

"By the fact that we're going on a date with GUYS!" Now Duo's face paled.

"Uh, Wufei? Um...how do I say this...well, you see, I'm not...going...on the date." Wufei stared at him for a second, as if he hadn't heard Duo, and then-

"Excuse me?"

"I said I'm not going."

"What do you mean 'you're not going'! You can't just not go!"

"Well, I never said I was going to go. Geez, you were standing right there, didn't you hear me?" From the look on Wufei's face, he could safely guess that he hadn't. "I guess not. You were too busy looking at that Dan guy. Oh well."

"How could you not say yes?" Wufei asked, still not believing Duo.

"Uh, I guess I came to my senses before you did, and I just said I had a boyfriend. They kept trying to get me to go though. I think that basically, they're going to give you a tour since you're 'visiting,' and then you're doing dinner and a movie. It's almost an all day thing."

"Duo, you cannot let me go by myself! How could you do that to me! One girl and two guys, and I'm not even really a girl! Argh!" yelled Wufei, as he proceeded to pull on his hair.

"Whoa! Wufei, calm down! Do you really think that I would leave you all by yourself?"

Wufei looked at him. "You mean you said I couldn't go?" he asked hopefully.

"Ah, well not really. I just said I had a friend who would go with you, that way Trevor would also have a date."

"...You said you had a friend?" he asked flatly. "And just who exactly is this 'friend.'"

Duo suddenly looked nervous. "Well, you see...He doesn't really know he's going yet."

"...He? HE! You said one of the other pilots is going!"

"Yep, and I described what he looks like, so it's not like one of the others can take his place," Duo replied, smiling evilly.

"I can't believe you! I'm not even sure I want to know who you volunteered."

"You're right, you don't want to know. Oh look! There are the others! Come on!" Duo said and began walking to meet them.

"Look, Duo, could you like, NOT tell them about this? Please?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure," Duo said, not really listening. "Hey guys!" Duo called out, and was greeted by several waves, greetings, and querries about where they'd been. "Well," said Duo, preparing to answer the 'where were you?' questions. "We were with these two guys-"

"So we heard," cut in Sally, looking towards Heero who avoided eye contact. Duo continued as if she hadn't said anything.

"And Wufei's going on a date with them!" he finished, smiling widely. Wufei smacked his forehead as the others turned to look at him in shock.

"Thanks a lot, Maxwell!" he hissed.

"You're going on a date with them!" Sally said in disbelief. "Wha...I mean why...well...I mean...you're a guy for crying out loud! Why did you guys say yes to a date with them?"

"Guy," said Duo.

"What?" asked Sally.

"Singular, not plural."

"Duo, what are you talking about?" Hilde asked. Duo sighed in exasperation.

"Sally said 'you GUYS,' and I'm saying she should have said 'GUY' because I'm not going on the date."

"...You're not? You mean Wufei's going by himself? That's not really a good idea..." Sally trailed off.

"Well," said Duo, as he began fidgeting nervously, "he's, uh, well, he's NOT going by himself..." Trowa suddenly got a sinking feeling in his stomach, but Heero asked the question he was thinking for him.

"What do you mean he's not going alone?"

"Well..."

"Oh Duo you didn't..." Hilde said, her eyes widening.

"Did you think I was going to go on a date with another GUY? Hell no! But I couldn't let Wu-man here go all alone with two other guys, so I said we had another friend who could go."

"Wufei, why did you even say yes?" asked Quatre. Wufei blushed deeply, and Duo answered for him.

"He wasn't thinking straight. I just happened to snap out of it before him, and I said I already had a boyfriend." Quatre nodded in understanding.

"I still want to know who you so thoughtfully volunteered to go on this date," Heero said. Duo scratched his head sheepishly.

"Well, I told them that she had brown hair-" Quatre let out the breath he had been holding and silently muttered a thanks to God. Trowa and Heero, however, both tensed up and clenched their fists. Duo swallowed nervously. "And then I said that her name was...was...I said her name was..."

"Come on already!" Sally and Hilde shouted, kind of enjoying this scene. Duo swallowed again and paled.

"IsaidhernamewasMary," Duo blurted out really fast and then started backing away. Trowa relaxed, and stole a glance at Heero, whose face drained of color, and then gained it back again in a nice shade of red. Silently (as always), Trowa began edging away from Heero who was now seething in anger.

"YOU WHAT!" he shouted, lunging at Duo. Duo neatly sidestepped him, and then took off for...well, he just aimlessly took off, with Heero right on his tail, er...braid. Yanking his braid out of the Perfect Soldier's reach, Duo shouted back over his shoulder:

"Come on, Heero! You really don't want to do this, not in public! Imagine how stupid we must look! Especially since we're girls!" Duo stopped running abruptly, which Heero had totally not expected so he therefore collided with him and they went tumbling on the grass for a while. Soon they were all out wrestling each other, each trying to gain the upper hand. Duo wasn't putting up much of a fight however, and Heero was soon straddling him with his hands around his neck to pin him to the ground. "Ack! Heero! Can't breathe! Let go!" Somewhat reluctantly, Heero released his neck, but still held him to the ground.

"Why'd you stop running?" Heero asked, breathing heavily. That little scramble had him out of breath, which was somewhat surprising, but he ignored it for the time being. Duo, also breathing heavily, answered.

"Well for starters, we're in public. Now if we were still guys, I wouldn't have been so concerned, but unless you wanted to make it seem like we're two actresses from Baywatch or something, I don't really think it's a good idea to go running through the park like that, in tank tops like these!" Heero's eyes widened, and he abruptly got off Duo.

"Oi, I guess your right...unfortunately," Heero muttered. Duo sat up and brushed himself off.

"Of course I'm right. I'm the great Shinigami!"

"Yeah, sure," Heero said. Suddenly remembering why he was chasing Duo in the first place, Heero turned back to him.

"How could you? You said I would go! Any of the others, and you chose me! Why? Quatre would make a better girl any day."

"Hey!" shouted Quatre defensively, as he and the others finally caught up to Heero and Duo.

"So why don't you just say you can't go?" Hilde asked, as she plopped down on the grass beside Duo. Duo turned to look at her.

"He can't do that! As guys, we should know, well, I don't how many people Heero has ever asked out, so he might not know, but I know that one of the worst feelings is to be stood up on your first date with a girl. That, or having her cancel for no apparent reason."

"Ok, I guess I could understand that," Hilde said.

"I can't believe I'm going to go on a date with a GUY," Heero muttered.

"You mean you're really going to go?" Wufei asked, turning to Heero with hopeful eyes. Heero slowly nodded his head. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!" Wufei said, turning and hugging Heero.

"Ack, Wufei! Stop it! Get off, get off, get OFF!" Heero shouted, not really expecting that.

"Oh, hehe, sorry," Wufei said, blushing slightly.

"Well, I think," Trowa started, crouching down to try and look Heero in the eye. Heero however, kept looking away. "-that Heero is actually looking forward to this."

"I am not!" Heero shouted, though he felt his face heat up. 'Ugh, damn it!' Heero thought. Trowa chuckled slightly.

"Sure Heero, you were only watching them the whole afternoon."

"I was just wondering where they had gone off to," Heero said, knowing that Trowa didn't believe him.

"Guys," said Hilde, cutting into the conversation. Everyone looked at her. "It's getting dark, and the girls will be wondering where we've been, so we should probably be going back."

"Yeah," Duo agreed, nodding his head. "It's probably time for dinner, I'm starving!"

"When aren't you hungry?" Heero asked, as he stood up and brushed himself off. Duo stuck his tongue out at him. Heero glared in return.

"Man," said Hilde, as they stated walking back to the car. "The others are gonna be shocked at all that's happened today. I mean first, Trowa gets to experience one of the joys of being a woman that no other man has-"

"You say that like it's a good thing," muttered Trowa. Hilde pointedly ignored him.

"Then Wufei and Duo start flirting with these two hot college guys, and Wufei and Heero end up getting a date with them. When is the Big Date anyway?"

"Uhh...you know, I have no idea," said Wufei, stopping abruptly.

"Don't worry, I heard everything," Duo reassured. "It's tomorrow at 3:30. You're supposed to meet them at the hotel near Relena's house, where you are supposedly staying since you're visiting the earth. I think they're going to show you around for about two hours. You know, all the main sites in the city. Then they were going to try and get dinner reservations for 5:30, and you're going to a movie after that."

"I have to do all that?" Heero asked in a voice not quite his own, beside the fact it was a girl's.

"Oh man," groaned Wufei, running a hand through his hair.

"Wow, they must really like you! Dinner and a movie! That's so romantic," said Hilde dreamily.

"Hey!" Duo said. "You and I go on nice dates."

"Did I say anything about the dates we go on? I don't think so. I was just saying that was romantic, that's all."

"...oh," Duo said after a second.

"Come on guys!" Sally said as she started walking again, making sure the rest would follow. "We need to get home."

* * *

Filler chapter...bah... lol. Onto the next!

-Maxine


	10. Chapter 9

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 9

* * *

"WHAT!" shouted Relena, her sea blue eyes widening in shock. Midii froze and Dorothy's spoon stopped halfway to her mouth.

"You're what?" Dorothy hissed in disbelief. Wufei and Heero cowered back, and Duo took the opportunity to speak for them.

"They're going on a date."

"And with two hot college guys, go figure," added Hilde.

"But...how...they're...you're...I mean," Relena sputtered incoherently. She took a deep breath before continuing. "Ok, first off, YOU'RE GUYS! How could you have possibly said yes to other guys?"

"I didn't say yes," Heero quickly said, regaining his composure. "Wufei was the one to agree to it. I just got tossed in as an extra because Duo didn't want to go."

"I didn't want to go either," Wufei stated, the remains of his pride picking up. "I just...wasn't...thinking straight." Relena sat down heavily.

"I don't believe it," she muttered.

"I've got other news you probably won't believe either," Sally threw in, smiling slightly and catching Hilde's eye. Hilde smiled mischievously.

"Oh yeah, Wufei's not the only one whose body is acting feminine," she said, looking over to Trowa who was oblivious to what she and Sally were talking about.

"What do you mean?" Dorothy asked. Both Hilde and Sally were staring at Trowa, who still hadn't noticed anything.

"Trowa," started Hilde. That got his attention. He turned to see Hilde and Sally staring at him with mischievous smiles on their faces, and he suddenly knew what they were talking about. Eyes widening, Trowa began to shake his head, silently begging them not to say anymore. They were not that merciful. "...just got his period today," Hilde finished, watching Trowa's cheeks attain a rosy red color as he glared at her. Relena and Midii's jaws dropped in shock, and Dorothy smirked.

"You're kidding," Midii said as she picked her jaw up off the floor.

Trowa shook his head. "No, they're not, unfortunately."

"Does anyone else have theirs?" Relena asked, looking around at the other guys who started shaking their heads.

"Well, not yet anyway," said Duo miserably. "But I have a feeling it's coming."

"Well, you're not getting any sympathy from me," Hilde said as she took a seat at the table. "I've been dealing with it since I was ten."

"Ten? Really? Wow, I got mine at thirteen," Midii said.

"Ten, that's nothing, I was nine," piped up Sally.

"Oh, that sucks. I was twelve," added Relena.

"Same here," sad Dorothy.

"Okaaaay, on to better things," said Duo, slightly uncomfortable with the topic of discussion. "What are you guys going to wear tomorrow?" he asked Wufei and Heero, both of whom shrugged in response.

"No idea," said Heero flatly.

"Are you going to a nice restaurant?" asked Relena, motioning for the others to sit down around the table.

"Pretty nice," Duo answered for them, taking a seat next to Hilde.

"I say skirt and blouse," said Relena.

"An above the knees skirt," supplied Dorothy, spooning up more yogurt.

"Definitely. And if it's warm, you can wear a tank top," added Midii.

"We can lend you some jewelry," said Hilde.

"Yeah, Relena has a lot of nice stuff," Dorothy said.

"Um, if I could interrupt for a second," Quatre said, standing up suddenly. "Is there anymore of that?" he asked, pointing to the yogurt container in Dorothy's hand. She looked down at it and nodded.

"Yeah, there's some more in the refrigerator, and there's other flavors."

"Ok, thanks. Does anyone else want any?" Quatre asked, heading towards the kitchen. Sally, Heero, Duo, Trowa, and Wufei raised their hands.

"No thanks, but could you get me an apple or something?" Hilde asked Quatre, who nodded in reply.

"Could you get me another one?" asked Dorothy. "And make sure it's key lime pie."

"I'd like one too actually. Strawberry please," said Relena. Quatre nodded again, and disappeared into the kitchen. He returned again, with an armful of various types of yogurt, and a handful of spoons. After handing them out, Quatre sat down and it was quiet for a few minutes, before Hilde spoke up again.

"I wonder if they'll try to kiss you goodnight..." Heero and Wufei promptly choked on their yogurt, and Dorothy and Sally snickered at them.

Finally recovering, Wufei spoke with wide eyes. "You don't think they would, do you?"

"I don't know, you tell me. You're a guy. Would you kiss a girl younger than you on your fist date?" Hilde asked.

"I've never really dated before," Wufei said, blushing slightly.

"Me neither," Heero said. Duo smacked his forehead.

"You guys are pathetic," he muttered. "That's kinda funny though, your first date, and you're a girl."

"It's not my first date," Wufei said sharply. "I just haven't been on many, that's all."

"It would be really funny if they got you in bed the first night-" Hilde spoke up again, smiling mischievously. Heero choked on his food once again, but Wufei just shook his head.

"Won't happen," he said strongly.

"-and then you might get pregnant or something. Oh, now THAT would be a good revenge. Having you go through the pain of childbirth." Hilde's eyes now had a strange glint to them, and the others slowly backed away from her.

"How would you know about the pain of childbirth?" Duo asked Hilde, still looking at her oddly. She looked up at him.

"It's just...common knowledge I guess. You read about it."

Heero looked extremely worried now. "That wouldn't happen,"he said quickly. "I mean, we're only women for two weeks. We can't get pregnant."

"Are you planning on sleeping with one of them?" Wufei asked Heero, looking at him skeptically. "Because that would be weird. Your first time and you'd be a woman."

"No I am not planning on sleeping with them! And who said it would be my first time?" Heero said, sticking up for himself a little. Relena's eyes widened slightly at that.

"I bet it would be," Wufei stated, glaring at Heero who glared right back at him.

"Well, it would probably be your first time too," Heero said, sitting up smugly when Wufei blushed slightly.

"Actually, it wouldn't be, so there!" said Wufei, sticking his tongue out at Heero who's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Really?" asked Sally from across the table. Wufei blushed more, suddenly remembering that the others were listening also.

"Wouldn't be my first time," Duo said while smirking, which earned him a swat on the back of the head from Hilde, who blushed slightly. Wufei ignored him, and answered Sally instead.

"Yes, really. Why? You don't believe me?"

"Do we know her?" asked Dorothy, now interested in the conversation.

"No," answered Wufei casually, still eating his yogurt.

"Was it before the war?" Relena asked. Wufei nodded.

"Wow, that's awfully young Wufei," Quatre said. Wufei blushed again.

"Well...we were allowed to." This earned him some weird looks from the others. "I mean, well, we were married," Wufei finished quietly. The others stared at him in disbelief again.

"Oh Wufei, I'm sorry," Quatre said, guessing what had happened to her.

"No, its ok. It was a long time ago. I didn't really know her all that long anyway."

"What was her name?" Relena asked quietly. Wufei smiled ironically.

"Meiran. Also known as...Nataku."

"Seriously? Cool! That's who you named your Gundam after, right?" asked Duo.

"Yep," answered Wufei. It was quiet for a couple more minutes, and then Dorothy decided to break the silence.

"It wouldn't be my first time. Not that I would ever sleep with someone on the first date anyway." Quatre stared at her with wide eyes, but she ignored him.

"Wouldn't be my first time either," Midii said, not that she sounded happy about that.

"It'd be my first," Quatre said quietly, lowering his eyes.

"Same," Trowa said.

"Me too," Sally said cheerfully. The rest looked at Relena expectantly, who was looking off into space.

"What about you Relena?" Dorothy asked her.

"Hmm? Oh, well it'd be my first time too, I guess."

"You guess?" asked Duo teasingly.

"Well, I know that it would be. Sorry, I was just thinking about something that happened before the war." The others looked at her questioningly, especially Heero. She chuckled. "You know, just because I believe in Pacifism and all that, and my father was a vice foreign minister and what not, it doesn't mean that I'm some little goodie goodie. I was just thinking about the parties we used to have at the academy," Relena said, still looking off into the distance.

"And? What happened at them?" asked Duo.

"Well, aside from the dance parties that were often held," Relena made a point to glance at Heero when she said this, who quickly looked away, "there were those families who were not as wealthy, so those kids would just have your normal birthday parties. The ones where you'd play games and stuff."

"What sort of games?" Duo asked again, playing right along with Relena. Relena smirked.

"Oh you know. Twister, Truth or Dare...Spin the Bottle...Seven Minutes in Heaven, all sorts of teenage games." She shook her head quickly, the look Heero gave her not going unnoticed. "Anyhow, there used to be this one guy who I had a major crush on when I was...fourteen. I just remember my friends always daring us to do stuff together. And we always got chosen for that Seven Minutes in Heaven thing. He evidently liked me back."

"There's not too much you can do in seven minutes though," Trowa stated. Duo and Hilde snorted.

"You wanna bet?" Relena asked, smiling slightly. "Anyway, that's the farthest I've ever been with anyone, I was just thinking about it."

"Hey guys, you want to know something?" Sally asked, standing up from the table. The others looked at her questioningly, but she only looked at the guys. "You just had what is commonly known as a 'girl talk.' Congrats! You are progressing nicely as women," she said teasingly. The other girls laughed as the guys' eyes widened and their heads dropped down onto the table with a loud thud.

& & & &

Heero crept stealthily down the hall in the darkness. His destination? The bathroom. Damn women and the monthly thing they went through. At least it had happened at a time that would allow him to make sure no one else found out about it. Or so he thought. Everyone else had gone to bed long ago. Heero stared through the darkness as he tried to make his way to the door. Finally reaching his destination, Heero glanced around briefly to make sure no one else had woken up, before putting his hand on the doorknob. To his complete and utter surprise and horror, there was already another hand there. Heero's eyes widened as he snapped his head around. He suddenly found himself staring into another pair of eyes inches away from his own, causing him to yelp and back up quickly. In the process of backing up, Heero managed to trip over his own feet, sending him flying to the ground, and during that short trip, he successfully swept the other person in the hallway off their feet, thus causing a human dog pile on the floor. After much confusion and cussing, the two managed to untangle themselves. Then, after looking around to make sure that no one else had woken up, Heero focused his attention on the person in front of him who was currently rubbing the back of his head. Squinting his eyes, he could finally make out who it was.

"Duo?" he whispered.

"Ugh, yeah... Heero?" came the reply.

"What the hell are you doing up?"

"Well, I could ask YOU the same thing." Heero was glad for the darkness now because it covered the blush that spread across his face.

"I had to use the bathroom," Heero said lamely. Even in the darkness, he could tell Duo was looking at him doubtfully.

"Yeah, sure, and so do I. So if you will excuse me." With that, Duo stood up and entered the bathroom. Heero stood up also and leaned up against the wall beside the door. Minutes passed, and Duo still hadn't come out. Wondering what was taking him so long, Heero knocked lightly on the door.

"Duo," he whispered through the door. "What are you doing? Hurry up!" The door cracked open, and Duo looked at Heero through the crack.

"Uh...could you come in here for a second, please?" Heero raised an eyebrow, and Duo rolled his eyes at him. "Please?" Heero sighed and pushed the door the rest of the way open. After stepping in and closing it behind him, Heero turned to look at Duo.

"What?" Heero asked irritably. Duo smiled sheepishly.

"Uh, you wouldn't happen to know where the girls keep the uh, 'feminine products,' would you?" Heero's eyes widened.

"You mean you don't know?" Duo shook his head. "Damn," Heero muttered. Duo smiled brightly.

"I knew you didn't have to just go to the bathroom," Duo said. Heero blushed despite himself. "Well, I guess we'll have to go find out," said Duo as he walked back out into the hallway.

"Wait! Where are you going?" Heero asked as he followed him.

"Hilde's room. She'll know where they are. I bet they did this on purpose, so we would have to ask them and then they would know that we had it." Heero nodded in agreement. Duo pushed Hilde's door open and peeked into the room. She was still sound asleep. Duo tiptoed over to her bed, with Heero following him. "Hey," he whispered into her ear. He was rewarded with a groan. "Hiiiilde. Wake up Hilde. Hilde babe, it's time to get up," Duo continued, tapping lightly on her shoulder. Two eyes blinked wearily at him.

"Duo, what d'ya want," Hilde asked rolling over onto her side, only to find herself staring into Prussian blue eyes. "Heero?" she questioned.

"Hilde, we need your help. Heero and I both hit that time of the month." That woke her up.

"Now? In the middle of the night? That sucks. Well, let's go get Relena."

"Relena? Why?" Heero asked quickly. Hilde glanced over at him and smiled.

"Because she knows where the stuff is. I gave it to her to hide- uh, I mean hold," Hilde answered sheepishly.

"Told ya," Duo said, looking at Heero who glared in return.

Hilde led the way down the hall to Relena's room, where she opened the door and proceeded to wake Relena up. Groaning somewhat, Relena finally sat up and looked over at the two guys-turned-girls who were standing in the light of her doorway, both wearing embarrassed expressions. Smiling, Relena climbed out of bed and stumbled over to her closet. After digging around for a few minutes, she emerged wearing a victorious grin, holding the two different packages in her hand.

"Which one?" she questioned. Both boys pointed to the one in her right hand. Chuckling, she put the tampons back in her closet. "Well, if these get too uncomfortable, all you have to do is ask," Relena said, still laughing quietly. Hilde laughed with her.

Stifling a yawn, Hilde started walking out of the room. "Now if you will excuse me," she said, "I have to go to school tomorrow, so I'm going back to bed." Duo followed her out of the room, and Relena climbed back into bed, mumbling a goodnight.

"Who's staying home tomorrow?" Duo asked Hilde.

"Relena," she replied, the groan from Heero not going unnoticed. "See you guys tomorrow." With that, Hilde entered the confines of her room, leaving Duo and Heero staring at each other in the hall.

& & & &

Sometime close to noon the next morning, the guys found themselves finally waking up, which was odd, because usually they would have been up about four hours before that. Shrugging it off, the group trudged downstairs for breakfast, or lunch actually.

"Ugh, I can't believe I'm still tired," Trowa muttered, running a hand through his hair.

"Hn." Surprisingly, this reply came from Duo. Heero just nodded his head in agreement. Lifting his head up from the table, Duo decided to add more to his previous response. "I feel like crap. I just wanted to let you all know that, not that any of you cared." Trowa looked at him oddly.

"You ok?" he asked. Duo glared at him.

"Didn't I JUST say that I felt like crap? Helloooo! Anyone home in there? Geez, the nerve of some people."

"Well, excuuuuse me!" Trowa snapped, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Don't worry about him, Trowa," a fully dressed and awake Relena said as she walked into the room. "Duo's just in a bad mood because he's going through the same thing you are." Trowa perked up at that.

"Oh really?" Turning his attention back to Duo, Trowa continued. "Poor wittle Duo-kins got an unexpected visitor. Poor baby. Ha! You get no sympathy from me."

Duo snorted. "And to think I was actually worried about you yesterday. What was I thinking?"

"Both of you shut up," Heero growled, backed up by Wufei who was nodding in agreement.

"Says who?" Duo growled in return, turning to glare at Heero.

"Yeah!" said Trowa, also looking at him.

"Says me! Got a problem with that?" Heero replied. Relena casually walked over to Heero and put her hand on his shoulder.

Bending down so that she was level with the faces of Trowa and Duo, she said nonchalantly, "Don't mind Heero either. He's in the same boat as Duo." Standing up and smiling, she patted Heero's shoulder, which was attached to a flaming red face. "It's ok Heero, I understand," Relena finished while smirking. The others at the table laughed, as Heero sat there blushing.

"Thank you, Relena," Heero grounded out sarcastically. She only smiled in return.

"Where's Sally?" Wufei asked, keeping his eyes on his food.

"She had some work to do, she's coming over around 1:30," Relena replied. "And as of right now, Heero and Wufei, you both have about three hours to get ready for your date. Call me if you need any help." Heero snorted.

"Like we need THREE hours to get ready."

"I'm going to go take a shower," Wufei said, getting up abruptly, and walking towards the bathrooms. Heero watched him leave.

"I'm going to go watch T.V," was all he said before walking into the living room.

Almost an hour later, Wufei came downstairs, dressed in a pair of jean shorts and a yellow spaghetti-strapped shirt. His hair was done in pigtails, and he generally looked pretty cute. Ignoring the looks the others gave him, he walked into the room and plopped down onto the couch by Quatre, who was also dressed in white shorts and a sky blue V-neck tank top. He had simply left his hair down. Sitting at his feet was Trowa, wearing black capris and an oversized forest green sweater. His hair was pulled back into a ponytail. Aside from Relena, the other occupants in the room, Duo and Heero, were still lounging around in their pajamas.

"Heero," Wufei said quietly. Heero looked at him. Sighing, he said, "We have about two hours." Heero nodded and got up to leave. He passed Sally in the hallway, who had just arrived. She smiled at his disgruntled appearance, but didn't say anything.

Waltzing into the living room, Sally announced, "G'morning, everyone! Actually, it's more like afternoon, but oh well." She sat down on the couch next to Wufei who scooted over to make room for her. "Ready for your date?" Sally asked him. Wufei looked at her out of the corner of his eye.

"Does it LOOK like I'm ready?" he asked, and then sighed again. "I'll never be ready for it."

"Oh come on, don't be nervous! It'll go fine."

"I don't want to go. I'm a man. It's an injustice that I should have to go," Wufei grumbled.

"You brought it upon yourself," Sally replied. Wufei glared at her. Soon after, he snapped his head to the staircase as he heard his name being screamed.

"WUFEI!"

"What, Yuy?" Heero appeared at the top of the staircase, a towel wrapped around his form, and water dripping from his still wet hair.

"Are you going to get ready or not? I'm getting dressed now, and I want to know what you're going to wear."

"Oh yeah, coming." Wufei got up and began to ascend the stairs.

"I think I'll go help them," Sally whispered to the others who smiled at her. She then followed Wufei upstairs.

"Damn it, Yuy. What room are you in?" asked Wufei as he walked down the hall.

"Mine. Whose room did you think I was in?" came the reply. Wufei walked intothe room, only to get hit in the face with a shirt. Scowling and throwing it onto the floor, Wufei looked around the room trying to locate Heero. His eyes widened. There were clothes _everywhere_. They had just been thrown carelessly around, new and old. Wufei found the reason behind the mess standing in the closet. Every so often he would pick something up, look at it, then scowl and toss it over his shoulder.

"Heero, what on earth are you doing?" Wufei asked with wide eyes. Heero stepped out of the closet and put his hands on his hips. He still had the towel wrapped around his body. His face was flushed and strands of wet hair clung to it. It briefly crossed Wufei's mind the he was thankful to be in a woman's body so he wasn't affected by this sight.

"I don't have anything to wear," Heero stated, before turning back to his closet. Wufei lifted an eyebrow.

"Oh?" he questioned. "I can understand that there is nothing in your closet to wear, but that's because it's all thrown around the room," Wufei said sarcastically. Heero glared at him before walking over to his dresser. A quiet knocking was heard, and Sally poked her head into the room.

"Need any help, guys?" she questioned as she looked around the room. "Oh my..." Heero turned his glare on her, but not for long.

"Ugh, yes!" he said, and plopped down onto the side of the bed, burying his face in his hands. "I have nothing to wear."

"Oh come on," Sally said as she walked into the room. "All these new clothes we just bought, and you can't find anything to wear? That's a typical first date statement." Heero glanced up at her through his hands.

"Are you going to stand there and insult me or help?" he questioned gruffly. Sally chuckled, and picked up a skirt from the ground.

"No..." she decided after looking it over, and tossed it over her shoulder. "Nuh-uh," she said, looking at another shirt. Then her eyes landed on a shirt thrown over the edge of the bed. Sally walked over and picked it up. "Here we go. Now we just have to find something to wear under it...hm...Wufei!" Sally exclaimed, startling the Chinese pilot. "Go get that skirt we got Trowa, you know, the short, black one. If you can't find it, then ask Trowa where it is." Wufei nodded and walked swiftly out of the room. A few minutes later he returned, holding the skirt in his hand, with Trowa trailing behind. "Thanks!" Sally said, and then shoved the skirt and blouse she had picked up at Heero. "Go try these on," she commanded, pushing the bewildered teen towards the bathroom. Heero emerged minutes later, and Sally looked him over. "Ok, I like the outfit, but I think it would look better on Wufei. Why don't you let him wear that, and I'll find you something else to wear." Heero, looking annoyed, trudged back into the bathroom, returning a few minutes later wearing the towel again.

"Sally, what about this?" Trowa said, picking up a cobalt blue skirt from the ground. Sally looked it over, and a smile spread slowly over her face.

"Perfect! It'll bring out his eye color. Ok," she said, taking the dress from Trowa. "Both of you go change. And hurry up!"

"Woma-I mean, Sally," Wufei corrected himself, "We still have like an hour and a half, we do not need to hurry!"

"Yeah you do, we still have to do your hair and make-up."

"Make-up?" Wufei asked, eyes widening, before Trowa shoved him into the bathroom.

Half an hour later, Heero and Wufei sat in front of the vanity in Relena's room, eyeing the various tubes and bottles warily. Both were dressed, and their hair was in the process of being done. Heero was decked out in shimmering cobalt blue skirt that stopped inches above his knees. Two straps held up the dress, and the front of it dipped down, showing a little more cleavage than Heero wanted it too. The dress wasn't tight, but it clung to his curves, leaving little to the imagination. The bottom of it flared out, making it the type of dress that twirls up when you spin. Overall, it was fairly simple, yet classy. Next to him, Wufei wore a two-piece outfit. The skirt was the same length as Heero's, and looked basically the same as the bottom half as his dress did, except Wufei's was midnight black instead of cobalt blue. On top of it he wore a black, three-quarter sleeved shirt, which had a wide and low neck line. On it was a gold dragon whose tail curved down around Wufei's waist. The dragon's head came up and rested upon Wufei's breast. It fit the Chinese pilot perfectly. Finishing off the outfit, Wufei, or rather Sally, had chosen gold jewelry to match the dragon, while Heero was wearing small diamonds, courtesy of Relena. Currently, Heero's hair was being piled on top of his head in a French twist, but instead of tucking all the hair under, it was being curled and pinned down. Two extra pieces framed his face and had also been curled. (A/N: Do you know how weird it is to be describing dresses and all, yet I'm still using "he" and "his" instead of "she" and "hers'. Oh well.) Wufei's hair, though not as fancy, still looked good. He simply had French-braided pigtails down the sides of his head, but it seemed to fit the outfit. It would have been nice if they could have worn earrings, but seeing as their ears were not pierced, that couldn't be helped.

Pinning the last piece of hair down for Heero, Sally exclaimed, "Finished! So, what do you think?" Heero scrutinized his appearance in the mirror. He had to admit, Sally had done a good job. He lifted his eyes to look at her, when he noticed that she was focusing on something else. His eyes widened as he realized what it was. "So, are you guys ready?" Sally asked, holding up the blush in her hand. As if preparing for a major battle, both Heero and Wufei simultaneously gulped and nodded. Wufei was watching Sally's every move, as if the little brush she was holding might jump out of her hands and attack him or something, when suddenly he heard something that sounded suspiciously like laughter attempting to be stifled. Turning his head to glance at Trowa, his suspicions were confirmed.

Trowa bit his bottom lip as soon as Wufei turned to look at him. "Sorry," he mumbled. Wufei only glared at him.

"Ready?" Sally asked again.

"No," Wufei grumbled.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad," Sally reassured.

"I don't want to wear make-up. Men do not wear make-up."

"Yes well, men don't usually wear dresses, stockings, jewelry, or bras either, and yet here you are, decked out in all of the above." Wufei glared at her. "Look, I'm not going to put a lot on you, just enough to highlight certain features."

"Well, fine, but only if you make Barton wear some."

"What? No!" Trowa cried.

"Why should Trowa wear any, he's not going anywhere," Sally said, confused.

"I don't care. If he doesn't wear any, then neither do I."

"Geez Wufei! You are so...ugh, never mind. Fine. Trowa, get over here!" Trowa stared at her like she was sprouting wings, but grudgingly walked over.

Only about fifteen minutes later, all three boys sat staring at themselves in the mirror. The change was obvious. Though they couldn't see the make-up because it was applied so lightly, it was obvious they had it on. And as Sally had said, it only highlighted certain facial features.

Bending down to their level, Sally whispered, "I do good work, don't I?" She received vague nods from them. Looking down at her watch, Sally said, "Well, it's 2:45 now. If the date is at 3:30, then we should probably leave here in about fifteen minutes. That gives you a little while to relax."

"Uh...Sally?" Sally looked at Heero. "We still need shoes," he said, pointing at his feet.

"Oh! That's right, I almost forgot. Um, let's see," said Sally, looking around. "Heero, you can wear Hilde's silver sandals. The ones that clasp around her ankle."

"You mean those sparkly ones?" Sally nodded. "Ok."

"And you're lucky, they don't have platforms or heels. Wufei, you want to try my platform shoes? The black slip-on ones?" Wufei shrugged as a reply, and Sally went to get them. "They'll add two to three inches to your height," she said when she returned. Wufei slipped them on stood up. "Of course the first couple of times, you might find them hard to-" Taking a step, Wufei wobbled a bit and promptly fell over sideways. "...walk in," Sally finished, as she helped Wufei up.

"You could have told me that BEFORE I put them on," Wufei grumbled, as he slowly tried to take another step...and failed. "ARGH! Damn it! How hard can it be to walk in these things!"

"Well at least they're not high heels," Sally said, smiling lightly. A few minutes and several failed attempts later, Wufei finally got the hang of the shoes, and was able to walk pretty well in them. "Well guys, let's go show you off to the others," said Sally. Taking a step back, Sally looked Wufei and Heero over once more. "Damn I'm good," she said to herself, before leading the way downstairs.

& & & &

After all the fussing from the girls about how good they looked, Heero and Wufei were only too glad to finally leave for their date. As soon as they actually left the house though, the feeling left and they both had a sudden urge to run back inside the house and hide under a bed somewhere. Sally, who was taking them to the hotel where they would meet Trevor and Dan, didn't allow them to go anywhere as she herded them to the car. Duo trailed behind. It was decided that he would go to help introduce "Mary" to the guys. They arrived at the hotel around 3:15, giving them some time to sit and relax. Sally waited out in the car to make it look as if they were really staying in the hotel.

All too soon, 3:25 rolled around, and two hot guys pulled up in a silver Mercedes outside the hotel.

"Hey guys," Duo whispered to Wufei and Heero, smiling brightly. "They're here. You ready?" All shyness seemed to have left him, since he wasn't going on the date, and he had once again returned to his normal, cheery self. Duo didn't receive a verbal answer from either of them, but Heero's eyes widening and Wufei's complexion paling confirmed they were NOT ready. 'Oh well, too late for them to be backing out now,' Duo thought to himself, his smile widening. "Come on, stand up!" he urged the two, not realizing that both of their legs seemed to have been turned to Jell-O and surely would not support them.

'Geez, do all women feel like this on their first date with someone?' Wufei thought vaguely as he attempted to stand, letting out a huge sigh of relief as he realized that his legs did indeed support him. Wufei looked over to the doors, where Duo was currently letting the guys in babbling the whole time.

"Hey Dan! Trevor! How's it going? Sorry I couldn't come today, but you know how it is. But don't worry; the girl taking my place is a knockout. You'll love her!" Duo babbled, oblivious to the fact that both men were staring at him in an odd, yet affectionate way with small smiles on their faces. "Come on! I'll introduce you to her. Her name's Mary, in case you forgot. But just so that you know, she's really shy at first. Wu-Meiran," Duo caught himself, "is also sort of shy. Don't mind it though; they'll come around before the night is done. Oh! You got them flowers!" he exclaimed, finally noticing the bouquet that each of them held. "That's so sweet!" Trevor chuckled, almost causing Duo to melt on the spot as that annoying feminine part of him started acting up.

"Yeah, hello to you to Helen," Trevor said, smiling the whole time. "You seem really happy for some reason. Can I ask why?"

"Oohhh, my boyfriend just called," Duo quickly made up. "I miss him a lot. I can't wait to see him again. Actually, we leave tomorrow night," Duo said loud enough to make sure Heero and Wufei heard him.

"Aw, that's a shame," Dan said. "We'll have to make the best of today then." Looking over to where Wufei was standing, his eyes widened. "Wow, Meiran. You look...breathtakingly beautiful." Wufei couldn't help the light blush that spread across his face that only deepened when Dan handed the flowers to her. "Here, these are for you."

"Thank you," Wufei said slowly, looking up and giving a small smile. Duo watched the exchange, and smirked. Then, grabbing Trevor's hand, Duo dragged him over to Heero, who was watching Wufei talk with Dan.

"Ahem," Duo coughed, getting Heero's attention. "Mary, this is Trevor. Trevor, Mary." Trevor stared at Heero through wide eyes. After several seconds, Heero started squirming under his gaze.

Shaking his head slightly, Trevor said, "Sorry. I was trying to think of something to say, but all the corny pick-up lines left my brain when I saw you. But I guess that's a good thing isn't?" Chuckling, Trevor held out his hand. "Like your friend over here said, I'm Trevor." Heero stared at his hand for a moment, brief flashbacks of Zechs holding out his hand like this over two years ago flashing through his mind. Lifting his hand, his grasped Trevor's in a firm grip.

"It's nice to finally meet you. Last night I had to keep reminding Helen over here that she DID have a boyfriend, because she kept talking about you," Heero said, smiling as a blush spread Trevor's face and Duo's, who also glared at him. Trevor laughed.

"Believe me," Trevor said, lifting Heero's hand to his mouth and barely brushing his lips against his knuckles. "The pleasure is all mine. These are for you, by the way," he finished, thrusting the flowers in Heero's direction. Heero took them gingerly.

"Thanks," he breathed out, staring at the flowers in awe. "Is it ok if I give them to Helen for now? I don't want them to get ruined this afternoon."

"Yeah, that's fine. Actually, it's probably a good idea."

"Meiran!" Heero called out, getting Wufei's attention. "Give your flowers to Helen. She'll put them in some water while we're gone." A few minutes later, Duo, holding both bouquets, was waving to the others who were climbing into the car getting ready to leave.

"Bye guys! Have fun! Remember, don't stay out past 12, and always be safe!" Heero and Wufei glared at Duo once before leaving, picking up the underlying meaning of "be safe." Duo chuckled to himself as they drove off. 'I wonder if they'll survive,' he thought. 'That is a NICE car though...' Duo smiled and walked back to Sally's car.

* * *

More chapters coming soon!

-Maxine


	11. Chapter 10

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 10

* * *

Everything started out ok, even if it was a little boring. Dan and Trevor made good tour guides. Everything they said was interesting, but since Wufei and Heero actually lived in the kingdom, they'd already seen it all before. Despite that, they managed to act as if they were having a really good time touring the city. It wasn't until they left to go to the restaurant they had reservations at that Heero and Wufei realized exactly what they were doing, and it hit them full force. They, two male Gundam pilots, were going, well, currently on, a DATE with two other guys. Sure they knew this already, but after they really thought about it, the whole situation seemed a lot worse than it was, and it made acting like they were having a great time a whole lot harder. Once they got to the restaurant, Wufei took the first available opportunity to talk to Heero. Using one of the lines that he usually hated women saying, Wufei caught Heero's eye and excused them from the table.

"Um...Mary, I need to use the restroom, would you go with me?" Wufei asked, sending Heero a silent message through his eyes. Heero understood and immediately stood up.

"We'll be right back," he mumbled to Trevor, following Wufei to the - he cringed -Lady's Room. Of course, he had to remind Wufei that that was where they had to go now after he had started heading towards the Men's Room. Scowling, Wufei pushed open the door, and abruptly closed it again.

"My God! It's so crowded in there! You'd think they were having an autograph signing session of the world's most beautiful men or something," Wufei said with wide eyes. Heero looked at him in amusement before brushing past him.

"It can't be that bad," he said pushing open the door. "On second thought, never mind," Heero muttered, stepping back. Wufei opened his mouth, but before any words could get past it, both he and Heero had to jump back against the wall as a particularly large group of women filed out of the bathroom.

"Well, that cleared it out," Wufei said, finally able to walk into the bathroom.

"Ok, so what did you want?" Heero asked, leaning up against the sinks.

"Um...I don't remember," Wufei admitted sheepishly. Heero rolled his eyes at him. "Oh wait, I think I just wanted to get away from the guys and complain."

"Please save that for when we get home. I don't feel like listening to you."

"Yeah, well, too bad. Do you realize exactly what we're doing?"

"What?"

"What! We're on a date, that's what!"

"...And you just figured this out?"

"No!" Wufei scowled. "Doesn't that...bother you?"

"Well, it did, but I got over it. I mean, the date's almost over. We just have dinner and...the movie." Heero suddenly looked uncomfortable. "Ah, I'll be right back," he said, and he dashed into one of the open stalls. Wufei busied himself with glaring at some old lady who gave him an odd look as she exited the bathroom, and continued pitying himself. Several minutes later, Heero finally emerged. "Disgusting," he mumbled, ignoring the look Wufei sent him. "So," he said a little louder, "what were you saying?"

"Nothing, never mind. Let's go." Heero nodded and followed him out. "I wonder what the others are doing..." Wufei said, almost wistfully. Heero looked at him and shook his head.

& & & &

Back at the house, the rest of the girls had gotten home from school and were currently seated around the table eating a dinner consisting of nothing more than salads. Yes, even Duo, who had shocked even himself when he announced that he wasn't all that hungry.

"So, did you get a picture of them before they left?" Hilde asked, continuing their conversation about Heero and Wufei.

"Damn! No we didn't! We'll have to take one when they get back," Sally said. "Actually we should take one of all of you."

"Um, how about NO!" Duo shouted. "These are not things I want to remember. Being a woman is totally screwing me up. I mean, here I am, eating nothing more than a salad for dinner, and it doesn't bother me! I'm not even hungry enough to finish the damn thing."

"Come on Duo, its not that bad." Both Trowa and Duo stared at Quatre like he was insane. "Well its not!" he said defensively.

"Not for you maybe," Trowa started, "But you're used to being dressed up in girls clothes."

"Trowa!" Quatre cried as Duo started laughing.

"Well you are. You told me about you playing dress-up with your sisters when you were younger."

"You weren't supposed to say anything!"

"Oh...sorry..." Quatre crossed his arms across his chest and sulked.

"Um...how about we watch a movie or something?" Midii suggested.

"Nothing sad," Quatre said.

"Quatre, Titanic was NOT sad," Dorothy said as she headed for the living room. Quatre watched her walk out.

"I thought it was," he grumbled.

"Quatre, you've been awful emotional lately," said Relena, looking at Quatre in concern.

"So, what's your point?"

"Uh, is it your-"

"NO!"

"Ok ok, just wondering," Relena said, backing off.

"Hey guys! How about something scary?" Midii called from the living room.

"Like what?" asked Hilde, as she and the others entered the room.

"Scream 11 is on."

"Scream 11? That is the funniest movie!" Dorothy exclaimed, plopping down on the couch.

"Funny? I thought it was supposed to be gruesome," Hilde said, sitting down next to Dorothy.

"Well yeah," Dorothy said, looking at Hilde, "but the people in it are so stupid."

"Let's watch it," Trowa said, sitting down on the loveseat.

"One word out of you about Pacifism and I'll tie you to a chair and gag you," Dorothy said as Relena opened her mouth to speak.

"Well!" said Relena, looking slightly offended. "I was just going to ask if anyone wanted popcorn and drinks."

"Oh, well in that case, I'm sorry and sure," said Dorothy, smiling brightly. Relena sighed and walked back into the kitchen.

& & & &

Heero and Wufei arrived back at the table just as the waiter was taking Dan and Trevor's orders.

"Hey girls, you got back just in time!" Dan exclaimed, as he got up to pull the chair out for Wufei, much to Wufei's annoyance. Trevor did likewise for Heero who mumbled a thank you. "So, what do you want? You can get anything on the menu." Wufei scanned over the list trying to find something that he deemed edible.

"The steak looks good," he said quietly. Catching the look Heero gave him, Wufei quickly amended that statement. "Ahh, but I'm not that hungry so I'll think I'll just have...the, uh, Frenchonionsoupandasalad," he finished quickly, thrusting the menu at the waiter.

"And I'll have the chicken Caesar salad," Heero said with a much calmer demeanor.

"Man, I've never understood how girls could eat so little," Trevor said leaning back in his chair. Wufei glared at Heero across the table.

"Peer pressure," he grumbled, and Heero smirked.

& & & &

Back at the house:

Relena sat, eyes wide in horror. Hilde paused in the act of eating a handful of popcorn. Trowa grimaced and closed his eyes involuntarily. Sally brought a hand up to cover her eyes, while Quatre and Duo both squealed, "EEWWWWW!" Midii shrieked, and Dorothy started cracking up.

"That was disgusting!" Hilde declared, putting the popcorn down since she had lost her appetite. "Dorothy Catalonia! How can you possibly laugh at that!"

"It's...it's so...so FAKE!" Dorothy replied, in between her laughter. "His head just rolled off and...and SPLAT! Right onto the street!" She continued her laughter as the others looked at her in disbelief.

& & & &

"So," Trevor said, trying to start a conversation. "What time does your flight leave tomorrow?"

"Twelve."

"Three-thirty." Wufei and Heero looked at each other. "I meant twelve."

"Oops, my bad, three-thirty." Glaring at each other, Wufei continued. "Well I guess we'll have to check our tickets when we get back to the hotel," he snapped.

"Yes, I guess we will," Heero replied tightly. Then he sighed and leaned back in his seat. Uncomfortable with the silence that fell on them, Heero asked the first thing that came to his mind. "So, did you two fight at all in the war?" Across the table from him, Wufei smacked his forehead. What a GREAT conversation starter.

"Actually we did. Sad to say we fought for OZ though. That's actually where we met. I didn't realize at the time exactly what I was doing," Dan answered.

'Oh boy, wrong answer,' Wufei thought as Heero clenched his fists on the other side of the table and his eyes suddenly narrowed.

"Whoa, did I say something wrong?" Dan asked, noticing the change in Heero's composure. Before Heero could say anything, Wufei answered for him.

"OZ destroyed the base Mary's brother was at during the war. She still takes it hard," Wufei whispered as Heero took deep breaths to calm himself.

"Oh I'm so sorry," Trevor said as he looked at Heero in worry.

"Its ok," Heero said dismissively. "That happens during war."

"I know how you feel," Dan said slowly. "One of the Gundams destroyed the base where my older brother and dad were at. Then, as if that weren't enough, another one destroyed the colony my grandparents moved to. That's why I joined OZ in the first place." Heero and Wufei looked at each other. They knew who destroyed the colony.

"Uh, do you know which on e destroyed the base?" Wufei asked casually, taking a sip of his soda.

"I think it was 05. It was the Lake Victoria base. Lt. Noin was their instructor." Wufei immediately choked on his drink.

"Oh God, I'm sorry!" he blurted out after he recovered.

"For what?" Dan asked in confusion. Wufei could have smacked himself, and he did inwardly.

"Um...well, I'm just sorry. Nataku destroyed the base my friend was at too."

"Nataku?" Wufei hit himself inwardly again.

"Um...isn't that what they call 05?"

"I thought it was called Shenlong, but I could be wrong." Wufei shrunk down into seat.

"Oh yeah...sooo, which Gundam was your favorite?" Wufei asked, desperately trying to change the subject. Heero chuckled at him.

"Definitely 01," Trevor said. Heero smiled widely.

"Mine too!" he announced, and Trevor smiled at him, causing him to remember who he was now. "I thought it had the best colors." Heero winced as he said that. How degrading!

"I liked 02," Dan put in. Wufei slammed his glass onto the table.

"You like Deathscythe the best!" he yelled, startling Dan and Trevor.

"Don't mind her," Heero said quietly. "02 destroyed the base her brother was at."

"Well, it seems like we all lost people due to that damn war," Trevor said quietly. Heero nodded and put on what he hoped was a sympathetic look. Wufei sunk lower into his seat.

'I wanna go home!' he whined in his mind, and Heero smirked at the pilot who was slowly disappearing beneath the table.

& & & &

"Don't go in there!" Quatre yelled at the screen.

"Ugh! These people are so stupid! Don't they know what's going to happen?" Duo also yelled, huddled under a blanket with Quatre.

"No! AHHH! Turn around!" Quatre screamed. He and Duo threw the blanket over their heads as the killer brought the knife down and stabbed the poor, unsuspecting person in the back.

"Is it over yet?" Duo whimpered pathetically, nudging Hilde in the ribs.

"I don't know, my eyes are closed," she said back. Quatre peered out from under the blanket at the TV screen that was a little too quiet.

"I think it's over," he whispered pulling the blanket down. Duo poked his head out of the blanket, ignoring the laughs he got from Trowa about how messed up his hair was. Abruptly the blanket got pulled back over their heads as, out of nowhere, about three people on the TV screen got attacked by various people jumping around in the traditional Scream outfit.

"Scoot over!" Hilde yelled, shoving herself under the blanket with them. Next to her, Trowa shrieked involuntarily and covered his eyes with his hands.

"Tell me when it's over," he heard himself say, though he knew he shouldn't be so affected by this. He had just fought through the frickin' war! Relena and Midii huddled together as the movie continued. Sally and Dorothy sat pretty much unaffected but enjoying the reactions of the others.

"It's over guys," Dorothy said.

"Thank God,' Duo mumbled, pulling his head out of the blanket again, only to discover it was indeed NOT over.

"AAAHHHHHHH!" Six people screamed (yes, even Trowa), and Dorothy smirked.

"Oops, I guess not."

& & & &

Wufei walked under the stars towards the movie theater across the street from the restaurant, trying to ignore the fact that another guy was currently holding his hand.

'Ugh, this is so degrading,' Wufei thought. He glanced back over his shoulder, pleased to see that Heero looked just as miserable/awkward as he felt. Wufei turned his attention back to Dan who started to talk.

"So, what movie do you want to see?"

"Pearl Harbor's showing," Trevor suggested.

"Isn't that movie like three hours long?" Heero asked in a panicked voice.

'Ahh, so this date IS starting to get to him,' Wufei noticed.

"Yeah it is, and it's a big love story. I don't really want to see anything like that, but it's up to you girls," Dan said.

"I'm more of an action person myself," Wufei said.

"Then let's see The Fast and The Furious," said Trevor. (A/N: I know these movies would not be showing during their time, but oh well)

"Ok, fine by me," Heero said, relieved that they weren't seeing a three-hour movie.

"Do you want popcorn or anything?" Dan asked them after they paid for their tickets.

"Sur-"

"Just a drink please," Heero said, cutting Wufei off. Wufei sighed.

"Yeah, Dr. Pepper please," he said, then glared at Heero. Heero shrugged and gave him a look as if to say, "What?" Wufei shook his head, and the four walked into the theater.

It took the group a while to find four seats next to each other in the theater. When the lights started dimming, Dan and Trevor suggested that they just split up into groups of two, but Wufei and Heero had firmly said no, not wanting to be stuck alone with the guys. So in the end, the four sat in third row from the font, staring up at the screen that rose above them. It wasn't all that comfortable, but they could deal with it. Dan and Trevor were courteous enough not to put their arms around the girls' shoulders, which Wufei and Heero were all too happy about. Overall, the movie experience was fine, though the movie could have used a little more violence in Heero's opinion. Eventually, the four found themselves back in the Mercedes on their way back to the hotel that Wufei and Heero were supposedly staying at.

As the car rolled up in front of the hotel, Dan parked it and climbed out, much to Wufei's dismay. He had been hoping they would just let them out and they could go. Trevor also got out and walked around to open Heero's door. Together they walked up to the front of the hotel while Dan talked to Wufei beside the car.

'Say something,' Heero told himself. 'Say you had a good time or something so he'll just go away.' Heero opened his mouth to speak, but Trevor beat him to the punch.

"I must say, it's a shame you have to leave tomorrow. I would love to be able to get to know you better."

'Ooooh, there'd better not be an underlying meaning to that,' Heero thought as his eyes narrowed involuntarily. Before he could say anything, Trevor spoke again.

"I had a good time tonight though."

Heero nodded. "Yeah, it was fun. I wish we could do it again," he said smiling slightly. Inside he was cringing, and he had to resist the urge to roll his eyes. 'Ugh, gag me,' he thought.

"I hope this doesn't seem too forward, but I really did have a good time tonight, so I'll just leave you with this and get out of here before I decide to go by a ticket to the colonies myself."

'Leave me with what?' Heero asked himself, looking up to meet Trevor's eyes in search of answer. He didn't get one though, because Trevor's eyes were closed. 'Uhhhhh, what the hell is he doing?' Heero panicked as his eyes did the opposite of Trevor's and widened. He tried to bring up a hand to hit him or something, but found that his body would not comply with his wishes, as he stood there frozen to his spot. 'Shit, shit, shit! What do I do!' Heero thought as Trevor's face moved closer to his, a little too close for comfort. 'Ah hell,' was the last thing that flashed through Heero's mind as his eyes also closed, though against his will.

"Well I had fun tonight," Wufei said back at the car, trying to get Dan to go away. All Wufei wanted was to go home, curl up in his bed, and wake up to find that this had all been some horrible dream. No, scratch that, some horrible NIGHTMARE.

"It was fun, wasn't it? I only wish we could do it again." Dan sighed. "You have to go back to the colonies though. Well, I hope you have a safe trip, and anytime you're in town, look me up. Trevor and I would be pleased to...do...this again..." Dan had turned around to locate Trevor as he said this, and he found him by the entrance with Heero, oblivious to anything else going on. "Well! How about that?" he said, smiling.

"How about what?" Wufei asked suspiciously. Dan pointed to the couple by the door, and Wufei's eyes widened to the point that he was sure they would fall out of their sockets and roll away down the street. 'What the hell is Yuy doing!' Wufei's mind screamed at him. 'He's been a little too laid back this whole time; maybe he really is gay...nah! He couldn't be, he cares too much about Relena. Oh shit! What if Dan decides find another way to say goodbye to me too! I better move it.' "Well Dan, it was nice to meet you and I had a great time but I really have to go now so bye! Thanks for everything!" Wufei said quickly, and dashed away before Dan had the chance to reply. Wufei walked by Heero, glaring at him out of the corner of his, just as Trevor pulled away and walked down the stairs, saying a quiet goodbye. Trevor and Dan climbed back into the car, waving at the two girls standing outside the hotel, before driving out of their lives forever.

Wufei stood still for a few seconds before turning to Heero to say something. He stopped, however, when he saw that Heero was standing there wide-eyed, and he was pretty sure that he wasn't breathing.

'Omigod, omigod, omigod,' was the only thought Heero's brain was forming at the moment. 'Shit, shit, shit. Did he...I'm pretty sure he...yeah, he definitely did. Holy shit! I just kissed a guy! This bites! ARGH! Actually, he kissed me, so it wasn't my fault. Well I did kiss him back...I think. Did I? No, I'm pretty sure I just stood there frozen like an idiot. Anyway, it was too short for me to even start kissing him back...Ok, did that just sound regretful? I don't regret it not being long, do I? No, I don't regret it, not at all. In fact, thank God it wasn't long! Oh...crap. Did Wufei see me? Shit, if he did then I'll never here the end of it. He already thinks I didn't mind going on this date. O...k...why is everything starting to spin slightly? I suddenly feel really...dizzy. Can't think...anymore. Oh wait...you know what...I think I'm just running out of air...and my eyes are starting to sting...when's the last time I blinked? It must have been a while...Ok...yeah...I definitely need to breathe...like...NOW!' Heero sucked in a gulp of air, and started swaying slightly, his eyes blinking rapidly. After gulping down a few more breaths of air, he started coughing. Wufei pounded on his back until he finally started to recover, and then glared at him.

"What?" Heero croaked, staring up at Wufei.

"What? What! Do you know what you just did?" Heero felt himself blush.

"Um...I have no idea what you're talking about," Heero said, turning away from Wufei. "Where's Sally? Isn't she supposed to pick us up?"

"Don't change the subject!" Wufei growled, yanking Heero back around so he could look at him.

"Well what do you want me to say? Fine, alright, he kissed me. There, you happy! It was really short though, so don't get you panties in a knot," Heero said haughtily, crossing his arms across his chest and turning away from Wufei once again. He then reached up with one hand to fell his lips as he looked off in the direction the guys had driven. It was quiet for a minute before Wufei spoke again.

"Did you enjoy it?"

"What type of question is that!" Heero screeched, turning back around to face Wufei. "Why? Are you jealous?"

"No! What on earth would I be jealous? I'll wait to kiss a woman, thank you very much."

"I think you're jealous because your date didn't kiss you!"

"Yeah, well, you're wrong. End of discussion." Wufei turned and face the other direction so Heero couldn't see the slight blush that spread across his cheeks. Suddenly his eyes widened. "Wait, where IS Sally?"

"She's not here?" Wufei shook his head.

"I don't see her anywhere."

"I guess we'll have to call them then." Wufei nodded in agreement, and the two walked into the hotel to find a phone.

& & & &

"Really guys! You can come out from under the blanket now. The movie has been over for while," Dorothy said, looking over at Quatre, Duo, and Hilde who were still hiding under the big quilt. They didn't move. "Come one, this is getting pathetic," she mumbled. Standing up, she walked over to the trio and ripped the blanket off of them.

"AAHHHH! It's the evil Doro-monster!" Duo screamed.

"The evil what!" Dorothy yelled.

"Oh, it's just Dorothy," Duo said. He then looked around warily, as if something might jump out at him. "There's no one else here, is there?"

"No one else?" Dorothy asked, a little confused before realization dawned on her. "Oh for goodness sakes Duo! It was just a movie!"

"Yeah, but anything could happen," Quatre said, as he too crawled out from under the blanket, followed by Hilde.

"You three are really pathetic," Trowa stated from across the room.

"Yeah, Dorothy's right," Relena agreed. "It was ONLY a movie"  
"A movie that started out with something as simple as a telephone call. See? A normal, everyday thing led to millions of deaths!" Duo persisted.

"It was not a million deaths Duo," Midii stated.

"Hmph." Duo crossed his arms across his chest. "Well I'm not ever answering the phone again." A sudden sound was heard that sent the screaming trio back under the blanket, and made the other occupants in the room jump.

_RIIIINNNG_

"Oh gosh, it's just the...phone," Dorothy said, almost laughing at how ironic that was.

"Don't answer it!" Duo, Hilde, and Quatre screamed. Of course, Dorothy didn't listen.

"Answer it Relena."

"Uh...Hello?" Relena said, her voice a little unsteady before she let out a huge sigh of relief. "Oh, it's just Wufei you guys. So how'd the date go?... ...Oh, that bad, huh?... ...Well, did you have fun?... ...Ok, ok, sorry!... ...Heero had fun though?" Relena could here the sounds of protesting in the background. "What restaurant did you go to?... ...Oh! That's one of my favorites!... ...Haha! But you could only get a salad, that's kinda funny... ...Ok, yeah, I'll tell Sally to go pick you up... ...Alright, see ya soon!... ...Yeah ok, bye. Sally, they need you to pick them up," Relena said, as she hung up the phone.

"Right, I'm on my way," Sally said as she walked out the door, keys in hand.

"So how'd it go?" Duo asked, all fear of being attacked seemingly gone.

"I think I'll let them tell you," Relena said, as she changed the channel on the T.V.

About twenty minutes later, Sally walked back into the room with the two she had gone to pick up. Not looking at anyone, Heero and Wufei quickly walked passed everyone and walked upstairs to change.

"Man, they looked pissed," Duo said. "What happened?"

"Well," said Sally, "I don't know what happened to them on the date, but," Sally held up a camera, "they're mad at me because I got a picture of them." Everyone started laughing.

"Oh man, I can't wait to see that!" Duo said, in between laughing. He stopped abruptly as Sally pushed a button on the camera. "On no you did NOT just take a picture of me!" Duo yelled. Before anyone could say anything, Sally turned around the room, getting a picture of a disheveled Quatre, and a wide-eyed Trowa.

"Well, that's everyone!" Sally said cheerfully. While the girls only laughed more, the guys glared at her. Duo opened his mouth to speak, but a loud scream interrupted him.

"SALLY!" Wufei stalked back into the room, and the others did all they could not to laugh at him. He had undone one of his braids completely while the other was halfway undone. The hair was frizzy and wavy from being in the braids. He was wearing only a long nightshirt that came down to his knees, and his face was bright red from yelling.

"What? Wufei, what's wrong?" Sally asked, genuinely worried.

"What's wrong? What's wrong!" Wufei yelled, his voice getting louder, if possible, each time he spoke. "What's wrong is that I got my God damn period! I HATE BEING A WOMAN! I HATE IT! I WANT TO BE A MAN AGAIN! THIS IS AN INJUUUSTTIIIICEEE!" Wufei panted slightly after that and looked around the room with pleading eyes. "I need help," he said in a much quieter voice. Sally looked over to Relena who immediately got up and led Wufei out of the room.

"Wow," Quatre said after a minute of silence. "I'm the only one left."

"Hmm, poor Wufei, almost makes you feel bad for him," Trowa said.

"Yeah," Duo agreed. "Almost."

* * *

Hehe, I so enjoy putting men through some of these things. :)

-Maxine


	12. Chapter 11

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 11

* * *

By Thursday, the gundam pilots turned women were extremely bored. Dorothy had stayed home with them on Wednesday, and they had done virtually nothing besides eating, lounging around, and watching movies. Much to Duo's disappointment, they had not been able to get Heero and Wufei to say anything about the date, besides what they had ordered at the restaurant and what movie they had seen. Eventually he had given up. Now Midii was staying home with them, and she was getting tired of all the guys complaining.

"Guys!" she finally snapped, catching everyone's attention. "Why don't you go to the gym and work out or something. You're driving me insane!"

"Is that possible?" Duo asked, his eyes wide with curiosity.

"Is what possible?" Midii replied.

"Working out...in our condition."

"In your...condition?" Midii thought about that for a second before realization hit her. "Oh, for crying out loud, Duo! It's JUST your damn period! It's no big deal!" Duo shrunk back.

"Just wondering," he said sheepishly.

"That's actually not a bad idea," Heero said, looking up from his game of chess with Trowa.

"Yeah, I feel like I've gained twenty pounds lately," added Trowa.

"God, I need to shave." Duo blinked and looked towards the couch, as did the other occupants in the room. Quatre, still rubbing a hand up his leg, looked up noticing the silence in the room. "Eh-heh," he said, going a little pink. "I take it I said that out loud?"

"Yeah, you did," Duo replied, plopping down onto the couch next to him. He squinted at Quatre's leg. "Quat, the hair's coming in blonde. No one can tell." Quatre snorted.

"Well I can, and I feel all grungy." Duo propped his foot up on the coffee table along side Quatre's.

"Me too," he agreed, scrutinizing his leg. "I just realized how...how...bleh that looks."

"Bleh?"

"Yeah," Duo replied. "You know, nasty, disgusting, just...bleh." Quatre blinked.

"Okaaaay."

"And mine's coming in black! Eeewww," Duo said, making a face. Heero, Trowa, and Wufei watched this scene with disinterest.

"I can lend you my razor," Midii offered. "If it's really bothering you." Duo blinked, and then looked thoughtful.

"Ok! Quat, will you do it with me?" Duo said, looking at Quatre with puppy-dog eyes. Quatre sighed.

"Alright. It can't be too hard..."

"Just be careful, and don't press down too hard or you'll cut yourself," Midii said, heading towards the stairs and motioning for the two on the couch to follow her. They looked toward the other three.

"You gonna join us?" Duo asked. They shook their heads. Duo shrugged. "Ok, suit yourself."

& & & &

Almost thirty minutes later, Dou and Quatre finally came back downstairs, pretty much unscathed from their experience with a razor. Glancing around the room once, Duo ran over and sat down next to Wufei.

"Hey, Wu-man, check it out!" Duo exclaimed excitedly, laying his leg across Wufei's lap. Wufei grimaced and pushed the offending appendage off. Duo replaced it promptly.

"What do you want Duo?" Wufei asked exasperatedly.

"Feel it!" Wufei raised an eyebrow.

"I am NOT feeling your leg, Duo."

"But it's all smooth now. Come on, see if you can tell the difference between your leg and mine."

"No," Wufei said turning back to the T.V. Duo rolled his eyes and, before Wufei could stop him, grabbed one of his hands and ran it down his leg. Wufei yanked his hand away from Duo, scowling.

"See, nice and smooth," Duo said, smiling triumphantly. "Unlike you three who are too scared to try shaving."

"Only women shave their legs, baka." Duo opened his mouth, but Wufei held up a hand to silence him. "Don't say it."

"Don't say what?"

"You know."

"What, that we ARE women?"

"Yes," Wufei said reluctantly, "that."

"Are you admitting it?"

"It's kind of hard not too," Wufei replied, glaring at Duo.

"So then you can shave, right?"

"I don't want to."

"It's not that difficult," Duo said, looking his legs over. "It just hurts like hell if you cut yourself. Well, actually, it only stings really bad, but it doesn't really hurt. And the blood just doesn't stop!" Duo rambled on.

"Ok, you know what?" Wufei said, standing up suddenly and knocking Duo's leg off him. "I'm gonna go to the gym like Midii suggested, ok?"

"And do what?" asked Heero. Wufei raised an eyebrow.

"Make some ice cream," he replied sarcastically. "What the hell do you think? I'm going to work out."

"I knew that, baka," Heero said, rolling his eyes. "I meant are you going to lift weights, go running?"

"...Oh. Well, I guess I'll just lift weights or something. I don't think it'd be very comfortable to run." Heero nodded.

"I'll join you then. Let me go change."

"I'll come too," Trowa said, also heading upstairs.

"Yeah me too!" Duo shouted, running to catch up. Quatre sighed and followed, with Midii behind him.

Not long after that found the six teens in the Peacecraft mansion's personal gym. Trowa, Quatre, and Duo were running laps around the track, while Heero, Wufei, and Midii lifted weights. When they had entered the room, Midii had walked right over and started her usual routine. However, it took Wufei and Heero a while to figure out which weights they could now lift.

"Damn it!" Wufei exclaimed. He was using both arms to lift the size weight he usually lifted, and even then, he could barely get it inches off the rack. "Damn weak woman body!" he grunted, sweat breaking out across his forehead. "Can't even lift this stupid weight with BOTH arms!"

"Give it up, Wufei," Heero said, looking over at him. "That body isn't as well-trained as your normal body. Just lift something lighter today."

"No! I know I can lift this!" He paused, holding the weight no more than six inches in the air, and dropped it back onto the rack. "Ok," Wufei panted. "Maybe not." He looked out the window to the track. "How the hell can they do that?" he asked, gesturing to the three running outside. Heero glanced out, and shrugged.

"Well, Quatre never hit his 'time-of-the-month.'"

"Lucky bastard," Wufei grumbled under his breath.

"As for the other two...I don't know. Maybe it doesn't bother them or something." Off to the side, Midii smirked to herself.

"How could it not?" Wufei asked. "I mean, it feels like I'm wearing a God damn...diaper or something. It's not funny, damn it!" he shouted, as Midii started laughing.

"Sorry," Midii said, trying to stifle her laughter. "But if it bothers you so much, then why don't you wear a-"

"Hell no," Heero said, cutting her off. "We can deal, thank you very much." Midii shrugged.

"Suit yourself." There was silence for a while, as the trio continued their workout. A little while later, the silence was broken as Duo poked his head into the room.

"Hey guys!" he shouted enthusiastically. "We're gonna play some football, wanna come?"

"Football?" asked Midii incredulously.

"Well, not really. We're just gonna toss a ball around for a while," Duo replied.

"Sure," Heero said, grabbing a towel to wipe off his sweat.

"Yeah, I'll come," Midii said.

"Football is not something weak women should play," Wufei stated, crossing his arms.

"Are you saying you're weak, Wu-man?" Duo asked, a wide smile covering his face. Wufei scowled, and started walking towards the door.

"No," he said. "_I'm_ not a woman. I'm really a man." Duo rolled his eyes and followed him out.

"Whatever, man."

& & & &

"Hey Heero! Go long!" Duo shouted, raising his arm with the football in it. Heero looked up and somewhat reluctantly backed up. He caught the ball easily as Duo threw it to him.

"I never liked football," Midii said casually. She was lying in the grass, propped up on her elbows. Next to her, Quatre nodded his head, and plucked a flower off the ground.

"Me neither. It just never caught my interest," he said, adding the flower to the necklace he was making.

"Football's a good sport," Wufei spoke up. He picked another flower up and held it up to the sun as if he were examining it. "It requires a strong body. That's why mainly men play it. Women are too weak and fragile." He let go of the flower, watching it fall to the ground.

"You know, at the rate you're going, I wouldn't be surprised if that funky lady never changed you back," Midii said, glancing at Wufei who had gone several shades paler.

"No, she said after two weeks she'd change us back," said Quatre, looking at Midii. "I don't think she'd lie."

"Quatre, she never said that. She said she 'thought two weeks would be enough time.' She THOUGHT. Maybe she'll discover she was wrong and leave you as women for a year," Midii replied. Wufei groaned and fell back into the grass. A sudden shout from the field caused Midii, Wufei, and Quatre to jump up. Looking around, they discovered that the source of the sound was Trowa, who was sitting in the grass with his arms wrapped around his chest. Duo was standing across from him with a look of shock on his face, and Heero was hovering above Trowa.

"What happened?" Midii panted, as she and the other two ran over to them.

"I-I threw the ball to Trowa, but he didn't catch it," Duo replied, his eyes still wide.

"You threw a bullet pass at him," Heero stated.

"I thought he could catch it!"

"You forgot to TELL him you were going to throw it!" Heero shouted back.

"Wait, wait, wait," Midii said, stepping between them. "He didn't catch the football. Got that. Now why is he on the ground?"

"The ball hit him in the chest and he fell over," Heero answered. Midii eyes widened.

"It hit him in the chest!" Heero looked at her oddly, and nodded. Midii immediately knelt down beside Trowa and put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you ok?" she asked worriedly.

"Owwww," was the reply she got. "Holy...shit...that...really hurt," Trowa gasped.

"Tell me about it," Midii said sympathetically. Trowa finally looked up and the others noticed that his eyes looked more watery than usually.

"Oh my God. Pain, lot's of pain," Trowa said to no one in particular. He finally moved his arms from his chest. "That's gonna leave a bruise," he muttered, glaring at Duo.

"Oh come on, it can't be that bad," Wufei said scornfully. Trowa turned his glare on him.

"It's probably the equivalent of being kicked in the balls," Midii spat out, rubbing Trowa's shoulder. The others looked at him expectantly.

"Yeah, that's probably right. Geez, it hurt like hell!" The others winced at that.

"Ok then, forget my previous statement," Wufei said dismissively.

"Yo, T-man. Gomen, I had no idea. I really thought you would catch that pass," Duo said, scratching his head.

"It's ok Duo. I'm fine," Trowa said, finally standing up.

"You sure?" Trowa nodded. "Then can we eat lunch now? 'Cause I'm starved," Duo said sheepishly.

"Sure, let's go inside. The others will be home soon anyway," Midii said. She led the way back to the palace.

& & & &

After lunch, the teens headed upstairs to clean off after working out. Heero, just out of the shower and wrapped in a towel, was searching the cabinets for more, ahem, feminine hygiene products. He was having no luck in finding them though. A knock sounded on the door, and Heero shouted for the person to come in.

"I need more, um, pad thingies," Wufei said, as he walked into the bathroom.

"Yeah? Well so do I, but I can't find anymore," Heero replied. Wufei glanced around.

"Damn, that's not good." Heero shook his head, and opened another cabinet. A small smile crossed his face.

"Found them!" he said triumphantly. Then he frowned. "Uh, there's only one left." Wufei's eyes narrowed.

"Well, I need it, it's mine."

"Um, no, I found it, so it's mine!"

"Damn it Heero I need it more than you! Give it to me!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"NO!"

"YES!" An all out fight ensued just as Duo walked by the door.

"Whoa, guys, what're you doing? Stop it!" he shouted. Heero and Wufei looked over at him. "What're you fighting over?" He eyed the problem of the fight and started to chuckle. "You guys are STILL wearing those?" he questioned, trying not to laugh. Wufei and Heero's eyebrows shot up.

"You mean your time's over?" Wufei asked. Duo blinked.

"Well, no. I think it almost is though, but hell, what do I know?"

"So...what did you mean?" Heero asked warily.

"I was asking if you were still wearing pads," Duo replied.

"...You're not?" asked Wufei, his eyes widening.

"Pfft, no! Trowa and I got sick of them. They were too nasty and uncomfortable."

"So then...what're you wearing?" Wufei asked, though he was pretty sure he knew the answer.

"What do you think? Tampons, duh! We just asked Midii, and she gave us a box. It has the directions and everything!" Wufei and Heero looked at each other, and then back at Duo.

"What's it like?" Heero asked.

Duo raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Uh, they're a lot more comfortable. They're easier to run in, because you can't really tell they're there. Um...you know what? This conversation's getting weird, so I'm just gonna leave you too alone now, ok? See ya!" He walked out of the bathroom. Heero and Wufei looked at each other again, then at the pad, then back at the door.

"Wait! Duo!" they shouted, and ran out after him.

& & & &

Later, after the other girls had returned from high school, the phone rang.

"Can you get that, Dorothy?" Relena shouted from the kitchen. Dorothy nodded and picked up the phone. A few minutes later, she called Relena over.

"It's the people from the beach," she said. Relena looked confused for a second before realization dawned on her. Her eyes widened.

"And?" she prompted.

"They're checking to make sure we still are renting the beach house from tomorrow night to Wednesday. Standard procedure, they have to check." Relena nodded.

"I'd almost forgotten its spring break after tomorrow. Um...darn! I still wanna go!"

"Me too, but it's not really fair to the guys," Dorothy said.

"I know."

"Oh no! You are NOT canceling those reservations just because the guys are women now!" Hilde shouted, marching into the living room.

"Were you eavesdropping, Ms. Schlbeiker (sp?)?" Dorothy asked, raising an eyebrow. Hilde shrugged.

"I overheard you from the kitchen. But really, if it bothers the guys that much, they can stay here! Right? Please guys, I really wanna go to the beach," Hilde pleaded, putting on a puppy-dog face.

"Fine by me," Dorothy replied. She glanced at Relena.

"Sure," she said, shrugging. "Sounds good." Dorothy smirked, and spoke to the person on the phone again.

"Ok then, that's that. Let's tell the others," Dorothy said after she hung up.

A few minutes later:

"What! We can't go to the beach! Are you crazy?" Duo shouted. The four other boys nodded in agreement.

"What do you expect us to do? Hang out in the house all day?" Heero asked, glaring at anything and everything. He didn't get a reply as the girls just looked at each other.

"Injustice!" shouted Wufei. "How come we have to be cooped up inside? I say we don't go!"

"Whoa, hold up," Sally said, holding up her hands. "First off, staying here is not fair to US. Second, YOU all don't have to go, you can stay here. Third, if you do go, no one said you have to stay inside." Sally ticked the options off on her fingers. Quatre blinked.

"Well, I DO want to go," the blonde said sheepishly.

"What's the point?" Duo asked, sulking on the couch. "We can't actually go to the beach."

"Why not?" Hilde asked. Now Duo blinked.

"Well...because...Trowa, tell 'em why."

"Actually, I was wondering the same thing. Why not, Duo?" Trowa replied. While Duo searched for an answer, Heero spoke up.

"We don't have proper bathing suits, for one."

"So," Sally started.

"We'll go bathing suit shopping," Relena finished. The five boys shrunk back in their seats.

"Yeah, problem solved!" Hilde added.

"Fine," Duo said after a while. "We go," he shuddered, "bathing suit shopping. Great. But that's only because I really wanna go to the beach!"

"You're going to have one heck of a weird tan when you're turned back into a guy," Midii said.

"Don't remind me," Duo grumbled.

"Ok, it's settled then. We'll pack tonight, Hilde will take you swimsuit shopping in the morning, and we'll leave for the beach after school," Relena exclaimed.

"Great," Duo mumbled. "Juuuust peachy."

* * *

Yay, the beach chapters are coming up! Woo-hoo! More updates soon. :)

-Maxine


	13. Chapter 12

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 12

* * *

"Duo! Come out of there already!" Hilde cried, banging on the changing room door.

"Hell no!" was the reply she got. Hilde sighed.

"Come on Duo," she said in a quieter voice. "I just want to see what it looks like." There was a pause, and then some shuffling could be heard from inside the stall.

"Why'd you have to pick a suit that's so...revealing?" Duo grumbled. Hilde blinked.

"Duo, that suit's...conservative..."

"Not really. It shows my whole stomach and back..." Duo mumbled some more.

"Yes, well, that's usually what bikinis do," Hilde replied, somewhat sarcastically.

"Why'd you pick me out a bikini?"

"I thought you liked bikinis," Hilde said innocently.

"Not on me!" Duo whined.

"Duo, you're starting to annoy me. I'll climb under the door!" Hilde threatened. Inside the stall, Duo glanced at the door, noticing the distance from the bottom of it to the floor.

"You wouldn't!" He shouted in a panicked voice.

"I would," Hilde shot back. There was a slight pause again.

"Where are the others?"

"Outside looking at other swimsuits," Hilde replied, smirking triumphantly to herself. A few seconds later, the door opened a crack, and one violet eye peeked out. Hilde yanked the door the rest of the way open, and Duo yelped. He tried covering himself with his hands, but finally settled for crossing his arms across his chest.

"I feel so naked," he grumbled, but Hilde wasn't paying attention. She walked around him, scrutinizing the suit. It had a navy blue top that tied around the neck and once across the back. The bottom was also navy blue and looked like a pair of really short shorts, and all the outlining and tying strings were white. There were also white flowers splashed throughout the material. Finally, she smiled.

"I like it! The color suits you well," she said.

"Oh, the color suits me well, joy," Duo mimicked, and then sighed.

"Hey Heero! Come here!" Hilde yelled. Duo yipped, and dashed back into the changing room, leaving Hilde laughing in the hallway. "Don't change yet, Duo. I'll be right back," she called, walking back into the store. She immediately spotted the other four in one corner of the shopping area. "Hey guys, find anything yet?" she asked, walking up to them. She was rewarded with four glares.

Hilde sighed. It had been a major hassle getting them all to come out here. It would be even harder to get them all in suits. Walking around the different racks of clothes, Hilde figured it'd be up to her to pick out all the suits. She figured Quatre would have to have a one piece because he burned way too easily. She'd be lucky enough to stuff Wufei and Heero into tankinis, let alone bikinis. With Trowa...well, to put it bluntly, it'd be a sin not to put him in something that didn't show off his figure. Therefore, she'd get him a bikini like Duo, and they could be embarrassed together. Hilde chuckled to herself. Searching through the suits, she noticed a turquoise one-piece suit. It had a low back, and was outlined with deep blue, and had blue and turquoise diamonds throughout. It was really pretty, and it would look perfect on Quatre. One down, two if you counted Duo, and three to go.

Walking over to another rack, she spotted a suit made of cobalt blue. When she pulled it out, Hilde smiled. She didn't know if was lucky or what, but she'd just found the right suit for Heero. Trowa and Wufei were more difficult. Eventually she found everything she was looking for, and shoved the suits at their respective owners. Quatre relaxed noticeably after seeing the one-piece, and went off to the dressing rooms without an argument. The others, however, had to look their suits over before going anywhere.

"Um...there's no back to this," Heero stated, holding up the shimmering blue and black tankini top.

"I know," Hilde replied. "It's a bare back type thing. It ties at the neck and once across the back." Heero raised an eyebrow.

"It'll stay on?" he asked, looking doubtful.

"Yes, Heero, it won't go flying off into the waves." Heero glared at her and stomped off to the changing rooms. Hilde chuckled and turned around to look at the other two, only to be met my two glaring, green eyes. Trowa actually had his hair up today. "What?" Hilde asked. Trowa shoved the suit at her.

"How come I have to wear a bikini?" he asked.

"Well, you don't HAVE to...I just thought it was cute," Hilde stated, holding up the emerald green two-piece.

"You gave them one-pieces," Trowa said, pointing to Wufei.

"No she didn't," Wufei said, holding up his black and red suit. "It's like...a spaghetti-strap top thingy, and then a bikini bottom. So technically, it's a two-piece, even if it hardly shows any of your stomach."

"Duo's wearing a bikini," Hilde added.

"I saw the bottom of that one, it looked like a pair of shorts," Trowa grumbled. Hilde rolled her eyes.

"Trowa," she said, exasperated. "Look, Dorothy and I both have suits like yours, ok? Relena's is more like Duo's, Midii has an open back thing like Heero, and Sally has the same type as Wufei. None of them have one-pieces!"

"I don't want the same suit as that onna!" Wufei exclaimed.

"Well, the colors are different," Hilde said, getting annoyed.

"No, I don't want this one anymore," Wufei said, crossing his arms. Hilde sighed and glanced over at another rack. She smirked.

"Well, it's that one, or this one," she said, yanking a suit down and holding it up. Wufei's eyes widened.

"I'm not wearing that!"

"Then you'll have to wear the tankini," Hilde said simply.

"Fine," Wufei grumbled, sulking off to where the others were. Hilde smiled and put the pink, thong bikini back from where she got it. She turned back to Trowa. His expression hadn't changed any.

"Just try it on," Hilde suggested. "Maybe you'll like it..." Trowa looked doubtful, but finally gave in.

Not much longer after that, Hilde stood outside the changing rooms doors again, trying to get everyone to come out. Quatre stood next to her, perfectly content with his bathing suit, except for the fact that "it went down awfully low in the front." Wufei and Heero came out without too much of an argument. Both went and leaned on the opposite wall, crossing their arms. They looked like they had planned it or something, and Hilde couldn't resist chuckling a little. Duo was a little more difficult, and Trowa was almost worse than that.

"Duo Maxwell," Hilde growled, her patience finally flying out the window. "If you don't come out of there by the time I count to three, I'll...I'll," she faltered.

"You'll what?" Duo shot back.

"I don't know, but whatever it is...ugh! Damn it Duo! Just come out!" Hilde half pleaded. A sigh was heard from inside the stall, and the door opened. Heero and Wufei simultaneously opened their eyes and glanced over at Duo who finally poked his head out.

"Where's Trowa?" he asked, glancing around. He ignored Quatre, who was trying to get a better look at his suit from behind Hilde, until- "What! How come he gets a one-piece?" Duo shouted, snapping his head back to glare at the blonde in disbelief. He then looked at the other two, and pouted. "I hate you Hilde. You're so mean."

"Trowa's still inside the stall sulking over his bikini," Hilde replied, knowing Duo would instantly perk up when she said that. She was right.

"Bikini?"

"It's hardly a bikini," a muffled voice said. The door to Trowa's stall cracked open. "It's equivalent to going swimming in my bra and underwear, and THAT would at least cost less," Trowa grumbled, walking out. Quatre's jaw dropped, Wufei and Heero's eyes widened, Duo looked extremely happy, and Hilde smiled.

"See Trowa, it looks good!" Hilde remarked, taking a step closer to him.

"Ha! Yes!" Duo shouted, pointing a finger at Trowa. "He DOES have a bikini! And it's worse than mine! Woo-hoo!"

"Shut up, Duo," Trowa said, crossing his arms. He turned his head away from the looks they were all giving him.

"So, you're all happy with those suits? Good," Hilde said, not waiting for them to answer. "I think you guys can survive with just the one suit, right? Or do you want another one?"

"No way, babe!"

"No thanks."

"Iie!"

"Hmph, baka onna."

And a grumbled "Hell no," were the replies that she got.

& & & &

The ride to the beach was uneventful, though it was long. The group of ten left around 1 p.m. since it had been a half-day at the high school. Once they had arrived and found the beach house they were staying at, the group set about trying to make the place seem like home. They unpacked all the food they had brought first, which was quite a lot, and then started settling into their rooms. The house had two big bedrooms on the second floor, on opposite sides of the hall. In each room there were two sets of bunk beds, and then a single bed pushed up under the big bay window. There was also a connecting bathroom in each room. The first floor of the house consisted of a large living room with a big screen T.V., a spacious kitchen, and a separate eating area. Another full bathroom was also located on the first floor.

"I call top bunk!" Duo shouted as he pushed his way into the bedroom. The group had decided a while ago that the boys would sleep together in one room, while the girls stayed in the other. They'd decided to keep it that way, even if the boys were now girls.

"I want the bed under the window," Quatre said, putting his bags on top of it. The other three boys looked at each other.

"I get the top bunk," they all said simultaneously, and then glared at each other.

"Trowa, you're too tall to sleep up there. You'd hit your head on the ceiling if you woke up too fast," Wufei said, gesturing to the bed. Trowa looked up, only to see that he was right. Grumbling about how he had the worst luck, he pretty much threw his stuff onto the bed that was not under Duo.

"Hey, what's wrong with this bed?" Duo asked from his place on the top bunk. He pointed to the bed under his and continued swinging his legs back and forth.

"You're sleeping on top of it," Trowa replied. Duo paused in his leg swinging and stuck his tongue out at Trowa. Trowa didn't react to that, and instead looked at Wufei and Heero who were still glaring at each other. Or maybe they were having a staring contest or something...he wasn't sure. Suddenly Wufei thrust out his hand. Heero did the same.

"Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!" they both said. Trowa raised an eyebrow.

"Kuso," Heero grumbled, his scissors having being beat by Wufei's rock. Wufei smiled triumphantly and climbed up to the bunk above Trowa. Heero put his stuff on the other bed and glanced up at Duo, who smiled widely down at him. He turned around and glared at Wufei.

"Do you guys always decide stuff like that?" Trowa asked, as he began unpacking his bags.

"I got it from Duo," Wufei replied.

"And I'm used to Duo doing it, so I knew what Wufei had in mind," Heero added.

"Oh. So, uh, which one's mine?" Trowa asked, looking at the dressers lined up against the wall.

"Whichever one you want," Heero replied. "But that one's mine." He pointed to the one directly across from his bed, and walked over to put some clothes into it.

"So, um...do you guys still have your periods?" Quatre asked casually, propping his violin up against the wall. Heero, Wufei, and Trowa wasted no time in turning their glares on him.

"Nope!" Duo said happily. He popped a piece of gum into his mouth.

"Excuse me?" Trowa asked. "I got mine before you! How can you be done?" Duo shrugged, not really caring.

"Different people get them for different amounts of time, Trowa," Quatre said softly.

"Well if Duo's done with his, then I should be almost done because I got mine at the same time as him," Heero said, not putting any real reasoning into his words. He started to walk back to his bed for more clothes, tripped, and fell flat on his face. "Ugh, damn shoes!" Heero complained, sitting up and rubbing his sore nose. He glared at the offending objects on his feet.

"Having a hard time walking in those platforms?" Duo asked cheerfully.

"'They go well with the outfit,' she says. 'And they aren't hard to walk in. Wufei managed it.' Well, Wufei probably practiced just in case something like this ever happened. Stupid pacifism-preaching, pansy princess," Heero grumbled, getting up to his feet.

"Pacifism-preaching, pansy princess? I must say, Heero, this whole women thing is making you increasingly...unbalanced. No pun intended," Trowa stated, looking something close to worried.

"It is not!"

"More than you know, Trowa," Wufei said, glaring at Heero for his previous statement. "And I never 'practiced.' I fell the first time I walked in those damn things!"

"You!" Heero shouted, turning to Wufei and thrusting a finger in his direction. "Shut up."

"Guys, I don't wanna wear this bathing suit the whole time we're here," Duo said, finally starting to unpack. "Can we, like, switch or something, at least once?"

"Whose did you want to wear?" Wufei asked from the top bunk.

"Uhh...Heero's? I like the colors in it." Heero shrugged.

"Sure, whatever. I don't really want to wear the bikini though."

"Well, Trowa already has a bikini, so that leaves Wufei and Quatre."

"Quatre can't wear a bikini," Heero replied. "The back on his is bad enough." Quatre picked up his suit.

"Well, I could wear Wufei's," he suggested.

"It's black and red; it'd look really bad on you," Heero stated.

"That's true," Quatre said.

"When did you become a fashions' expert, Yuy?" Wufei asked. Heero blushed slightly and looked away.

"Well, there's still Trowa's suit," Duo said.

"Pfft, yeah right," Heero said, adding his two cents in again.

"I don't think it would fit you guys anyway," Trowa said simply.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Duo asked, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"I'm coming up there, Duo," Heero said, climbing to the top bunk. Duo scooted over to make room for him, and Quatre came over and sat on Heero's bed.

"What do you think?" Trowa replied, holding up the top. "Do YOU think it would fit you?" Duo blushed.

"Ahhh...I guess not," he mumbled, looking away. Trowa smirked.

"It might fit me," Wufei said, leaning down and snatching it out of Trowa's hands. He quickly put it on over his shirt. "See? It's a little tight, but I have my shirt and bra on and stuff. So it would probably fit fine."

"So Wufei can wear Trowa's-" Duo started to say.

"I'm not wearing it! I just said it would fit!" Wufei cut in.

"But Wufeeeiii! You're the only other person it would fit! And besides, the green looks really nice on you since you have a tan like Trowa," Duo said. Wufei's eyebrows went up.

"You think?" he asked, looking down at it, and then blinked. "Ahh, stop it!" he berated himself. "Talking like a baka onna..."

"I bet you wanted to wear his from the start anyway," Duo teased.

"I did not! I was just making a point that it would fit me!" Wufei shouted back.

"Uh-huh. Suuuuure. You knew that you could probably attract some other guy like you did with Dan, and then you could go on another date and take a walk under the stars, and finish up the evening by sitting in a corner swapping spit," Duo continued to tease.

"Duo, 'swapping spit?' That's disgusting," Quatre muttered.

"Hey! Heero was the one who made out with them! I left as soon as I could!" Wufei shouted, taking the bikini top off. The room went quiet.

"Heero did what!" Duo exclaimed, looking to the said pilot for an answer. Heero had suddenly stiffened, and his face had gone bright red. His eyes, which had been a little too wide, narrowed dangerously at Wufei.

"Omae. O. Korosu. Wufei," Heero growled, punctuating each word.

"Uh...eh-heh, my bad?" Wufei said nervously. Heero was about to jump of the bed, but Duo grabbed his arm.

"You kissed him?" he asked, smiling excitedly. "Which one, Trevor? That's who you went with, right?" Heero looked slightly confused about why Duo was so happy, and nodded slowly.

"Only, I didn't kiss HIM. HE kissed ME," Heero said quickly. Duo laughed.

"Was it good?" Heero blinked, and shifted uncomfortably.

"Um...I've never been kissed by another guy before, so I wouldn't know," he replied somewhat sarcastically.

"...he's never kissed at all before..." Wufei mumbled. Heero glared at him, but Duo ignored the comment.

"Haha! That's great! I KNEW something must have happened on that date! Ha-...oh..." Duo stopped suddenly. "Man, I'm glad it was you and not me. Kissing a guy...ewwww!" Trowa let out a half-strangled sputter of laugher as if he was trying to hold it in, and Quatre chuckled.

"Well, I have to say," Wufei spoke up, "it's not like Heero wanted to." Heero relaxed somewhat. "I mean, you should have seen him. His eyes were HUGE and he just stood there frozen like he had no idea under heaven what to do!" Laughter broke out in the room. Heero glared at them all, but they only laughed harder. Giving up, Heero resorted to crossing his arms and pouting. The laughter eventually died down.

"You all are a bunch of assholes," Heero muttered.

"Sorry, Heero," Quatre said, wiping his eyes. "It was kinda funny though..."

"Yeah, sorry buddy," Duo said, punching Heero's arm playfully. "Didn't mean to laugh at ya. But really, was it your first kiss?"

"Look, could we just get back to our previous conversation?" Heero asked, or more or less pleaded. Duo smiled.

"Yeah, sure," he replied. "Ok, so what was it...oh yeah, I get Heero's, Wufei gets Trowa's, Quatre's keeping his...that means Heero gets mine and Trowa can have Wufei's, since it'll obviously fit him," Duo said, ticking the names off on his fingers.

"Hey! I said I don't want the bikini," Heero said, glancing at Duo. His face had finally gone back to its original color.

"Heero, it's only fair. Trowa already has a bikini, and I don't know if my suit would fit him anyway," Duo reasoned. He shifted positions so he was lying on his stomach looking down at Trowa. "Right, Trowa?" Trowa nodded.

"Well...fine. I guess that's ok," Heero grumbled.

"Quat, are you sure you don't mind wearing the same suit?" Duo asked.

"I don't mind at all," Quatre said, shaking his head. "I get a one-piece the whole time. Besides, I brought some of my sisters suits."

"Why didn't you tell us?" Wufei asked.

"Uh...I doubt I'm going to wear them. They were just in case. They're, uh, they're all pink or purple." The others grimaced. "Like I said, I don't think I'm going to wear them." Duo chuckled, and looked around. His smile fell, and he groaned.

"What?" Trowa asked, looking up. Duo made gestures with his hands around the room.

"Look at us!" he cried. He started to laugh. "We-we're sitting around like we're at a-a frickin'...sleepover or something! You know, slumber party! Yay! Girl talk, woo-hoo!" Duo said, laughing like it was insanely funny. The others looked around and groaned too.

"Geez, this gets worse and worse," Wufei mumbled. Heero and Trowa nodded while Quatre started chuckling with Duo and shaking his head.

"Guys!" came a shout from out of the room. It sounded like it came from downstairs. "Come eat dinner!"

"Coming!" all the boys shouted. They started to get up, but then stopped and blinked. "Coming?" they all asked, looking at each other.

"Don't we usually just...go?" Duo asked. The others nodded wearily.

"Don't worry guys. After tomorrow, we only have one more week to go," Quatre said, and the five trudged out of the room.

Downstairs:

"Coming?" Sally asked, glancing at Dorothy. "Don't they usually just...come?" Dorothy shrugged and gave a wry smile before continuing to make the salad for their meal.

* * *

There's actually a fantastic drawing that an artist named Graffiti drew for me years ago of the G-boys in their swimsuits. :) Since FFnet doesn't allow links, I'll give you directions to get there:

Go to my FFnet profile and click on the "homepage" link. Enter the main page (andtry to ignore theHarry/Draco layout if you're not a fan, lol). Go to fiction. Then Gundam Wing (second one down). Women Aren't Weak is the first fic on the list. Just click on it, and the title art is the pic I'm talking about. It makes me grin every time I see it, hehe. Enjoy!

-Maxine


	14. Chapter 13

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 13

* * *

"Ouch! Damn it!"

"Heero, I told you not to press down so hard."

"Shut up Quatre."

"He's just trying to help, Heero."

"Hn...damn it! Why does it bleed so much!" The morning after the GW Gang arrived at the beach house, Duo and Quatre had somehow managed to persuade Trowa and Heero to shave their legs since they were going to be in bathing suits. Um...let's just say it wasn't going to well, at least with Heero anyway...

"Heero, you're pressing down way too hard near you knees and ankles! That's the easiest place to cut yourself," Duo explained from his position on the floor. Heero and Trowa were both sitting on the side of the tub, while Duo and Quatre supervised. "Watch how Trowa does it."

"How come he's so good at it? And when did you become such a pro about all this?" Heero asked, pointing the razor in Duo's direction. He shrugged.

"Midii explained it all to us."

"And it really is not that difficult," Trowa added, calmly bringing the razor up his leg. "It just bleeds a lot because the cut is so near the surface of the skin." He examined the leg he had just finished. "Not bad," he said quietly, allowing a small smile to grace his face.

"Do you think our legs are going to be hairless when we're turned back into men?" Quatre asked, tilting his head thoughtfully. Heero's eyes widened.

"Shit, I hope not. I am never going through this again," he grumbled.

"The girls have do it almost every other day or something," Duo said, popping a piece of gum into his mouth.

"You're joking," Heero said, his eyes still wide.

"Nope, it's true. Cathy always takes longer in the bathroom when she has to shave," Trowa replied, hissing as he nicked himself. "Now I know why... Damn, it stings."

Heero snorted. "You think?"

"Hey, was Wufei gonna join us?" Trowa asked, finishing his other leg and rinsing off the razor. Duo shook his head.

"We're still working on him. He's as stubborn as a mule."

"Am I?" came a voice from the doorway.

"Yeah, you are," Duo snorted, not turning around.

"Well then, why am I dressed in these ridiculous clothes (shorts and a halter top, with his hair in a high ponytail. - don't ask me how they got him into that.), wearing a BRA, and actually putting a little bit of make-up on!" Wufei shouted, coming into the bathroom.

"Well, ah...if you'll do THAT much as a woman, why not just go all the way and shave?" Duo asked hopefully, holding up a razor.

"Why do you think I came in here?" Wufei mumbled, his cheeks going slightly pink. Duo's eyes lit up.

"Whoa, seriously? You're actually gonna shave? Sugoi!"

"Just shut up and give me the damn thing," Wufei growled, snatching the razor from Duo and taking Trowa's place on the side of the tub. He did just about as well as Heero did.

Sometime later, the guys trudged downstairs to find the girls. Wufei had changed into a pair of baggy jeans, and Heero had opted for a pair of capris, with Duo snickering at them the whole time. Duo and Trowa headed off towards the kitchen, while the other three sat down in the living room and began to watch T.V.

"What do you think we can eat without getting the girls all mad at us?" Duo asked, looking through every cabinet it the room. Trowa walked over to the table a picked up an apple from the bowl in the middle of it.

"I'm not that hungry," he said biting into the fruit. "This is fine for me." Duo glanced at the bowl, and reluctantly picked up an orange.

"I guess this'll have to do," he said glumly. He walked over to the screen door and looked out, trying to peel the skin off his orange. His eyes widened a little. "Hey, I found everyone," Duo said, pointing to the deck outside. All five girls were in their bathing suits already. Dorothy and Sally were lying on their stomachs, tanning, Relena was sitting on a beach chair reading a book, and Midii and Hilde were sitting on a blanket...painting their nails. They looked up when they heard a tapping on the glass, and smiled, waving for Duo and Trowa to come out. "Hey babe, whatcha doin'?" Duo asked coming out and plopping down on a chair. Trowa followed suit.

"What's it look like were' doing?" Hilde said, waving a thing of nail polish in front of his face. Duo wrinkled his nose at the smell.

"Man, that stuff smells. How can you wear it?"

"It doesn't smell that way after it dries, baka," Hilde said exasperatedly.

"Oh, well...whatever," Duo said, stuffing a piece of the orange into his mouth. Trowa bit into the apple, watching the girls paint their nails. All of a sudden, Hilde paused, and nudged Midii's foot. The blonde glanced up, and shared a look with Hilde who had gestured towards he and Duo with her head. There was a smirk on Hilde's face, and one was forming on Midii's as she nodded. Trowa suddenly felt the need to be far away from there.

"Duo, let's go inside," Trowa said, quickly standing up and pulling Duo with him.

"Wait," Hilde commanded. Trowa winced, while Duo just looked confused.

"What?" Duo asked. He shook his arm out of Trowa's grip, and turned to Hilde. The petite girl took Duo's hand that wasn't holding the orange in her own, looking over his fingers. Trowa began edging towards the door.

"Do you guys want a manicure?" Hilde asked, preparing herself for the way Duo would most likely reply. After a couple seconds, she realized that he hadn't answered at all, and looked up at him. She blinked. He looked like he was actually thinking about it, before he shook his head lightly.

"Geez, Hilde, what is it with you and make-up and hair styles and nails and all?" Hilde went a little pink.

"When I was younger, I always dreamed of owning a beauty salon," she answered truthfully. Duo nodded and looked towards Trowa who by now had his hand on the door.

"What do you say?" he asked him. Trowa froze.

"You're kidding right?" the stoic teen asked. "You're not seriously thinking of saying yes, are you?" Duo shrugged, and this time he was the one that blushed a little.

"I may be the only one, but I think it's sort of...neat to be a woman for a while. I wouldn't want to be one forever," he said quickly, when Trowa gave him an odd look, "but it's kind of cool to know what the other sex goes through. Well, some things are cool..." Duo grumbled, some of the unpleasant things about being a woman coming back to him. "But I figure, we only get this chance once, so why not go all out? You know?" He looked at Trowa pleadingly. Trowa sighed.

"Fine, but that stuff had better come off."

"Of course it does," Midii said, sorting through the various colors they had to see what would look best on them. She patted the extra space on the blanket. "Sit down guys." They did so, though a bit reluctantly.

"Man, Duo, now your hands are all sticky from that orange," Hilde said, frowning. She picked up a washcloth and began cleaning them off. Duo sat still for a while, and then began fidgeting.

"How long is this gonna take, Hil?"

"Don't even start, Duo," Hilde commanded, picking up a nail filer. Midii was doing the same thing for Trowa. Duo sighed and leaned back against a chair. This could take a while.

By the time their hands were done, Duo was wishing he had never agreed to this. How long could it possibly take? He was therefore very relieved when Hilde finished with his left hand, blowing on the paint to make it dry faster. Duo gave his hands a once-over, having a hard time admitting to himself that it actually looked pretty good. He was about to get up and leave, when Midii spoke up.

"Nope, don't go anywhere Mr. Maxwell...or Ms. Maxwell, which do you prefer?" she asked teasingly, looking up at him. He glared at her.

"Why can't I leave?" Duo asked.

"We haven't done your toes yet," Midii said, as if the answer was obvious. She yanked one of Trowa's feet out, ignoring the surprised look on his face.

"You're joking, right?" Trowa asked worriedly. Midii didn't hear him because she was too busy examining his leg.

"Did you shave?" she asked in wonder. Trowa blushed, and tried to pull his leg away, but Midii's grip was too strong.

"Maybe," Trowa mumbled, still blushing slightly. Midii chuckled. It was about that time that Dorothy woke up and glanced over to where she heard voices coming from.

"Omigosh," she said, sitting up. "Are you painting their nails?" she asked. Hilde and Midii both smiled and nodded at her. "I can't believe they're actually letting you."

"They did it willingly," Hilde said, smirking now. Duo and Trowa scowled at her. Dorothy chuckled. She stood up and stretched her arms up above her head. Duo's eyes widened slightly, noticing how much of her body was not covered (she has a suit like Trowa's, in case you forgot. So does Hilde - it said in the last chapter). Trowa's eyes widened too, but he looked more worried than awed. He was going to have to wear the same thing when they went down to the water. Hilde noticed the look on Duo's face and smacked him lightly on the arm. 'Still a male at heart,' she thought to herself, glaring at him as he scratched his head and gave her a sheepish smile.

"I'm going to find some more sunscreen. That bottle's almost empty," Dorothy said, walking off into the house. She heard voices coming from the living room and walked in that direction. She found Heero, Quatre, and Wufei lounging lazily on the couches. "Having fun?" Dorothy asked, crossing her arms and leaning against the doorway. The three in the room jumped slightly and glanced over at her.

"Yeah, looaad's of fun," Wufei replied sourly.

"Well, we're going down to the beach soon," Dorothy said, even though she had no idea if that was true or not. "So why don't you all go change?" The three looked at each other, and Heero turned the T.V. off.

"Where's Duo and Trowa?" Heero asked, raising his arms above his head to stretch. The movement caused his shirt to ride up, showing off half of his stomach. He blinked down at it, and then scowled, pulling the shirt back down.

"They're outside with the others," Dorothy said. She turned to walk down the hall, still in search of sunscreen. "I'll tell them to change too." They watched her walk off before walking slowly back to their room.

& & & &

Wufei was examining himself in the full length mirror in their bedroom, trying to decide whether he should leave his hair up or wear it down, when Trowa and Duo finally came into the room.

"Dang, that took forever, do you think they could have gone any slower?" Duo grumbled. He was looking at his hands. Trowa shrugged.

"I think they were having fun, and don't complain. It was YOUR idea."

"It was Hilde's idea," Duo protested. "I just agreed to it." It was about then that Wufei stomped over and grabbed one of Duo's hands, looking at it closely. Duo blinked. "Oh...h-hey Wu-man," he said semi-nervously.

"You let them paint your nails?" Wufei growled. "How pathetic can you get?"

"It's not like it's permanent or anything," Duo said, snatching his hand away from Wufei. He glared at him, and then noticed what he was wearing. "Are we going swimming?"

"Dorothy said we were probably going to go to the beach soon," Wufei explained, glancing down at his suit. He had a black wraparound thing on around his waste (A/N: Sorry guys, I completely blanked out on what those are called. It's the type of thing you wear with a bathing suit, you know? Instead of shorts or something...). "Do you think I should leave my hair up, or wear it down?" he asked. Duo blinked, before smirking and opening his mouth to make a smart comment. "Just answer the damn question," Wufei snapped, cutting Duo off before he could say a word. Duo shrugged.

"I think up," he said. Trowa nodded in agreement. Wufei turned back towards the mirror, and decided they were right; he'd leave his hair up. Suddenly, Heero came out of the bathroom, grumbling about something.

"Damn it...Wufei!" he yelled, looking around for the Chinese pilot.

"Right here, Yuy," Wufei said calmly from the other side of the room. Heero looked up and noticed Duo and Trowa standing there too.

"Could...could one of tie the straps of this thing? I can't get 'em right," Heero mumbled, glancing away and letting one hand drop to his side. The other was still holding his suit together.

"Yeah, come here," Trowa said. Heero walked over and turned around so Trowa could tie the straps.

"I'm not going anywhere near the water," Heero grumbled, crossing his arms once Trowa had finished. "This thing is going to come undone, I know it."

"Naw, Heero, girls wear those all the time. Nothing's going to happen. And mine ties too, but I'm going in the water. Come on, you can go in," Duo said, smiling. Heero looked doubtful, but didn't say anything. "I'm gonna go change then," Duo announced running to get his suit.

"Where's Quatre?" Trowa asked, noticing that the blonde was nowhere to be seen.

"With the girls, putting sunscreen on. He doesn't want to get burned," Wufei answered, giving a sideways glance to the mirror again.

"Wufei, you look beautiful! Now stop staring at your reflection," Duo said teasingly, returning with his suit in his hands. Wufei blushed and jerked his head away from the mirror.

"I wasn't staring," he said lamely. Duo rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, sure, WHATever. I'm going to change, but I'm probably gonna need one of you to tie the straps, ok? Be right back!" Duo then ran off to the bathroom.

"He's hyper again," Heero stated, as the three watched him go.

"What else is new?" Wufei said, sitting down to put on his flip-flops. No one answered.

About fifteen minutes later, Heero, Duo, Trowa, and Wufei, all ready to go to the beach, slowly made their way downstairs. Duo poked his head around the corner to see if there was anyone in the kitchen, and drew it back immediately.

"They're all there," he whispered to the others behind him. "I think they're waiting for us."

"Let's just go back upstairs and lock ourselves in the room," Trowa said desperately.

"Too late." All four jumped at the voice, and Duo poked his head around the wall again.

"H-hey Relena," he said, noticing she was standing right there.

"You guys have really lost your touch at sneaking around," Relena said, smiling at Duo.

"We have not! It's these damn shoes," Heero protested, his head appearing below Duo's in the doorway. His eyes widened slightly at Relena's suit, before going back to nuetral. Relena chuckled.

"Well, are you going to come out?" she asked, stepping back further into the room.

"Yeah, we want to see how you look," Sally added. "Hilde's the only one whose actually seen your suits."

"You have to swear not to laugh," Duo grumbled.

"Why would we laugh? Come on, Duo," Dorothy said.

"I feel naked," Duo mumbled. "And you won't be able to see our whole suits yet because we're all wearing shorts or those wraparound things.

"Well we can at least see the top," Midii said.

"Come out you guys, it's not that bad," Quatre spoke up.

"You have a damn one-piece!" Heero yelled. Quatre frowned.

"Do you see how low this thing goes?" he asked, pointing to his chest. "And there's practically no back. It's really not any better than yours." That was true... Duo took a deep breath and stepped into the doorway, giving them a full view of himself. It was quiet for a minute and Duo started fidgeting under their eyes.

"Looking good, Duo!" Midii said, giving him a thumbs up sign.

"Man, are you TRYING to make us look bad?" Sally joked. Relena, Hilde, and Dorothy were making catcalls in the background. Duo's face went bright red, but gradually he began to relax and smiled a little. Then, he suddenly began acting like a model in the doorway, doing all sorts of poses and waving to his "audience." This only increased the cheering of the girls as they also started laughing, and Duo ended his act by spinning around once and blowing a kiss to them. He then sauntered over and plopped down on a chair near Quatre, bending over the table and burying his face into his arms. His face was a little red again. Quatre just smirked and patted him on the back.

"How can he do that?" Heero whispered to the other three. They were all watching Duo in amazement, their eyes wide.

"Ok, who's next?" Dorothy called. All three remaining looked at each other.

"Let's just go out together. It's not like we have to put on a show like that baka," Wufei suggested. The other two nodded, and the three shuffled into the view of the girls.

"Wufei! Omigosh! I love your outfit!" Relena cried, running over to him and looking him over.

"Not fair," Dorothy said. "Trowa looks better than I do in this type of suit."

"Oh Heero, that is really pretty," Sally said sincerely. "I love the color." Heero just crossed his arms and sulked.

"Were we going to leave anytime soon?" he asked, visibly annoyed.

"Oh, yeah, sorry," Relena said, picking up some of the towels. Quatre grabbed the cooler that had been sitting on the table, and the others grabbed more towels while Dorothy picked up a bag filled with sunscreen, books, sunglasses, and other miscellaneous items you would bring to the beach. "Let's go!" Relena walked out the door, the girls right behind her and the guys following somewhat reluctantly. This was going to be on hell of a day...

* * *

Hehe, I'm so mean to them! ;)

-Maxine


	15. Chapter 14

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 14

* * *

"Are you EVER going to in the water Heero?"

"Iie."

"Not at all?"

"Nope."

"Are you SUUURE?"

"I'm absolutely positive."

"Absolutely positutely?"

"For the last time, Duo. I. Am. Not. Going. In. To. The. WATER!"

"... For real?" Heero snapped his eyes open and growled, his hands clenching the towel beneath him. Beside him, Duo was lying out on his own towel, attempting to get a tan. Heero, lying on his stomach, would have been content to just stay in the same position for the whole day, but a certain braided teen wouldn't leave him alone.

"What must I say to make it clear to you?" Heero asked, turning his head so he was facing the source of his annoyance.

"But Heero! I'm sooo booooored!" Duo whined pitifully.

"Then go see if someone else will go in with you."

"I already did."

"Did they refuse also?"

"No, they're already in the water." Heero drew in a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself down.

"They WHY aren't you with them?"

"Well they're not ALL in the water." Duo raised a hand to shade his eyes and squinted so he could make out who was already out there. "Let's see... Quatre's there, he actually WANTED to come here. Sally's with him, along with Midii and Dorothy. And...Relena's out over that way," he said gesturing to the right.

"Where's everyone else?" Heero asked uninterestedly.

"Hilde doesn't want to go in yet. I already bugged her. She's reading or something. And Trowa and Wufei are hiding out under the umbrella thingy. I think they're both afraid to be seen in only their bathing suits." Despite the big fuss he'd made at the store, Duo had been the first to strip down to just his suit when they'd arrived at the beach. Quatre had soon followed, and then Heero, both not caring about anything anymore. Heero snorted at what Duo had said about Wufei and Trowa, and then closed his eyes again. "Well, are you SURE you won't come in?" Duo asked again, standing up. Heero just nodded.

"Positive." Duo sighed.

"Fine." He started to walk away, and paused and turned back around. Quietly as he could, he walked back over to Heero. 'Well, if he's going to be such a big grump about everything,' Duo thought, 'then I'll just have to teach him a little lesson. Hehehe.' He knelt down slowly and lowered his hands to the strings that held Heero's suit together. He managed to get a hold of them without Heero noticing, when-

"Don't even think about it." Duo gasped and fell backwards onto his butt in the sand. Okaaay, so maybe he HAD noticed.

"Uh, hehe, sorry Heero. I'll just be going now," Duo said nervously, before dashing off down the beach. Heero watched him go with one eye, and then reached up behind him to make sure the strings were still tied. Satisfied, he resumed his lightly dozing state.

& & & &

"This is pathetic."

A sigh. "Yes it is."

"Look at them! Bunch of weaklings."

"Actually, Wufei, they're braver than us. At least they're out there."

"...shove it, Trowa." Pause. "Well, Yuy isn't out there."

"No, but Heero DID manage to get out of the extra clothing. We have yet to do THAT."

"...I never said I wouldn't do that. I just...didn't feel the need to yet."

"Well, I'll do it if you do it."

"Ok... You first."

"Nuh-uh, I'm the one in the bikini."

"...How about at the same time, then?"

"...Alright. On the count of three."

"Ok. Ready?"

"...yeah."

"Ok then..." Trowa and Wufei both stopped, each waiting for the other to start counting.

"You guys are sad," a new voice spoke. Wufei and Trowa glanced over at Heero who had one eye open and was watching them. The rest of his face was buried in his arms, but it if you looked closely, you could see a ghost of an amused smile playing on his lips. Wufei and Trowa blushed.

"Shut up," Wufei grumbled, glancing away.

"But you are!" Heero insisted, his smile growing a little wider. "Look around! Do you see how many other girls there are here? You two probably attract more attention than them wearing MORE than your bathing suits," he said bluntly. Wufei began grumbling again, and then abruptly stood up and yanked the sarong he was wearing off. (A/N: Thanks to all of you who reminded me what those were called! You know who you are! I really appreciated it.)

"There, happy?" He didn't wait for an answer and started muttering about "baka women clothes." Trowa sighed and slid the cut-off shorts he was wearing off, and then stood up and stretched slightly.

"I could care less," Heero said, answering Wufei's question. "But I think you just made their day." He pointed to something behind the two teens. Both turned around and found three boys staring at them through wide eyes. Trowa flushed slightly again, and sat down abruptly.

"Ugh, I think they were drooling," he muttered. Suddenly, Hilde started giggling from her spot on the other side of Trowa. He jumped slightly, having forgotten she was there.

"Reading something funny, onna?" Wufei asked. Hilde ignored the "onna" part.

"No, but you guys are hilarious," she replied. "I've been stuck on this one page for the past ten minutes because I keep listening to you guys talk."

"Well, I'm glad we're so entertaining," Wufei sulked. He brought his knees up to his chest and rested his arms on them, attempting to block out Hilde's laughter while staring out at the sea. "How long have we been here?"

"Um...almost an hour," Hilde replied.

"That's it!" Wufei shouted. Next to him, Trowa groaned.

"Damn..." he mumbled. "We've got a long time to go."

"We'll last," Wufei said, sounding very determined. Trowa nodded, but he looked doubtful.

Thirty minutes later:

"It is so HOT!" Wufei complained, rubbing an arm across his forehead to rid it of the sweat there.

"And humid," Trowa added, fanning himself with his hand.

"Well, if you two would actually go in the water, I'm sure you'd cool off fast," Hilde suggested, not looking at all bothered by the heat. Wufei and Trowa glanced out at the sea longingly, and then looked at each other.

"Actually, it's not TOO bad out," Wufei said quickly. "I can deal."

"Yeah," Trowa agreed after a few seconds. "I'm...ok." Hilde snorted and continued reading.

'They have to go in SOMETIME,' she thought.

& & & &

Drip.

Drip.

Drip.

Duo's long hair was soaking wet as he made his way back up the beach. He'd considered wringing it out, but an idea had occurred to him. Glancing up ahead to his destination, he smirked when he noticed that his suspect hadn't seen him coming yet.

'Too bad for him,' Duo thought. He smiled widely and waved at the others who were sitting on their towels or in chairs. Hilde returned the smile, along with a wave, but Wufei and Trowa barely lifted their hands in greeting.

"Hey guys! Have you decided to go in yet?" Duo asked. "The water's great, and the waves are huge!" Hilde closed her book and stood up.

"Yeah, I think I will go in," she said, but Duo wasn't paying attention to her. He was tiptoeing over to a sleeping Heero. "Duo?" Hilde asked.

"Shhhh," Duo replied, holding a finger to his lips.

"Duo, what are you planning now?" Hilde asked exasperatedly. Duo didn't answer. Instead, he hauled his long braid over his shoulder and held it over Heero's back. Duo clucked his tongue.

"Tsk, tsk. He's gonna have one hell of a sunburn," he commented lightly, before wringing out his hair, letting the cold water fall over Heero's back. Heero's eyes snapped open wide and he yelped, arching his back in an attempt to get away from the cold liquid. It took him a few seconds to remember where he was, and the first thing he clearly recognized was Duo's laughter.

"Duo!" Hilde shouted, her eyes widening at what he had just done. Next to her, Wufei burst out laughing and Trowa allowed a smile to grace his face.

"He's gonna kick your ass, Maxwell!" Wufei cried, smiling widely at the thought.

"Duo," Heero growled, slowing the pushing himself off the ground. Duo stood his ground and smirked into Heero's face.

"Just thought I'd cool you off. You looked a little hot, babe," Duo said, putting a sarcastic accent on the word "babe."

"I, like, totally agree!" some random guy who had been walking down the beach commented.

"Except she STILL looks hot!" said someone else. Another guy from the same group whistled, and then the whole group started laughing among themselves. Heero glanced around bewilderedly, wondering where the increase in male population had suddenly come from. Duo also looked a little shocked, but he came to his senses quickly.

"Hey! Back off! H-uh-SHE's already taken!" he shouted, hoping that that, along with a glare, would make the group of guys go away.

"Well, would you like to share?" asked one of the beach bums. Duo's eyes widened.

"Not by me!" he screeched, taking several steps back. "He has, uh, um, a, uh," Duo stuttered.

"A boyfriend," Hilde said coolly. "So I suggest you back off." She glared at the group, having dealt with things like this before. Suddenly, she smiled. "They're free, though," she said, pointing with her thumb behind her. Trowa and Wufei looked around, wondering whom Hilde was talking about, before realizing that she was pointing at them.

"NO WE'RE NOT!" they yelled at the same time. Hilde chuckled, as did the beach guys before they walked off down to the water.

"And Duo gets us into yet ANOTHER mess," Heero said sarcastically, sitting back down on his towel.

"What! I didn't do anything! THIS mess is Wufei's fault!" Duo exclaimed, pointing at himself, well, more at his chest, when he said that. Wufei blushed slightly and looked away. Heero just shrugged.

"They were kinda cute," Hilde commented, watching the group of guys walk down the beach.

"Are you crazy!" Duo shouted. Hilde sighed, and glanced at her, uh, boyfriend. "Don't look at me like that!" he yelled self-consciously.

"Well, I'm gonna go swimming now. You coming?" Hilde asked.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah!" Duo said, jumping up and down like a little kid. "How about you guys?" he asked, turning to the others.

"Nope," Heero answered, looking away.

"I'm going."

"Trowa!" Wufei shouted.

"Wufei, it is way too hot. I'm going swimming," Trowa said, standing up and brushing the sand off of him. Wufei sighed in defeat.

"Fine."

"Ok, Heero, now you have to go!" Duo said.

"No I don't," was the reply he got.

"Heeeero, come on Heero! You know you want to."

"Not really." Duo sighed and glanced out at the water.

"Hey...where's Relena?" he asked, looking around. "I don't see her in the water anymore, but she's not here..." Heero was on his feet in a flash, looking around frantically. "Oh wait, that's right. She and Midii went to get some ice cream. Silly me!" Duo said, slapping his forehead with his palm. Heero glared at him. "Well, now that you're up, you can come with us!" Heero groaned.

"You just don't give up, do you?" he asked, annoyed.

"Not usually," Duo returned with a smile.

"Fine, I'll go in. There, are you happy?" Not waiting for an answer, Heero stomped off down the beach. The small group watched him go.

"I am THE best," Duo said, looking really smug. He held out his hand to Wufei and Trowa. "I believe you each owe me ten bucks. I got him to go in the water." Trowa frowned and Wufei started grumbling to himself.

"It's back at the house," Trowa said. "I'll give it to you later."

"Same here," said Wufei.

"Duo Maxwell! You made a bet on that?" Hilde asked, yanking on Duo's braid.

"Uh...hehe, maybe? Hilde, babe, could you let go? That really hurts!" Duo whined. Hilde sighed and let go.

"I don't know why I put up with you," she said, smiling.

"You know you love me," Duo said, lowering his head out of instinct. Hilde leaned back and put a hand on Duo's shoulder to push him away.

"Heh, I don't think so," she said. "Not when you're in THAT body." She turned and walked down the beach.

"Aw, damn it!" Duo exclaimed. He looked at Trowa and Wufei who were both smirking. "Shut up and come on," he snapped, taking Hilde's lead. The trio trudged down to the water.

& & & &

"Hey guys! It's about time you came in!" Quatre exclaimed, running up to meet Duo and the others.

"Yeah, it took me a while, but I finally got them to come," Duo said, looking very proud of himself. Trowa and Wufei narrowed their eyes and brushed passed them towards Heero who was standing at the water's edge.

"They don't seem very happy," Quatre commented.

"Heh, they're not." Duo reached up and scratched his behind his head. He looked towards the right and saw Hilde heading towards Dorothy and Sally, who were both boogie-boarding in the waves.

"Come on," Quatre said, tugging lightly on Duo's arm. They walked down to where Heero, Trowa, and Wufei were standing. "What are you guys looking at?" he asked. Heero crossed his arms and shivered slightly.

"The water is freezing," he growled.

"Is it?" Quatre stepped into the water. "I guess I'm used to it," he said, shrugging.

"Yeah, same here," Duo agreed. Then he smiled evilly. Before anyone could figure out what he was doing, Duo grabbed Wufei's arm and sprinted into the waves, dragging the shocked Chinese teen with him.

"AHHHH! Maxwell! Kisaaamaaaa!" he screamed, jumping around in the waist-high water. Frantically, he rubbed his hands up and down his arms, and then gave up all together, submerging himself totally in the water. He broke through the surface again, gasping, his teeth chattering. "I-it's s-s-so c-c-cold."

"Aw, it's not THAT bad," Duo said, slapping Wufei on the back. Wufei glared at him, but Duo ignored it. "Come on guys!" he yelled to three still on the shore. Quatre eagerly made his way towards them. Trowa and Heero followed reluctantly, at a much slower pace. By the time they reached them, their teeth were also chattering. "If you guys would go all the way under, it wouldn't be so cold," Duo suggested to Trowa and Heero, who were still dry from the waist up.

"No thanks,' Trowa said, rubbing his arms. Heero nodded in agreement, and then his eyes widened.

"Uh, I don't think we have much of a choice," he said, pointing to something behind the others. They all turned around to see a HUGE wave about to crash right on top of them.

"Shit," Wufei muttered, right before the wave poured over the five. When the water leveled again, Trowa and Heero were gasping for air. "I guess it's not TOO bad," Wufei said, walking around a little. He spread out his arms and twirled them through the water. Trowa also got over the temperature of the water and dove into it, going right through another wave that was about to crash on top of them again.

"I haven't been to a beach in forever," he said, swimming around. "I love swimming." Heero took Trowa's lead, and also swam out to deeper water. The five hung out in the deep water for a while, before gradually making their way inland.

"See guys, this is fun, isn't it?" Quatre asked, a wide smile covering his face.

"I think it's great!" Duo exclaimed. The other three just sort of shrugged. They were halfway back to the shore, and decided to stay in the shallower water for a little while. "Hey, Quat?" Duo said, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Yeah, Duo?"

"It's a bit nipply out, doncha think?" Duo said, smiling mischievously. Quatre just looked totally confused.

"Huh?" he said. Duo sighed overdramatically.

"I SAID: It's. A. Bit. NIPPLY. Out. Don't you think?" he said, stressing the important words. Quatre blinked.

"Nipply? Duo, what are you talking about?" Duo chuckled slightly and shook his head slowly.

"It's one of those girl codes, Quatre," Trowa said. "Sort of like, it's snowing in BRA-zil. Cathy uses them."

"Snowing in Brazil?"

"It means your bra strap is showing," Heero said bluntly. "Even I could figure that one out." Quatre flushed slightly.

"Oh... What about the other one?" Duo sighed again, and bent down to whisper something to Quatre, who immediately turned a darker red and crossed his arms over his chest. "Oh yeah," he laughed nervously, "I remember my sisters saying that." Wufei opened his mouth to say something, but before he could get the words out, Quatre's eyes widened and pointed at something behind him. "Another wave, guys! Watch out!" He didn't get the warning out fast enough though, because the wave crashed and knocked all five boys off their feet. As Wufei struggled to sit up, something landed across his face with a wet smack, blocking his vision. He yelped, and clawed at it, trying to get it off since he had no idea what it was.

"AHHH! Get if off, get it off!" he screeched, quite pathetically. Wufei finally managed to get it off, and held it out in front of him. One eyebrow raised as he noticed it was a familiar looking...blue...and black...tankini top. "Uh...Heero?" The top was snatched out of his hands by a very red-faced Heero, who wasted no time in attempting to put it back on. Wufei snickered.

"Damn it, Wufei, it's not funny! Didn't I tell you? I KNEW it would come off!" Heero grumbled, fumbling with the strings on the back of his suit. "Trowa!" he yelled, giving up with the strings. Trowa immediately tied them up for him, trying to hide the small smile that had formed at his face. Duo and Quatre watched this whole scene through wide eyes, before Duo suddenly burst out laughing.

"HAHA! Oh man, Heero. That was too funny! I didn't actually think it'd come off! HAHAHA!" Heero, still blushing, felt his eyes well up with tears for some unknown reason, but before any of them could fall, he snapped back to his usual self.

"Omae o korosu, Duo," he growled. Duo stopped laughing abruptly and his eyes widened.

"Me! What did I do?" he asked, jumping to his feet to sprint away. Heero grabbed his braid and gave it a hard yank before he could go anywhere, though. His other hand came up to the tie around Duo's neck.

"How would you like it if YOUR top came off, huh? THEN would you be laughing!"

"Ack! Heero! Nonono! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have laughed! Don't untie it, PLEEEAASSE!"

"Heero, stop!" Quatre yelled, putting a hand on Heero's shoulder. "Duo didn't mean anything. And besides, no one saw anything!" Heero reluctantly let go off Duo, who backed several steps away, and looked at Quatre.

"Are you sure?" he asked, looking around doubtfully. He glanced down and straightened out his top.

"Woo-hoo!" someone yelled. "Now THAT was a nice view! Can we see it again, babe!" Heero's head snapped up, and he noticed the same group of guys who had been bothering him earlier standing up on the shore. Before he could yell back at them, they all walked off again. Heero glared at Quatre.

"Uh...eh-heh. Well, maybe a FEW people saw..." Heero didn't answer and stomped the rest of the way out of the water towards the girls, who were all back at their towels.

"Uh, I have a feeling Heero won't be coming in anymore this vacation," Duo said, feeling a little sorry for the Japanese youth.

"Come on," Trowa said, following Heero up the beach. "We've been here a while. Maybe the girls are ready to leave." Wufei, Quatre, and Duo looked at each other, and then ran to catch up with the others.

& & & &

"Heero, what's wrong?" Relena asked, pulling her sunglasses down over her nose to look at him. She was lounging on a chair they had brought with them.

"...don't wanna talk about it..." Heero mumbled. He grabbed his towel off the ground and shook it out, sending sand all over the girls.

"Ack!"

"Hey, watch where you shake that thing!

"Heero!"

"Don't do that!"

"Aw, yuck! There's sand in my drink! Ewwww."

"Oops," Heero said halfheartedly. He wrapped the towel around himself. Relena turned her gaze from him to the other four who were coming towards them.

"What happened?" she asked quietly. The four looked at each other. Trowa shrugged.

"Heero's top flew off when a wave hit us," he said, looking sympathetic. Hilde promptly choked on her coke as the other girls gasped.

"Oi, I didn't think that would actually happen. You only READ about those type of things," Hilde said. "Sorry Heero." The others nodded.

"I don't want your sympathy," Heero growled. "I'm fine! It was nothing I couldn't handle."

"Ok Heero, if your sure..." Relena said doubtfully.

"I am."

"Hey," Dorothy spoke up. "It's almost four. I say we go back now and catch an early dinner. Then we can go do something tonight."

"I agree," Wufei said immediately. "Let's go. I've had enough salt water for one day."

"Yeah, and I think I'm sunburned enough for one day"

"All that sunscreen we put on you, and you STILL burnt?" Midii asked Quatre. He nodded.

"Well then, let's go!" Sally announced. She started gathering their things, and soon the group was walking back to their house.

"So, what did you have in mind for tonight?" Trowa asked.

"You mean for dinner, or afterwards?" Dorothy replied.

"Afterwards." Dorothy smirked.

"Oh I'm sure we can think of _something_," she said, sharing a look with Sally and Hilde. All three girls smiled evilly. "And I assure you, it WILL be fun."

* * *

Hum-de-dum. :) Only a few chapters left!

-Maxine


	16. Chapter 15

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 15

* * *

"You've got to be kidding me." Quatre looked from the outfit that was laid out on the bed to the girls in the doorway, and back again incredulously. "You want me to wear _that..._in PUBLIC?"

"Uh...w-well...yeah," Hilde stuttered. "Why? Don't you like it?" Quatre looked at her like she was crazy.

"NO I don't LIKE it! Look, I've put up with a lot this last week, but this is going too far! Where would I even wear something like THAT!"

"You haven't put up with jack shit, Quat," Duo said, stepping out of the bathroom in his new ensemble. "I mean, you had a one-piece bathing suit, you didn't get into any guy trouble, you never got your period..." Duo trailed off and frowned. "Actually, absolutely NOTHING embarrassing happened to you this week. That's so not fair..."

"Duo?" Trowa asked from Wufei's top bunk. "What the HELL are you wearing?" Duo blushed and looked down at himself.

"Oh, well you see...um...they told me to wear it!" he exclaimed, pointing to the girls who were still standing in the doorway. "And I'm tired of arguing! To hell with it all!"

"Well I think it looks good, Duo," Sally spoke up.

"Why thank you," Duo replied, curtsying slightly. He was wearing skin tight, black leather flares with a royal blue tube top that left nothing to the imagination. A silver choker adorned his neck, while several other silver bracelets hung from his wrists. His hair was in its normal braid. Quatre groaned.

"Fine! Since Duo's wearing...THAT...I guess I'll wear this... But did you have to choose PINK? I'll look like a life size Barbie doll!"

"Heh, that was the point," Dorothy said, shoving Quatre into the bathroom before he could retort.

"Hey guys, how does this look?" Relena asked, entering the room. Wufei followed at a much slower pace, with Midii behind him, occasionally giving him a slight push to keep him going.

"We thought Wufei's swim suit looked great earlier, so we decided to just go with that look again." Midii said, looking at the Chinese teen. Wufei scowled, and looked around the room to see who all was there. He was dressed almost the same as Duo, only his top was deep red and his jewelry was gold. His hair was pulled into a high ponytail.

"I hate acting like a big doll for them to dress up," Wufei commented to Heero, as he walked over to stand by him. The trigger-happy teen just nodded in response.

"Ok, who's next?" Midii exclaimed, clapping her hands together. Trowa and Heero both looked at each other and groaned, before following the two blondes out of the room.

"Where are we going anyway?" Duo asked, plopping down on a bed to pull on his black platforms. Hilde glanced at Sally, who in return looked towards Dorothy.

"I guess we can tell them now," Dorothy shrugged. "We're going clubbing." Duo paused, and both he and Wufei blinked.

"Uh, eh-heh, excuse me? Dost my ears deceive me? Did you just say we're going...clubbing? As in...at a dance club? Dancing? Where there are tons of other drunk GUYS? Have you, by any chance, gone completely insane?" Duo asked calmly. Wufei, on the other hand...

"WHAAAT? Baka onnas! I REFUSE to go to a stupid dance club!"

"But Wufei! You're already dressed for it! Come on, we won't go for TOO long," Sally said.

"Yeah, Duo. You can deal with one more thing as a woman. And we'll keep all those drunk guys away from you," Hilde teased.

"Not funny," Duo snapped.

"I really don't like this you guys," Quatre said angrily as he stepped out of the bathroom. Duo tore his glare away from Hilde to see what the blonde was wearing. Both of his eyebrows shot up.

"Whoa, Quat! Um...wow, ok. Can I call you Skipper?"

"Shut up," Quatre growled. He stepped more into the room, wearing a white miniskirt and a tight, hot pink halter-top. On his feet were a pair of Relena's pink platform sandals. His blonde hair fell in natural curls down his back and framed his face. Before anyone could say much else, Heero and Trowa returned to the room with Relena and Midii close behind.

"Have you figured out where we're going yet?" Trowa asked. He was wearing a pair of low-riding jean flares and a shirt similar to Quatre's, only it was forest green and covered in gold glitter. It didn't cover his whole stomach, so some of it was showing. He also had on several gold bracelets, and his naturally curly hair had also been left down.

"Yeah," Heero added. He jutted a thumb over his shoulder. "They wouldn't tell us." He had on a baby blue T-shirt that had the word "Angel" printed across the front in royal blue, sparkling letters. It had a low neck and fitted him tightly, riding up slightly to show his stomach. The jeans he was wearing were similar to Trowa's, except they were a darker blue. His hair was pulled back into a half ponytail.

"Hey! How come everyone else gets to wear pants?" Quatre complained.

"Um, helloo? I'm wearing a skirt," Hilde said.

"Yeah, same here," Midii added. Duo ignored them and answered Trowa instead.

"We're going to some dance club or something," he said. Heero, Trowa, and Quatre went deathly silent.

"Pardon?" Trowa finally said. Heero and Quatre just groaned.

"Well guys, now that you're all ready, let's go!" Sally said, dashing out the door before anyone else could question where they were going. Duo followed her.

"This. Sucks. Ass," he mumbled. None of the other guys seemed to disagree with him.

& & & &

Some time later, the group walked into a dance club located on the boardwalk of the beach. As soon as they made it through the door, they could feel the floor vibrating from the volume of the music that was pouring out of the speakers. A barrage of smells hit them, ranging from smoke to alcohol to cheap perfume and everything else. It was great, or the girls thought so anyway, smiling widely and eagerly shoving their way towards the dance floor.

"Um, guys? It just occurred to me, that we're only seventeen, so we can't even legally drink yet, and um...well..." Quatre trailed off, glancing around warily.

"Quat, don't worry so much. Sally took care of it," Duo said, unconsciously starting to move with the beat of the music. A small smile was working its way onto his face.

"What do you mean? She's only nineteen," Quatre replied.

"Keep it down, will ya?" Duo snapped quietly. "You don't need to announce it to everybody. She got us fake I.Ds."

"Yeah, by taking advantage of Preventor resources," Wufei snorted. Quatre's eyes widened.

"And they all agreed to this? Even Relena?"

"Apparently," Duo mumbled, not really paying attention.

"She's on vacation," Heero spoke up. "Remember?"

"Oh," Quatre said meekly.

"And did you see that sign?" Duo asked excitedly. "Once we're in, we can get drinks without I.Ds. This is supposed to strictly be a twenty-one and older bar."

"I hope we don't get caught."

"Stop worrying, Quatre!"

"Maybe Relena didn't even know," Trowa mused.

"Do you know where they went?" Quatre asked, peering out into the crowd.

"Who cares," Wufei muttered, heading towards the bar.

"There they are!" Duo shouted, pushing his way through the crowd. Heero and Trowa turned to follow Wufei. Quatre stood uncertainly for a moment before rushing to catch up with the guys at the bar. When he finally got there, he plopped down on one of the stools next to Trowa.

"Quatre," Trowa said, not looking up from his drink. "I thought you went with Duo. What took you so long?"

"Well I got lost in the crowd, and I got pinched by those guys over there about five times! They kept calling me Barbie!" Quatre complained, his face bright red from embarrassment.

"You got pinched?" Trowa repeated faintly.

"Um...yeah, you know..." Quatre paused to brush some hair back from his face. "I didn't realize how crude some men can be." Trowa just shook his head at the naivety of the young blonde. "What are you drinking?" Quatre asked suddenly, looking at the glass Trowa was holding. Trowa shrugged.

"Dunno, I just asked for something strong, and they gave me this. It's actually pretty good."

Quatre was quiet for a second before he said, "Order me one."

& & & &

Elsewhere in the club Duo had completely forgotten his current condition and was dancing wildly with the music. Hilde, Sally, and Dorothy were with him, but Relena and Midii had wandered off somewhere in the crowd. The four of them were sweating from every pore by now, but were having a blast. Duo hair was coming out of his braid and sticking to the sides of his face, but he totally ignored it. He was so detached from everything that he didn't notice when a pair of masculine arms wrapped around his waist, pulling him close. In fact, he just started grinding with the body behind him without a care in the world. It wasn't until the volume of the music lowered so an announcement could be made about some contest that Duo registered the rock hard body behind him. He instantly froze, wondering how the hell he had gotten into this position. One of the hands wrapped around his waist traced across his stomach and down the outside of his thigh, causing Duo's eyes to widen.

"Shit!" he exclaimed, breaking out of the hold he was in. He whirled around to look at whom he'd been dancing with. The man was obviously stark drunk, because, he was blinking bewilderedly down at his hands wondering where the beautiful woman he'd just been dancing with had gone. Duo didn't even hang around to slap him, though he felt he should have. Instead, he glanced around wondering where Hilde and them had wondered off to. 'Maybe they're at the bar,' he thought to himself. Pushing through the crowd, he made his way to where he thought the others were.

& & & &

"Did you see how he was dancing with that guy?" Hilde whispered, still mingling in the crowd with Dorothy and Sally.

"Unbelievable," Dorothy whispered back.

"I don't think he even realized it," Sally spoke up.

"And damned if that guy wasn't freakin' hot!" Hilde exclaimed.

"Yeah, go figure," Dorothy mumbled.

"Did you see the look on his face though, when Duo broke away from him," Hilde laughed.

"Yeah!" Sally said, laughing too. "He was so drunk he didn't even realize him standing right in front of him. It was pathetic!"

"I'm surprised Duo didn't notice in the first place," Dorothy said, looking thoughtful. "Him being a Gundam pilot and all. He's supposed to have great senses or something." Hilde shrugged.

"They do half the time, but the other half...well, let's just say Duo can be as clueless as a brick sometimes."

"Oh, and just when does THIS happen?" Sally asked playfully, nudging Hilde in the ribs with her elbow. The smaller girl blushed.

"Don't make me say it," she said, smirking. "I believe you can figure it out." The three laughed and continued dancing.

& & & &

"No."

"Please?"

"Nu-uh."

"Come on, how many times are you going to make me ask you?"

"Hn."

"I'm not going to give up."

"You're wasting your breath."

"Babe, come on, just ONE dance."

_Smack. _"Do NOT call me babe," Heero growled at the guy's back as he finally walked away, holding his cheek. Heero just sighed looking down at his hand. "I never thought I'd be the one doing the hitting," he mumbled. Wufei snorted at him.

"You should have smacked him ten minutes ago when he first asked you," the Chinese teen mumbled, sipping some of his drink.

"Hn."

"Hey guys!" Heero and Wufei groaned, turning to look at the braided beauty who bounced up to the bar they were at. Wufei blinked his eyes a few times, trying to get rid of the double of Duo that had suddenly appeared in his vision. "Man, you guys should really be out on the dance floor. They're playing some AWESOME music. I like, totally forgot who I was for a while," Duo babbled, plopping down on a seat next to Heero.

"Hooray for you," Heero deadpanned. He drank the rest of his drink in one gulp and slammed the glass down on the counter. "Gimme another one," he told the bartender who was standing in front of him. His voice was beginning to slur.

"Are you sure? That's your fifth one," the man said, looking warily at the girl in front of him. He'd seen how she slapped that one guy.

"I said, gimme another one!" Heero growled, reaching for his gun. Unfortunately, he discovered it wasn't there. "Damn it..."

"Heero, Heero, Heero," Duo sighed. "I never thought I'd see you like this. We haven't even been here an hour yet!" Heero just glared at him. Beside him, Wufei slammed his glass down on the bar too.

"One more over here too," he demanded. Duo sighed again, and stood up.

"I think I'm gonna go talk to Trowa and Quat," he said, walking quickly down to the opposite side of the bar. He found them in the same condition as Wufei and Heero. In fact, Quatre was probably worse.

"Hi Duo!" the blonde boy-turned-girl chirped. "Where've you been?"

"I was dancing," Duo said warily, glancing at Trowa. He just shrugged.

"Don't look at me. He's only had two drinks."

"Man, what are you guys drinking?" Duo asked incredulously.

"We don't know!" Quatre chirped again. "It's really good though! Here, try some!" He shoved his drink into Duo's face. Duo instinctively took a step back before taking the drink that had been thrust at him. He sniffed it warily, and then took a tentative sip. It burned the back of his throat as he swallowed it, and he made a face.

"Not bad...really strong though," Duo said, handing it back Quatre.

"That's what we asked for," Trowa said.

"Oooooh, look! There's Dorothy! Let's go dance with them!" Quatre said excitedly, jumping off his seat.

"I wanted something to drink though," Duo whined. Quatre shrugged.

"Come on then, Trowa!" Without waiting for him to answer, Quatre grabbed his arm and dragged him off the stool.

"Ack! Wait! Duo, help!" Trowa screeched, trying to get back to the bar. But Quatre proved to have an unnaturally strong grip. Duo just waved as Trowa was dragged off into the crowd. Not wanting to sit by himself, he moved back down the bar to where Wufei and Heero were. They were busy talking to someone else though, and Duo couldn't help smirking at their conversation.

"Damn it, I said no!" Heero exclaimed, glaring out of the corner of his eye at another guy who had come to pester him.

"Here, I'll buy you a drink," the guy said hopefully.

"The drinks are free!" Heero yelled, turning to look, er, GLARE at the guy head on. That was a mistake. Unlike the previous guy, this one was actually good looking. VERY good looking, with his deep blue eyes and naturally blonde hair. He obviously was at the beach often, probably a surfer since he was tan and had bulky muscles. Heero's eyes widened slightly, and he gulped unconsciously.

Beside him, Wufei noticed this and started quoting Duo from earlier, murmuring, "Swapping spit under the stars," as he drank from his newly refilled glass. Heero heard him, and instantly turned away from the guy, his eyes hardening.

"Well fine. As much as I hate to be turned down by a pretty woman, I can deal." The guy stood up and walked away, or so Heero thought until he sat down on the other side of Wufei, where Duo had been standing. "How about you?" Wufei choked on his drink as it went down the wrong tube.

"Smooth move, Wu-man," Duo mumbled, pounding on his back. He was leaning on the bar in between Wufei and Heero, since the other guy had taken his seat.

"Excuse me?" Wufei said, once he recovered.

"Wanna dance?" the man asked again.

"Eh, I don't think so."

"Seriously?"

"Oh yeah."

"Man, I don't think I've ever been turned down so many times," the guy mumbled. He looked over at Duo.

"What about you? Would YOU like to dance with me?" Duo looked up from the drink he had ordered.

"Who, me? Oh, I just got back from the dance floor, so I'm kind of tired right now. Maybe later?" he said, smiling sweetly. The blonde guy nodded.

"Works for me." He didn't go anywhere though, and instead ordered a drink from the bar. Wufei and Heero gaped at Duo.

"What?" he asked defensively.

"That guy asked me about fifteen times, and he only asked you once before backing off," Heero said. "How do you do that?" Duo blushed.

"Well, eh-heh, that's the excuse I usually get from girls when I bother them," he said, lowering his voice so no one else would hear. Wufei smirked.

"Go figure," he mumbled.

The guy hung around for almost fifteen minutes, but when Duo showed no signs of getting up to dance again, he finally left. The three released a collective sigh of relief, but unfortunately the seat was not left empty long. A tall, lanky, blonde woman with forest green eyes that matched Trowa's sat down as soon as the other man stood up. Simultaneously, another woman with clear blue eyes and short black hair leaned onto the bar on the other side of Heero. Duo, Wufei, and Heero eyed them suspiciously.

"We saw how you handled those men," the blonde said, her voice deep and husky.

"Veeery impressive," said the other one. The guys said nothing, but the women continued, undeterred.

"So we came to a conclusion," the blonde said again, leaning over as if to spread some juicy gossip. The movement allowed an ample amount of cleavage to show.

"And what would that be?" Duo asked, seemingly uninterested. The two girls shared a look and smirked.

"Wanna dance?" asked the blonde, lowering her voice a notch.

"Excuse me?" Wufei coughed as his eyes shot wide open.

"You know," the blue-eyed woman said teasingly. She trailed one of her manicured fingernails up the back a very shocked Heero. "We could do some frrreeak-dancing," she continued, leaning into Heero and smacking her lips as if she was about to eat some gourmet food. The weight of her body caused Heero to snap back to reality, and he abruptly jumped off the bar stool, his eyes wide. Wufei followed, only he got off the stool a bit less ungracefully. Well ok, he actually FELL off. The two women ignored them and closed in on their last prey, namely Duo as he suddenly became trapped by two stools at his sides and the girls in front.

"Eh...eh-heh, um, I don't swing that way," Duo said meekly, backing away from the probing stares. He felt as if they were stripping him with their eyes, which they probably were.

"Oh really?" the black-haired beauty asked.

"Then WHY weren't you dancing with those guys? Even I can admit they were hot," the blonde added.

"Um...well, I HAVE a BOYfriend, so, uh, I couldn't dance with them! Yeah..."

"Where is he?" the blue-eyed one asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Oh...you know...probably off dancing with another woman!" Duo laughed. It sounded very fake. "I mean, you know how men are...alllll...cocky...and...full of themselves...and stuff..." he trailed off, and offered them a hopeful smile.

"Oh yes, I know EXACTLY what you mean," the blonde said, feigning sympathy. "Which is why you need to come with US. We'll show you what a good time REALLY is." Duo's eyes widened even more.

"Ah, no really! That's ok! Oh, look! There he is right now. Uh...FRED! Fred honey, come here!" With that, Duo shoved both girls aside and sped out into the crowd.

"Damn!" the blonde sighed, snapping her fingers.

"We almost had her," said the other. They were left sulking at the bar.

Elsewhere...

"AHHHH! How could you guys LEAVE me like that!" Duo screamed. He'd finally found Wufei and Heero in the crowd. He couldn't tell if they were actually dancing or just pretending to dance though, so he ignored their weird swaying. Maybe the alcohol had finally caught up with them and they were just drunk...

"Sorry Du-chan," Wufei slurred, leaning on Heero's shoulder for extra support.

"Ya, we like, thought you could totally handle them," Heero added. He hiccupped before continuing. "You know...POW!" He swung at an invisible enemy to visualize his statement. Duo raised an eyebrow.

'Yep, they're drunk.' As soon as he thought this, Wufei hiccupped. 'Stark drunk.'

"Where's -_hiccup_ _- _Sally?" Wufei asked. Then he paused. "And the others too," he added as an afterthought. Duo shook his head.

"I don't know, but I think we should go find them and get you guys home."

"No!" Heero shouted out, looking alarmed. "Wanna dance. Want...another drink..."

"How many did you have?" Duo asked warily. Heero appeared to be in deep concentration for a minute, before shrugging. "The bartender said you were on your fifth when I went to see Trowa and Quat," Duo said helpfully. Heero nodded.

"I los' track -_hiccup_ -aroun'...seven... -_hiccup_ - I think..."

"Shit..."

"An' I had one'mo than 'im," Wufei slurred proudly.

"I don't get it," Duo murmured. "You two were fine a second ago. That stuff kicks in pretty abruptly." He paused and looked around for second. "Ok, guys, Stay. Right. Here. I'm going to find the others. I WILL BE RIGHT BACK," Duo said, slowly and loudly so they would hear him. They both nodded. Duo turned and walked deeper into the crowd, looking for the girls. He didn't have to look long, and found them all dancing in a big group. Even Quatre was with them, but Trowa stood off to the side looking awkward. The green-eyed teen spotted Duo and immediately started towards him.

"Quatre had two drinks and I swear he's lost it," Trowa said when he reached Duo.

"How many did you have?"

"Three." Duo nodded.

"Well, Wufei and Heero had an unknown amount but they lost track around seven. They're completely out-of-it."

"I think it's about time we headed back," Trowa said slowly, looking at the group of dancing females behind him.

"Yeah, we definitely should. I'm tired of getting hit on by guys AND girls," Duo spat. Trowa raised an eyebrow.

"GIRLS hit on you?"

"They saw us refusing guys and jumped to conclusions."

"Aah... Well, let's go tell them we need to leave now," Trowa said, referring to Sally and the others. Duo nodded, and they went to gather the girls. It didn't take much persuading, because they were all tired. Except for when Quatre started bawling because he didn't want to leave the dance floor. They almost had to drag him out. Almost... When they finally got to where Duo had left Heero and Wufei, they found them both dancing crazily. They'd formed quite a crowd. Whether it was because people actually wanted to watch them or they were just avoiding their flailing arms was unknown.

"Should have brought my camera," Duo muttered. When Heero and Wufei saw their group they broke out into wide smiles. It was kind of scary. Both of them had to be dragged off the floor similarly to Quatre, but they finally got them home and into bed.

The next morning was not pretty. All the bathrooms were occupied, and sounds of people retching and complaining could be heard all over the house. Heh, but I won't go into those details.

& & & &

For the last few days they were on vacation, the group spent their time doing various things. While it was light out they usually stayed down at the beach. They went on a boat tour one day, and on another day they rented jet skis. At night they either went out to eat or went to a movie. They avoided the dance clubs, though mainly for the guys' sake. The last night they were there, Tuesday, was one of the best. There was a fair on the boardwalk of the beach, and they'd decided to go to it after they finished their souvenir shopping. It was a lot of fun, and they stayed out really late, so they all came home exhausted. Happy, but exhausted. Without a second thought, they'd all fallen asleep.

The next morning, Wufei was awakened by extremely loud yelling from downstairs. Groaning, he fished his glasses case out from under his pillow and groggily put the glasses on. The first thing he noticed was that he was the only one in the room. A quick glance at the clock told him it was only 9:30. He winced at that the fact that he thought it was "only" 9:30. Two weeks ago he would have been furious at himself for sleeping so late. Lately though, he and the other guys' internal clocks had been shut down.

"Well not today apparently," Wufei mumbled to himself. He slowly climbed out of bed and jumped to the ground, landing nimbly on his feet. The second thing he noticed that morning was how the sheets of the others' beds were thrown everywhere, like they'd been in a hurry. For a brief second he was worried that something had happened, thus the reason for all the yelling, but the third thing he noticed was that the yelling actually sounded more like...cheering? Curiosity quickly took hold of Wufei and he made his way downstairs after a quick glance in the mirror to make sure he was presentable. Well, ok, it wasn't THAT quick, he actually had to stop and brush his hair and straighten out his pajama pants and matching spaghetti-strapped shirt. But after that, he headed downstairs.

Wufei found the sources of all the noise in the living room. He blinked wearily a couple of times before asking, "What are you all so happy about?" He pulled off his glasses and rubbed an arm across his eyes, not noticing how quiet the room had gotten. Then he put his glasses back on and looked at the occupants in the room for the first time. His jaw dropped.

Standing before him were the girls and the other guys who were actually...GUYS. Shock settled in as Wufei looked at the people in the room whose wide-eyed expressions matched his own. They had every right to be happy, he realized vaguely. They were men again. Granted they all looked funny wearing girls' pajama pants that were way to short on them and spaghetti-strapped shirts. But still, they were MEN.

There was just one problem with all of this.

Wufei was still a girl.

* * *

:whistles innocently: Hehe. Almost done now!

-Maxine


	17. Chapter 16

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Chapter 16

* * *

Wufei stared.

And stared.

And stared some more.

He finally attempted to open his mouth and say something, but no words would come out and he was left looking like a fish out of water. The girls, sensing that a whole lot of yelling was soon to come, inched slowly out of the room. It wasn't like they had any idea why everyone except for Wufei had turned back into a man, and they didn't want to be a part of the argument that was sure to come. They made it out of the room just in time.

"What the hell!" Wufei screeched, causing the other guys to wince as they came out of their shocked trances. "Why the hell are you guys back to normal! It's only Wednesday!" The four who were back to their normal state shared worried glances.

"Uh," Quatre spoke up. "Well...ah...we don't exactly know." Wufei groaned and glanced down at himself, hoping desperately that maybe he WAS a guy again, and just hadn't noticed. After all, his hair WAS already long... Nope he was definitely a girl, if the way the spaghetti-strapped shirt clung to his figure and hung low to show the tops of his breasts was any hint. Suddenly self-conscious of the four pairs of very MALE eyes on him, Wufei pulled his shirt up a little in an attempt to cover more of his chest. Of course, this only resulted in half of his tanned stomach being shown. Scowling, he yanked the shirt back down to where it originally was. The silence in the room was becoming unbearable.

"What?" Wufei asked warily, crossing his arms across his chest. Abruptly, all four heads shook themselves slightly, and Quatre's already sunburned face turned a darker red. Wufei growled.

"Man Wufei, I don't know what to say!" Duo said cheerfully, crossing his arms behind his head. The movement caused his own to shirt to ride up higher than it had been, since it was already too small on his male form. "Damn. I definitely didn't bring any guy clothes with me," he continued on, oblivious to Wufei's glare.

"I did," Quatre and Heero spoke simultaneously. Wufei growled again, and stomped across the room to where Duo was standing, and began poking him in the chest.

"How can you even think about CLOTHES at a time like this!" he spat out, each poke punctuating his words. He was a bit miffed that he had to crane his neck back to look into Duo's face, and that only made him angrier. Duo, startled by the Chinese teen's sudden anger, dropped his arms slightly and took a step back, his eyes widening.. "Just because YOU are all back to normal does NOT mean everything here is peachy keen!" Wufei continued, pushing Duo back which each poke until his back hit the wall. Wufei, oblivious to this, stood up on his toes so he could look Duo in the eyes. Inadvertently, this caused his entire body to lean into Duo's. "I am still in a freakin' WOMAN'S BODY, in case you hadn't noticed!" Duo's eyes were impossibly wide as he gulped.

"Oh, eh-heh, I noticed all right," he squeaked out. Immediately, his face flared up in color, and he cleared his throat self-consciously. Wufei's eyes snapped wide.

"Duo!" Quatre cried, shocked at what he just said. Trowa and Heero both coughed and glanced away. Wufei jumped back from Duo, his face several shades paler. Duo looked noticeably relieved at the distance between them now.

"I couldn't help it, Quat!" he said defensively. "LOOK at him! Would YOU like him pressed all up against you?" Quatre blushed again, and coughed.

"Er..." he mumbled, and quickly trailed off. Wufei, still standing in the middle of the room, thought about that. Had Duo pressed his female form up against his male one, he definitely would have had the same reaction. He crossed his arms and glared at the floor, cursing his current situation. Relena poked her head through the door into the extremely quiet room.

"Why don't you all go change?" she suggested softly. "We'll have breakfast ready when you come down and we'll talk."

"Aren't we leaving today?" Trowa asked.

"Well, we were supposed to leave about an hour ago," Relena said. "Traffic will be horrible now, and if we leave this afternoon, we won't get back until late. We don't actually have to hand the house keys over until tomorrow..." she trailed off and shrugged.

"So we're staying until tomorrow," Heero concluded. Relena nodded. "Good, I can actually go to the beach as a GUY." Duo frowned.

"I didn't bring my suit!" he whined.

"I brought extras," both Heero and Quatre said simultaneously again. Duo smiled.

"Then what are we waiting for!" he exclaimed, dashing out of the room. The others followed at a much slower pace, Wufei bringing up the rear. By the time they got to their room, Duo had already stripped his shirt off and was rummaging through one of the dressers. He paused suddenly, lifting out a bra that was hanging on his finger.

"Thank God I don't have to wear these anymore," he snickered. "Where's your guy stuff, Heero?"

"That's MY dresser," Wufei growled, snatching the bra out of his hand.

"Oops."

"Damn it, Winner, stop blushing. You were only wearing these things the whole week," Wufei grumbled, as he noticed the blonde teen's face darken again. He walked over to his bunk and climbed up to his bed. Sighing, he glanced down at the bra in his hand. Why him? WHY? Suddenly, a stray shirt smacked him in the head.

"Oops, sorry Wu-man!" Duo called cheerfully. Wufei glanced up to glare at him, but froze as he noticed clothes EVERYWHERE.

"What the hell?" he whispered to himself.

"I KNOW I put two swimsuits in here," Heero grumbled to himself as he flung various outfits over his shoulder. He wouldn't be needing THOSE clothes anymore.

"Heero, they're over here," Duo said, picking up two pairs of black trunks. "You threw them out when you threw those other clothes out." Heero "hn"ed and snatched a suit out of Duo's hand.

"You're going to have to clean that, you know," Quatre said, offering Trowa a dark green swimsuit he'd brought with him.

"Later," Heero said, abruptly taking off his shirt. He paused suddenly, glancing up at Wufei. The Chinese teen was still sitting on his bunk, ogling the four, now topless, former Gundam pilots. Heero raised an eyebrow. "You going to change, Wufei?" he asked, smirking slightly. Wufei snapped out of his dazed state quickly, and glared back.

"Oh yes, I hope you don't mind me stripping down right here," he snapped, reaching down to grab his red and black suit which was hanging off the bed. When he got no reply, he glanced back up again. All four of them were staring at him, or more or less at his breasts as he bent over. Growling for the umpteenth that day, Wufei sat up straight and practically ripped off his shirt. As he was wearing no bra, the effect was almost immediate. Duo, who'd been leaning over a little too far, promptly fell and smacked his chin on the ground as he stared on in shock. Trowa and Heero's eyes shot wide open and both of their ears tinted red. Quatre nearly had a nosebleed as he abruptly turned around. Wufei, top halfway on, smirked. "What's wrong?" he asked sweetly. "You've been seeing the same thing every time you looked in the mirror for the past week and a half," he finished dangerously, pulling his top all the way down. The three still gawking slowly looked away and tried to act normal. Wufei made a disapproving sound and hopped of the bed so he could finish getting ready in the bathroom. As soon as the door clicked shut, Duo groaned.

"Ooowww," he moaned, rubbing his chin. "That hurt like a bitch." The others were quiet.

"I need a shower," Heero said suddenly, heading out the door and towards the girls' room.

"Same," Trowa said monotonously, looking at the suit Quatre had given him.

"A cold one," Duo mumbled, throwing himself into the pile of clothes on the floor.

"Guys," Quatre chided softly. "It's just Wufei."

"'Just Wufei,' he says," Duo snorted, burying his face in the clothes. "She's freakin'- HE'S fre- wait no, that wouldn't sound right. She...he...damn it! He's fucking HOT!"

"I'm sure Wufei would LOVE to hear you say that," Trowa remarked sarcastically. He picked up the green bikini he'd been wearing that week. "Though I'm inclined to agree with you," he mumbled, images of Wufei when he'd been wearing it flashing through his mind. Of course, he'd been a girl then too, and could have cared less.

"You guys!" Quatre scolded again. Just then, Heero stormed back in.

"That was fast," Duo commented, looking up at him. He was already dressed in his bathing suit and water dripped from his still wet hair, leaving a trail down his body.

"Hn."

"No, seriously. You were gone for like three seconds," Duo stated. Before Heero could reply, the bathroom door opened, and out came Wufei, dressed the way he had been the first day they went down to the beach. All four guys stared at him.

"What?" he snapped irritably, brushing past them and into the hallway. The four watched him leave.

"I feel bad for him," Quatre said.

"He's only got three more days, he'll live," Heero said, searching for a dry towel.

"I don't know if I will," Duo complained.

"You've got Hilde to occupy yourself with," Trowa said, nudging the braided teen with his foot. Duo shot up, his eyes wide.

"Hilde! You're right!" He smiled wide and engulfed Trowa in a bear hug. "Thanks, T!" he cried, grabbing the black pair of trunks Heero had given and dashing into the bathroom. A full two seconds later, he dashed back out again and ran downstairs. Trowa blinked.

"O...kaaay." Heero shrugged.

"Get dressed," he suggested, sitting down to tie his shoes. "I'm hungry."

Some ten minutes later, the other three now-men walked into the kitchen, dressed in their beach attire. There was a table full of food waiting for them, and the girls, minus Hilde who was occupied with a certain God of Death in the corner, were still working on frying some bacon. The smells wafted through the air, and almost simultaneously the guys stomachs' began growling. Without waiting to be told, the guys, including Duo, who'd managed to detach himself from Hilde in order to quiet his stomach, pulled out chairs, sat, and dug in. Wufei watched them, absolutely shocked at how much they could inhale without getting it all over themselves. In fact, they all had great table manners, with maybe the exception of Duo.

"Do we...always eat that much?" Wufei whispered to Sally. She smiled.

"Why do you think we made so much?" she replied. Wufei just blinked in astonishment.

The day passed uneventfully for the most part. The guys stayed in the sun the whole time, in a vain attempt to get a normal tan for themselves. Wufei sulked to himself under one of the big umbrellas. He was AVOIDING the sun. And the rest of the girls actually enjoyed their last day at the beach by boogie-boarding, tanning, eating ice cream, and having a grand ol' time. When the sun finally started to set, the group gathered up their things and headed back to the house.

"Guys, I say we go out to eat tonight," Sally said as they trudged back up the sand dunes. "We didn't last night because of the fair, and we haven't actually eaten at a really NICE restaurant the whole trip."

"No," Wufei said firmly. "Not a chance. Nice restaurants mean dressing up. I REFUSE to dress up again for the remainder of the time that I am a...woman."

"Aw, Wufei! It'd be fun," Midii spoke up. "Sally's right, we should make our last night here a nice event."

"Fine, then you all go. I'll stay home," Wufei said stubbornly, crossing his arms.

"Wufei, don't be such a grouch!" Duo teased playfully, giving him a slight punch in the arm. Wufei scowled at him.

"Well, what would you wear? I'm pretty sure Heero and Quatre did not think ahead enough to bring four 'nice-restaurant' outfits," Wufei spat out. That caused the others to pause.

"I brought some slacks, but only one pair of shoes," Heero finally spoke up.

"Why on earth did you even bring guy clothes?" Hilde asked, hugging Duo's arm. Heero shrugged.

"Just in case. You never know." Quatre nodded in agreement.

"Right, as a Gundam pilot, it became a habit to always be prepared," he added.

"Well, let's go buy some shoes for you all right now then," Relena suggested. There were murmurs of agreement from the group, and they set off towards some shops along the boardwalk.

& & & &

A few hours later, the group found themselves sitting in one of the nicer restaurants along the beach they were at. It was a warm night, so they chose a table on the patio outback, overlooking the water below. There was some soft music in the background, barely audible over the sound of the waves crashing into the rocks.

"This is a nice place," Quatre commented after they ordered their food. Wufei snorted, but Quatre ignored him and continued on. "How did you find out about it?"

"It was in one of the brochures we had," Sally answered, taking a sip of her ice tea. "Actually, Wufei found it for us." Quatre blinked.

"Er...Wufei?" he asked. Wufei growled.

"Not on purpose," Dorothy spoke up. "He was trying to throw the brochure away so we wouldn't see it. Hilde caught him," she finished, smirking. Duo burst out laughing.

"Nice try, Wu-man!" he exclaimed. Wufei just slouched lower into his seat, scowling at everything. Other than the sounds of glasses clinking together, it was silent for a while before Duo stood up abruptly and turned to Hilde. "May I have this dance, milady?" he asked, faking a British accent and bending over with his hand extended. Hilde smiled.

"Of course, my good sir," she replied, taking the hand offered to her and pulling herself out of the seat. They began swaying easily together to the music, causing the other girls at the table looked on dreamily. The song eventually faded into another one, causing Relena to perk up noticeably. Across the table from her, Heero blinked, trying to figure out where he had heard it before. As realization hit him, he looked up and glanced at Relena, who appeared to have gone off into a happy dream world. Heero smirked and stood up, walking over to stand in front of her. She blinked and glanced up at him, before smiling slightly.

"Are you still going to kill me, Heero?" she asked softly.

"Yes," he answered monotonously, though his eyes were twinkling with emotion. He held out a hand and Relena eagerly accepted it. The two joined Hilde and Duo on the dance floor. Quatre scratched his head.

"Um...was anyone else confused by that exchange?" he asked. Both Trowa and Wufei raised their hands slightly.

"It was sooo romantic," Midii said dreamily. Trowa winced as she shifted her gaze to him.

"Uh...w-would you care to dance, Midii?" he asked after a slight hesitation. Midii smiled.

"Of course," she replied. They left, leaving Quatre, Wufei, Sally, and Dorothy at the table. Quatre sighed.

"Would any of you three like to dance?" he asked politely, eyes roaming around the table, before they jerked to Wufei who was clenching his teeth together and turning a lovely shade of red. Quatre immediately realized his mistake. "Two!" he exclaimed, eyes widening. "I-I meant any of you TWO! Honest, Wufei. I'm sorry, really! I am! I didn't mean-"

"Winner! Shut UP!" Wufei ground out. "It's ok," he continued in a calmer tone. Quatre still appeared a little flustered, so Dorothy sighed and came to his rescue.

"I'll dance with you, Mr. Winner," she said. Quatre looked at her exasperatedly.

"Dorothy..." The said girl smiled.

"Fine. I'll dance with you...QUATRE." Quatre smiled and offered her his arm, before the two headed off to join the others. Sally sighed and rested her chin on her fist, casting a look at Wufei out of the corner of her eye. Wufei scowled.

"Don't look at me like that," he snapped. "You know that if I were a man I'd ask you to dance."

"You would?" Sally asked, smiling. Wufei blinked.

"Well, er...it would be rude not to when everyone else is dancing..." he trailed off, flushing a light pink. Sally just smiled and said nothing.

"Hey, Duo, one of you guys should ask Sally to dance," Hilde said to her boyfriend as they moved slowly around the dance floor. Duo glanced over to their table.

"Hey, Trowa," he said as they moved closer to him and Midii. "Go ask Sally to dance."

"Oh, poor Sally. Yeah, Trowa, you should go ask her," Midii said, lifting her head from Trowa's shoulder. Trowa blinked.

"Alright," he said. "But why me?" Duo smirked.

"Because you're the only one as tall as she is," he replied in a "no-duh" kind of tone. Hilde smacked him lightly on the shoulder, but Trowa just returned the smirk. "Oh, hey," Duo continued, "ten bucks I can get Wufei on the dance floor before we eat," he said, holding out his hand. Trowa raised an eyebrow.

"With you?" he asked incredulously. "Or are you going to get someone else to ask him." Duo paused.

"Um...with me. Ten bucks I'll get him to dance with me." Trowa eyed him for a minute, before grasping his hand and shaking it.

"You're on," he said. "I need my money back from that last bet we had anyway." Duo smirked.

"You won't be getting it back," he said. "Hey, Hil, why don't you and Midii go to the bathroom or something?"

"I can't believe you're betting on poor Wufei," she said, shaking her head. "Men!" she exclaimed before pulling Midii off the restrooms. Trowa and Duo headed back to the table.

"Sally, would you like to dance?" Trowa asked as soon as they reached their destination. Duo plopped down in the seat next to Wufei.

"I'd love to, Trowa. But...where did Midii go?" Sally answered.

"She and Hilde are in the bathroom," Duo answered, blowing bubbles into his coke. Sally watched him for a minute, and then turned to Trowa.

"Ok, dance, now. Let's go." Trowa nodded and the two quickly left. Wufei glared at Duo disgustedly.

"What?" he asked innocently.

"You...are disgusting," Wufei replied. Duo blinked and shrugged.

"Oh well. Hey, wanna dance?" Wufei promptly choked on his drink and looked at Duo's smiling face through wide eyes.

"...Excuse me?"

"Do. You. Want. To. Dance?" Duo reiterated. Wufei face-faulted.

"No, not with YOU."

"Aw, come on! Just one dance, pleeeaaaase?" Wufei stared at him incredulously.

"Have you forgotten who I am?" he asked unbelievingly.

"Nope. You're Chang Wufei, pilot of Gundam 05, last of the Dragon Clan, age 17 and have already been through the whole marriage thing. You're rude, sexist-"

"Exactly," Wufei cut him off, before pausing. "Hey!" Duo shrugged.

"Sorry." Wufei glared at him. "So...let's dance!"

"Duo, I am NOT going to dance with you!"

"Why not?" Duo whined.

"Because I'm not really a woman!"

"So? You looked all lonely by yourself."

"Sally was with me."

"Well she's not anymore."

"Duo," Wufei sighed, "why are you so annoying?"

"I won't call you Wu-man for a week," Duo offered hopefully. Wufei blinked.

"A month." Duo considered that.

"Fine," he said, standing up and holding out his hand. Wufei grimaced, and ignored the hand, getting up by himself.

"And you can't go into my room without my permission, ever."

"But that was already one of your rules," Duo reminded him.

"Yeah, but now you actually have to abide by it. I mean it too. If you don't, you'll find yourself without a braid one morning." Duo's eyes widened.

"Geez, fine. All I wanted was one lousy dance," Duo grumbled.

"And I still don't know why," Wufei replied, following him onto the floor. Duo didn't answer. Instead he turned and wrapped his arms around Wufei's waist, causing the Chinese teen to squeak in surprise. "Duo!" he exclaimed angrily.

"It's just a dance," Duo said. "Calm down." Wufei closed his eyes and counted to ten before reluctantly putting his hands on Duo's shoulders. Duo "tsk"ed and pulled him closer, forcing Wufei to wrap his arms around his neck. Wufei scowled. "You want to know why?"

"Why what?" Wufei asked tightly.

"Why I asked you to dance," Duo replied cheerfully. Wufei eyed him warily.

"Why?" Duo leaned forward so that his face was only an inch or so away from Wufei's. For the briefest second, Wufei was scared to death that Duo was going to kiss him or something and admit his undying love to him. Wufei's eyes widened. Duo took a breath and braced himself for the outburst he knew would come.

"Ten bucks," he whispered, smirking. Wufei blinked, his eyes narrowing slightly before widening again in realization.

"You asshole!" he exclaimed, punching his shoulder.

"Hey, hey, hey! I'll give you half of it, ok?" Duo said, laughing. Wufei glared up at him.

"Which of these other jerks did you bet with?" he asked dangerously.

"Me," came Trowa's voice from next to them. "I didn't think you'd actually give in." Wufei glared at Trowa and gave him the finger. Trowa just smirked and shrugged.

& & & &

The following morning, the gang packed up and left, arriving home late in the afternoon. The rest of the day was spent lazily. Wufei, still pissed at everyone because they'd decided to take pictures of him dancing with Duo the night before, locked himself in his room. He didn't even bother coming down for dinner. The day after that, Friday, was supposed to be Wufei's last day as a woman, so he was in a much better mood. He came downstairs dressed in a pair of old sweat pants and a baggy t-shirt that had the word "JUSTICE" written across the front of it.

"Good morning, Wufei," Relena said as he entered the dining room. She and some of the others were scattered around the table, drinking coffee or reading newspapers. "They're some waffles in the kitchen. Coffee's in there too. Do you want any?" Wufei nodded meekly as his stomach growled. Relena smiled. "I'll get you some." Wufei nodded again gratefully, and sat down beside Heero.

"I want out of this body," he moaned, causing Heero to smirk at him.

"Well, this is your last day, right?"

"Hopefully. I still don't know why you were changed back before me anyway," Wufei scowled.

"Because it wasn't entirely their fault in the first place," a vaguely familiar voice said. Everyone in the room tensed, looking around warily. Just then, Relena re-entered the room.

"Here you go Wuf-"

_POOF!_

Relena was cut off as a cloud of purplish smoke erupted in front of her, causing her to screech and drop the plate and mug she was holding. They crashed on the floor sending glass and bits of syrup covered food everywhere. Heero was by her side in an instant, gun out and making sure she was ok.

"I-I'm fine, Heero. It just shocked me, that's all," Relena said, trying to calm her breathing. Heero nodded and turned to the cloaked figure emerging from the smoke. One of its arms lifted and a pale hand pointed at them. Heero stiffened and pushed Relena behind him. The arm lowered slightly, and the hand spread. A burst of light emitted from it, picking up the broken pieces of the dish and all the food. As it hovered in mid-air, then hand closed and then opened quickly with a blinding flash of light. When it cleared, the plate and food were good as new, and the mess was gone. The arm moved towards the table and directed the food down so that it landed in front of Wufei, before the arm finally dropped completely. By this point, everyone was gathered around the dining room, whether they were sitting at the table or peering in through the doors. The cloaked figure's hands rose up and slowly lowered its hood, revealing a pale face with big, clear-blue eyes and long, shiny, silver hair.

"Sorry about that, Relena. I didn't mean to startle you," the Goddess of Death said cheerfully, smiling widely. Heero immediately lowered his gun now that the would-be threat was gone.

"You're back," he stated.

"Mhmm, a day early, I know. But that's all right. How've you all been?"

"Like hell," Wufei growled. The Goddess of Death narrowed her eyes at him.

"Half the world goes through it everyday for their entire lives," she snapped. Wufei didn't reply.

"So...um, may I ask why you're here?" Quatre asked after a few moments of uncomfortable silence. The Goddess of Death turned and smiled at the blonde.

"To change Wufei back of course!" she answered cheerfully. Wufei blinked.

"Really?" he asked excitedly, despite the attempt to keep his voice monotonous.

"Well...maybe," she replied. Wufei's face fell.

"May...be?"

"Yes, maybe. Why SHOULD I change you back?"

"B-because! I want to a man again!" Wufei exclaimed.

"Yes, but WHY? What's the big problem with being a woman?"

"I don't LIKE being a woman! That's the problem!" Wufei yelled, standing up from the table.

"WHY?" the Goddess of Women insisted.

"Because they're WEAK!" The Goddess of Women sighed.

"But are they really, Wufei?" she asked, her calm voice startling Wufei. "You couldn't even deal with it for two weeks. How would you like dealing with it forever?" Wufei lowered his clenched fists slowly.

"Fine," he ground out. "Fine. I COULDN'T deal with it. Ok? I wouldn't be able to deal with getting my period every freaking month, along with all the stupid mood swings. I don't like being hit by men when I'm clearly not interested. I hate having to put on make-up everyday. I hated it all! Fine, women deserve a lot more then I give them credit for, alright? Are you happy? Can I please be a MAN again?" The Goddess of Women smiled slightly.

"Very good, Wufei. I liked that answer. Now, just tell me the main thing you learned out of all of this, and you'll be a man again as soon as you blink. And don't play stupid. You KNOW what I want to hear." Everyone in the room turned their heads towards Wufei. He grimaced, and opened his mouth to speak before closing it again. He tried again, and failed. He looked up at the ceiling once as if saying, "Why me?" Finally, he managed to get the words out.

"Women...women aren't...weak," he said tiredly. "There, happy? I said it. Women AREN'T weak. Now change me back, damn it!" The Goddess of Women grinned.

"It is done," she said simply, disappearing in another cloud of smoke. The occupants of the room began coughing and waving it away.

"Is everyone ok?" Duo called out, holding Hilde close to him.

"Man, am I glad THAT is over with," Dorothy muttered to Sally.

"Wufei! Are you alright?" Trowa called out, trying to find the Chinese teen. He didn't get an answer.

"Wufei?" Quatre asked. The smoke finally cleared to reveal Wufei on the other side of the table, looking down his shirt. When he lifted his head, there was a huge, very uncharacteristic smile across his face. It was apparently contagious, because soon everyone else was smiling with him.

"I'M A MAN AGAIN!" he exclaimed. The others just laughed.

**¡END!**

* * *

Ok, it's actually not the end because there's still the epilogue... :)

-Maxine


	18. Epilogue

Women Aren't So Weak, Wufei! - Epilogue

* * *

_Four years later:_

"Sally! Come on, breathe! One, two, one, two. Breathe! Push! Do something, damn it!" Wufei yelled at his extremely pregnant wife. She was about to, well, NOT be pregnant anymore.

"Wufei," Sally gritted out through clenched teeth, "You're NOT helping!"

"Sir, try to keep your wife calm," one of the doctors in the room said. Wufei snorted.

"What do you think I'm doing? It's not that easy, you know," he muttered. Sally let out a huge sigh as the pain left for a brief moment, and she let her head rest on the pillows behind her.

"Wufei, I'm exhausted," she said tiredly.

"Weak onna. You shouldn't be. The brat's not even crowning yet," Wufei muttered. He was trying hard not to show how worried he actually was. Sally's eyes hardened.

"Well it's STILL painful. Maybe YOU would like to try this sometime? Hmm?" she snapped.

"It is not my job to give birth to children. That's what women are for," Wufei said haughtily. Sally growled, but before she could say anything, another contraction hit, and she doubled over in pain as much as her bulging stomach would allow. Without thinking, she squeezed Wufei's hand, which she had been holding, with all her might, getting a startled yelp of pain from the Chinese pilot.

"AHHHHHH!" she screamed in pain. "I swear, Wufei, I am going to castrate you when this is done! No more kids! EVER!"

"Ok, you can start pushing now," the doctor said. "Let's get this baby out." Wufei's eyes widened as Sally started whimpering. "Ok, rest for a minute," the doctor ordered after a minute or so.

"Damn it, onna. Just push harder and get the kid out faster."

"Alright, you know what Wufei?" Sally started, but a sudden flashed interrupted her. When she could see again, she noticed bewilderedly that she was sitting in the chair beside the hospital bed she had just been in. Wufei blinked, trying to figure out what was going on. He attempted to sit up, but failed. It was around this time that Wufei noticed some new adjustments made to his body. Mainly the fact that he had a large chest and an extremely round stomach. Wufei paled as Sally started laughing. For some unknown reason, no one else in the room noticed anything. Wufei looked at Sally with wide, panicked eyes.

"Don't worry, honey," Sally said calmly, actually a little worried for her husband. "It's not THAT painful."

"Sally!" Wufei screeched frantically. Before she could reply, a pain like no other sliced through his lower abdomen.

"Ok, now push!" the oblivious doctor ordered again.

"And breathe Wufei," Sally instructed from his side. "It shouldn't be too much longer now."

"Damn it! I didn't mean it!" Wufei ground out through his pain. "Freakin' 'Goddess of Women.' Damn her to hell! I shouldn't be giving birth to a child. This isn't happening! NOOOOOO!"

& & & &

"AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" Wufei shot straight up in bed, looking around frantically. He was very relieved to discover that he was indeed NOT giving birth, and Sally wasn't anywhere near him. Some dream...married to Sally? Pfft, yeah right. Wufei screeched again as he felt a hand clamp gently onto his shoulder.

"Honey, are you ok?" a male voice asked worriedly. Wufei froze. He recognized that voice. He turned around slowly to face the speaker.

"Dan?" he asked meekly.

"Who else would it be, love?"

"Uhh...I don't feel very good."

"Yeah, you need to be more careful. Outbursts like that can upset the baby, remember?"

"The...baby?" Wufei replied faintly. He glanced down at his stomach, afraid to see what he knew would be there. And there it was...an obscenely large stomach. He was...pregnant. At that moment, the door to the room swung open, and two toddlers came running in.

"Mommy! Mommy! We heard you yelling! Are you ok?" Wufei's eyebrow twitched, and his last resolve broke.

& & & &

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

Wufei shot straight up in bed...again. But before he did anything else, he immediately started patting his chest and stomach. He let out a huge sigh, immensely relieved to discover that both were undoubtedly FLAT. Flopping back down onto the bed, Wufei pinched himself as an extra precaution to make sure he was awake. He smiled as he felt the minor pain inflicted. A dream in a dream was bad enough. He didn't need to have a dream in a dream in dream. That would have SUCKED. Wufei started to curse at the Goddess of Women, but stopped abruptly. He didn't want to be a woman AGAIN. He learned his lesson the first time, thank you very much. Wufei sighed again, and let his eyes droop. He needed to go back to sleep. After all, he had school in the morning.

**¡(the real) END!**

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And that's that! Thank you so much for reading it, everyone! Let me know what you think:)

-Maxine

P.S. That "Four years later" was part of the first dream sequence, in case you didn't get that. Wufei's really still seventeen at the end.


End file.
